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Residual Parenting Commitments, The Last Turkey In The Shop, Boiled Bunnies, Men With Fish and Stolen Condoms. Dating Thread XXXI.

(1000 Posts)
FlorentinePogen Tue 04-Dec-12 19:49:03

Get on with it, daters.............smile

lubeybooby Wed 05-Dec-12 07:58:54

ooh new thread. <placemarking>

KirstyWirsty Wed 05-Dec-12 08:07:39

oww you should go for the job!!

48 I changed my POF profile (before I deleted it) to say' if you send me an interesting opening message I promise to reply' .. Didn't get a single Hi babe after that but it was only a day grin

WhatDoesTheDogSay Wed 05-Dec-12 08:25:14

Morning all, marking a place. Lots of happenings thread-wise!

western, your ex still hasn't signed! Let's hope greed will get the better of him, as you say.

kirsty, shame about the Auditor. Hope you're not too disappointed. Just goes to show, you never really know where you are with OD!

bantam, reading about the artist def sets alarm bells ringing... Hope you will follow your gut (though far easier said than done when good sex is involved).

lulu, hope you're feeling brighter. Counselling alongside mediation sounds like a good idea, if you're sure that mediation is def the way to go where a man like your ex is concerned.

Juliette, what site are you on now? eharmony sounds even worse than match affinity!

mercury, I love that you had a meet-up in a supermarket. Brilliant idea!

everyone else have lost track somewhat!

Well I had a pre-date at the weekend. It was ok, in that he was a friendly, chatty guy, but absolutely no chance of things progressing. He kept burping. Enough said. Oh, and bill, there was not a hint of aftershave, and I found that off-putting. Now I really don't know if I CBA after all!

Hey guys

Sort of placemarking to say I'm disappearing off this thread (still on others) for a while. I'm finding the whole long-term single thing a bit crappy at the moment, especially with Christmas coming up, so I think reading about everyone's exploits is probably not going to help. Will come back when I have regained some positivity. In the meantime....

Bant - I think if it was me, I'd be concerned about the Artist
Lulu - I, too, think counselling is a good move
Juliette - Eharmony is awful and I read somewhere that it was a very 'Christian' organisation which may have some bearing
Bill - enjoy!
OWW, Kirsty, Snape etc - keep the faith and the woo ticking over!

Snapespeare Wed 05-Dec-12 09:12:47

VoU no! it's not just for the Coffee partakers - it's for the grumpy elves as well. Stay <pats sofa invitingly> there's plenty of doom and gloom as well! grin

48howdidthathappen Wed 05-Dec-12 09:15:07

whatdoes a burping date. What a catch grin

voice it is what I have always disliked about christmas. The idea that you should be having a ball. This year I will be alone for the first time. My ex for obvious reasons, my son is in OZ, my daughter will be with her boyfriend.
I am going to spend it with my single sister. We are having a non christmas. Dog walk, huge breakfast for lunch, then get completely hammered smile
Mr Fuck is alone for christmas, I do feel bad about that, he will be missing his kids sad

ike1 Wed 05-Dec-12 09:21:56

What-there is a very good reason some of these guys are single! Voice I can assure you there is no Coffee chez Ike and furthermore no Xmas cheer either. Gonna have to paint on the fake smile like all the other goons for the sake of the kids but in my mind I will be gurning and grimacing...48 I think your idea sounds great!

Yogagirl17 Wed 05-Dec-12 09:28:38

Voice/Snape - I can do doom and gloom too!! ��

Re "hey babe" on POF - yep, happens ALL the time, at least 50% if messages I would say. One of the many reasons I gave up on it completely. I tried at one point to put in my profile, 'if you can't be bothered to compose a sentence that consists of more than 'hey hun' then please don't bother.' I just ended up getting messages that told me I was clearly uptight and frigid. Sheesh, I said please and everything! grin

Counselling can be good. Wish I could afford a few private sessions - went to GP for a referral but by the time it comes through I will a)be working nearly full time and b)probably won't feel like it anymore.

48howdidthathappen Wed 05-Dec-12 09:33:59

yoga I did advise a few of them to watch the 'Dating tips for Men' vid on POF.

That went down well grin

Thanks, guys, as you can see, I haven't quite gone yet, probably tonight. This is my third Xmas and New Year on my own and quite frankly had enough of it all. Am in one of those "am going to be perpetually single for the rest of my life" moods and as pretty much everyone I know is coupled and have large families, they'll all be busy doing stuff and I won't. Haven't even got work between Xmas and New Year this time. I feel like emulating a squirrel and hibernating. No comments about playing with my nuts thank you grin

lulubellaboozle Wed 05-Dec-12 10:10:24

whatdoes burping, eugh

artic hun, babe, sexi, what u doin? hows u? wanna chat? over and over again ..... yawn! seems to be the zenith of conversation for an unfortunately large amount of males on OD sites and in amongst the dross we all find little gems every now and then even they can turn out to get a bit tarnished too

voice stay around for Xmas, I think there are going to be lots of us who will need to commiserate and support each other when we are plastering on the smiles for family and kids and friends.

Has Bant been abducted? did he use all his condoms last night and is now tied up naked on a chair with chips stuck up his nose god knows why a scene from A Fish Called Wanda came to mind then?!

Yoga my counselling is free, but I will have to wait till after Christmas to start. It is offered through a local Domestic Abuse support unit and that includes emotional abuse too which my STBXH should run masterclasses in

WhatDoesTheDogSay Wed 05-Dec-12 10:35:48

48, yes, a catch indeed! It was actually quite boaky. You literally couldn't make this stuff up! He was a POFer, mind hmm... Where did you find Mr Fuck, by the way?

Ike, I know! I mean, we're all human, but at least make a bit of an effort mate! grin

Voice, understand where you're coming from re. reading about other people having fun dating when you're not. Particularly at this time of year. However, we posters are by no means having anything like success with OD! This thread is actually way more fun than the OD process itself (for me ATM anyway)!

KirstyWirsty Wed 05-Dec-12 10:50:55

I am totally dreading Christmas .. First one and my DD is spending Christmas Eve with her dad before being dropped to me in the morning as he heads to day shift

I've deleted my POF profile but am planning on hanging around .. C'mon voice stick around

48howdidthathappen Wed 05-Dec-12 10:59:27

whatdoes Met Mr Fuck on POF. Hadn't been on there for months. Was soooo bored one night went back on to do battle with the onslaught of 'huns'.
Got chatting the first night, met for a drink the next night. Spent a few days online/texting with him.
Then straight onto Coffee. I am a fast mover grin

48howdidthathappen Wed 05-Dec-12 11:09:35

He was only the 2nd man I met that I thought 'I would' grin

bantamrooster Wed 05-Dec-12 11:33:50

Morning all,

Artist was a lot calmer last night & this morning, didn't come across as quite so desperate to please (although she did still keep calling me babe, which makes Coffee more difficult when I'm trying not to laugh)

She's nice. The Coffee is good, yes, but once that's been done it's how much of a connection you have with someone that causes you to think do you want to spend more time with them - and while she's strange in a few ways, and I'm concerned about the condom thing, and she's very very into me it's worth seeing how things go. I'll keep control of the contraception though. I'm not going to go dumping someone because they're a bit different from my usual type, when my usual type obviously hasn't worked out in the past.

I really don't know whether I see this as a long term madly-in-love thing, but we get on and the sex is good - there isn't the butterflies that I felt for the Historian or SurreyGirl though - should I be looking for that or is it unrealistic?

Job interview lined up for next week, and another for this Friday. Yay me.

48howdidthathappen Wed 05-Dec-12 11:33:55

KW I wouldn't delete/block if I had an encounter with a complete twat(although I understand why people do). I would put my armour on, sit on his virtual shoulder, whispering in his ear. Fuck you! grin Hoping he would have to block me.Touche!

Movingforward123 Wed 05-Dec-12 11:38:10

Hi everyone smile

Well update for me I have now decided mr workaholic and I are over and finished for good! I havnt told him yet, but I will sit down and have a proper talk with him this time instead of leaving it open for him to come back! He is such a selfish arse!!!

On a happier note I may have a date lines up for this weekend with the next door neighbour guy! smilesmile

Movingforward123 Wed 05-Dec-12 11:42:58

voiceofunreason I think most of us on here feel crap being single around Xmas time! Sorry to hear your feeling unhappy sad

Yogagirl17 Wed 05-Dec-12 11:52:06

Bantam great news about the interviews! Good luck.

I'd want butterflies. But I think a lot of people on here will agree that butterflies only get you in trouble and at best are unnecessary, at worst should be avoided at all costs. If the Coffee is good and she's not sizing up your pets then yeah, why not. Might as well enjoy smile.

48howdidthathappen Wed 05-Dec-12 11:54:14

babe oops! bant If you are both having a good time together, why not just go with the flow?

WhatDoesTheDogSay Wed 05-Dec-12 11:59:39

48, that was a stroke of luck then smile! Must say that I've hardly even seen any photos on POF that make me think that I even potentially would. Although that's not to say that there would be a spark if I were to meet them in person. It's so tricky!

If I think of all the men I've ever been attracted to (in real life) I might not have looked twice at their profiles if they were on POF. I mean, looks-wise, I obviously thought they were hot, but that was because of the attraction to the person as a whole. I might not have looked at an anonymous photo of any one of them and thought that it was worth making contact. I know it's not just about photos/looks, and that what is written in a profile can swing one's opinion massively, but you just can't tell on-screen. And it's difficult for me to organise a date at all (my DC is very young) that to do so and find that I couldn't be less attracted to the man hardly seems worth it! confused

Voice please don't think that everyone here is having a wonderful time, with their Coffee, chats and offers. People tend to report in more when they have something going on and are obviously happy as it has often been a while for them and is confidence building and good to know they can. Yes it is a downer if its not happening for you.

It also depends what you want. Someone who has come out of a long term relationship is more likely to want to just try a few things out. Casual sex is easier than finding a possible life partner. I've been single for years though, have only ever had two second OL dates (both turned into more), and get very few suitable messages. I feel your pain.

I've noticed a few people getting quieter at the moment, maybe for similar reasons. I hope you do stay, otherwise the majority (and we are the majority) will be in hiding.

Everyone else, have one for me grin

WhatDoesTheDogSay Wed 05-Dec-12 12:01:52

*if I were to meet the ones I like the look of

48howdidthathappen Wed 05-Dec-12 12:09:11

whatdoes It wasn't until I met him that I thought 'I would'. That is when I had got over the shock of all 6'3 of him. I am only 5'2 so he towers over me.
Find his height a turn on now grin

Note to self. Read the profile!

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