DS2 (9) asked me why we never seem to have classmate X over to play and I answered him quite honestly - "because he is rude to me, doesn't do things I ask (like take muddy shoes off in house) and is nasty to you about your toys and the things you do"
The bit I didn't say to DS is that I also think he is a bad influence on him, because DS copies his way of talking an attitude 
Out of DS1(11)'s 'friends' I'm least keen on a child who comes to our house and proceeds to turn it upside down - nosing in drawers/ fiddling with stuff (models, toys, techo things) until he breaks them, and also has no respect for our home - jumps around on sofas/beds, and goudged a big scratch in our kitchen table with a paper clip 
.
In both cases the parents think their children are little darlings/angels. I wish I had the guts to be honest with them...
In the case of the table incident, I DID mention it and the mother just looked a bit crestfallen, and said, "Oh poor Y, I expect he didn't realise he was doing it..."
No apology or anything....
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Which of your child(ren)'s friends/classmates do you like least and why?
NormaSnorks · 28/08/2011 12:07
I generally don't enjoy having other people's children in the house as it seems that every time my DS's have their friends over something ends up getting damaged or broken! On two separate occasions we've had beds broken because someone else's child was jumping on it and broke one of the wooden slats, we've had countless toys broken because of other children having absolutely no respect for things, we had one of our Wii controls broken because a cross child threw it and it cost us £40 to replace! But I think the worst is when other people's children are rude or aggressive or just behave appallingly because it's harder to tell someone else's child off so it looks to your own kids like the behaviour is acceptable. My kids are by no means angels but the behaviour of some of their friends makes me thank my lucky stars that I have such lovely boys!
One child shouted across my dining room to me:
" whats this slop youve given me?" 
It was lasagne and i have checked with his lovely, gentle, funny mum that he liked lasagne prior to his visit!
bigun - - that reminds me of a friend/neighbour's little boy who had come round unexpectedly to play while she popped out. She was then late picking him up and I gave him and the DCs a toasted cheese and ham sandwich (proper cheddar, wholemeal bread and 'nice' ham 
... he peeled it open, peered at it, dropped it on his plate and said 'do you normally eat this stuff?'
vincent - it's not meant to be a 'nasty' thread, but I am just amazed by the behaviour of other people's children sometimes.
I know mine are no angels either, but I've spontaneously had comments from friends like 'DS1 is so polite, and he helped clear the table - can you get him to teach X how to do that?!'
or
'DS2 is a dream to have round - he can come anytime..'
My friends know that I would expect them to tell me if there had been any issues, and I genuinely believe they would.
Meanwhile the mother of DS2's friend X has commented to another friend that her son doesn't seem to get invited round much to other people's houses - surely the alarm bells ought to be ringing for her?
I'm a bit speechless by this thread, I don't know where to start....
So maybe I won't!!
I always say " oh your little Jimmy was a pleasure." even if it was very far from the truth.
I never trust what other parents say. They are probably being as polite as I am.
One of my friends often tells me about unsolicited praise she has received about her DD. Her DD is far from praiseworthy. A nice little girl but rude, messy etc etc.
I assume all children have good and bad points.
The only child I struggle with is one who asks things like "what car do you drive" "why dies your ds have to go to a state school"
I just keep reminding myself that she is repeating what she has heard. Not her fault.
Pag - yes - we know a child like that - "why don't you have a swimming pool....?" and even to DS2 "how much does your Dad earn?"
On a first visit I will usually give a child the benefit of the doubt, but if they are a bit of a pain in the ar$e/ rude etc EVERY time then they just won't get invited back again. Simple.
I guess I'm just saying that perhaps the mother of DS2's friend, who has commented that her son doesn't seem to get invited round much to other people's houses, should perhaps try to work out why??
Or should we all stop being so polite, and simply say, "your child behaved abominably, here's a bill for the broken bed, and having my table re-polished... oh, and he's never coming back, unless he learns to be more polite and respect other people's property..Bye!"
Would be much easier.
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Can I just ask you exercise a little caution in what you say to your children when you don't want a particular child to come and play.
One mother in our village decided she didn't like our ds. It turns out he wasn't the guilty party but that is not really relevant. She went on about it to her son and he repeated it to my ds.
This escalated to such a degree that my ds has now been diagnosed with mental health problems as a direct result of this boy repeating what his mother had said about my ds to my ds. The consequences are severe and far reaching.
I do not expect anyone to have anyone they don't like round to their house but please do be careful what you tell your dcs.
My ds in only 6 
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