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October 2011, the three C's crawling cruising and chatting

(954 Posts)
LittlePebble Tue 10-Jul-12 04:37:33

Thanks Mama for the title. A new thread hopefully everyone will find us again.

MummyDuckAndDuckling Wed 19-Sep-12 22:10:39
MummyDuckAndDuckling Wed 19-Sep-12 21:31:06

cupoftea's little Bea was the 16th and bb3s girls are tomorrow! I'll start new thread now and hopefully everyone can use it for birthdays. I just looked at the stats, so many people who started out didn't update much after that. Will post to fb group, hopefully everyone will see smile

MrsHende Wed 19-Sep-12 21:30:22

I just checked cup's thread and it was Beatrice's birthday on the 16th. I can't believe that the first of our October 11 babies is one. Still 7 weeks to go here but I'm already excited!

MrsHende Wed 19-Sep-12 21:20:15

Fell off too! Will catch up properly as soon as I can.

Have we had any first birthdays? When is cup's Beatrice's birthday? And BB3's twins?

LittlePebble Wed 19-Sep-12 06:52:59

Argh I fell off again blush

So much has been happening!

Bunt welcome back and well done for 11lbs (you've probably done a stone by now) I've been pondering the 5:2 diet but with going back to work / wedding planning etc I don't think I could cope with 500 calories a day. Luckily with all the stress/ running around I now weigh less than I did before I got pregnant although with a mummy tummy and my dress has had to be taken in grin

Cheshire oh I do understand you poor thing, it's so hard isn't it? I weep regularly at leaving E and I only have to leave him with my parents or DP's mum. I do think Engels is right though they develop faster with other children around. Think how advanced P will be!

Engels Eli was 76.5cm when he was last measured too (he's almost half my height now I'm only 160cm!!!) smile

Ed sorry things are so tough for you at the moment. Engels and Pene have given good advice. Take your time and only do what you feel is right in your heart, it's difficult with children involved but better to be happy apart than have your children grow up in an unhappy household. I would steer clear of ex though, if you do decide to leave DH and he thinks something has gone on it will make things acrimonious and as much as possible you want to stay friends.

Things in pebble land are manic. Back at work Monday Wednesday Friday which I'm struggling with. Not enough time at work to do the job, not enough time at home with my baby (bang go the home cooked meals etc) not enough time to run my own business and not enough time to plan the wedding...argh! DP had a tooth out yesterday so is in pain and off work today, E is coming down with a cold and has another tooth coming through and I seem to have picked up a chesty cough (but I don't get to stop as I have to look after the other two!)

DP (bless him) is a bit of a hypochondriac so last night wouldn't do anything to help me with tired and grizzly boy, he's kept me up half the night and is now worried that theres blood so is insisting on ringing the dentist at 8.30am of course there's blood you've had a bloody tooth removed AND BREATHE! grin

duck birthday thread sounds like a great idea smile

ed life sounds very complicated for you at the moment I think maybe you need to think about what YOU want and make a decision based on that although that's very easy for me to say and I can't imagine how hard it must be to actually do.

chesh I hate leaving W at nursery. He really does like the adults there and has fun with the other children but I'm not sure he enjoys it yet. He had a bad day today, he has a bit of cold and teeth were playing up, nursery gave him calpol and kept us updated all day, he was ok but not himself. As soon as we got him home you would never have known he was so happy and playing just like normal. Made me a bit sad that he gets sad there sometimes, hoping it will get better soon.

Penelope1980 Tue 18-Sep-12 10:09:32

Well, best of luck with whatever you decide smile

EdwardorEricCantDecide Tue 18-Sep-12 09:46:25

penelope that's exactly how I feel, that I've lost something I won't get back, however I feel that I owe it to him and the kids to try. At least to get Xmas out the way first so he can enjoy a Christmas with Mhairi.
Life gets so complicated as a grown up. Sigh smile

Penelope1980 Tue 18-Sep-12 08:43:01

Ed I think you just have to go with your gut. You can't rationalise or argue yourself into loving someone, so if you decide to stay, just make sure it's because you really want to, not because it seems like the right thing to do. That's my 2 cents anyway. Sometimes, after a bad patch, things can get better again and be awesome from then on as lessons are learned etc. BUT sometimes, during the course of a bad patch something can be lost that you never really get back. Guess it can go either way, so you have to trust in what your heart, not head, is telling you.

Sorry, am sure that's no help!

EdwardorEricCantDecide Mon 17-Sep-12 19:48:50

Oh and the reason I'm doubting myself since last night is because the past week or so DH has been really good but last night, DH started saying that he's been thinking back and he can see now that when e was depressed he was lashing out at me and putting me down to feel better about himself and that he can now see how that must have been soul destroying for me but that he admires my strength etc. one te one hand he's exactly right that is what's happened but I can't decide if he's saying that because
1. He's genuinely just realised what a prick he been as wants to change or
2. He's saying what he thinks I want to hear so I'll stay a bit longer or
3. He's always known what a prick he's been but has just realised he's not getting away with it anymore.

EdwardorEricCantDecide Mon 17-Sep-12 19:42:15

Aww cheahire I think I'd feel the same, not that I'd r worried about how well she was looked after just sad that I'd have missed some of her experiences iyswim.
Also can't wait to see all our babies birthday pics really doesn't feel like a whole year so we were waiting for them to turn up!
Re the ex, he's really just a distraction both he and I have discussed it and we know that although we are perfect for each other our circumstances are not, and I think if I were to split with DH ex and I would probably end up being FWB until he found someone to settle down with, as he wants a child of his own and I'm not prepared to have more so I know that's not seriously going to happen! It's really more of a comfort, fun thing as I can talk do easily to him as he's really just a big girl and he understands me in a way DH never has although I know a lot of that is purely because we grew up together an nothing more!
Up until last night I genuinely thought my ideal would be to be single with the kids possibly have a male friend when I needed one, but I really don't think my personality suits living with a man so if/when DH and I split I can't see me ever having a long term relationship anyway.
Sorry for epic post, couldn't really answer questions without explaining.

Engelsemama Mon 17-Sep-12 19:29:01

I would love to be complaining about DHs muffin top cheshire. Unfortunately he has a 7 month pregnancy belly which has been steadily growing for years. He's always going on about how he "used to go to the gym all the time". Yes darling, that's true, but it was before we met and we've known each other for SIX YEARS!

He's just got back from his first session so I am looking forward to the whining tomorrow grin

M was 76cm at his last hv appointment which was a few weeks ago. Tall Dutch DH!

I think sometimes it's hard sending them off for someone else to look after cheshire . I think it's been so good for M, especially since he's with babies who are all older than him, maybe that's why he's walking already - he's fed up of getting left behind!

CheshireDing Mon 17-Sep-12 19:21:52

Duck I need to start charting her height too, will try and remember this weekend. 71cm sounds very tall, when I look at it there is no way P can be that tall (need to measure the squirt at the weekend, she is asleep now).

TERRIBLE sleep (or lack of) last night from P Bunt. I am v impressed by your weight loss but that's a v small amount of calories per day, be careful <
hands Bunt chocolate in celebration > smile

Glad the counsellor is helping Ips, tbh I cannot imagine how anyone could go through what you and your DP have and not need to see someone to talk about Adam.

Engels DH joined the gym last year, he still has a muffin top < sigh > might put him on Bunts starvation diet grin

Ed I second what Engels said, better to have some space on your own really and THEN decide if you want to be with ex or DH. Would there be any harm in seeing a therapist? Might help you sort out your feelings a bit easier.

A new Birthday thread sounds good. I can't wait to see the photos of fb too.

This sounds a bit silly but DH rang nursery at lunch to ask how P was (as it's her first full day), they said she was fine and he text me to say so. I felt really sad even just reading the text though. When he collected her they said she had a good day/ate loads/had a sleep etc, got really angry this morning (prob tired/wondering where we were etc I guess) but I ended up crying reading her little book about her day. I feel so stupid, we have to go to work and nursery is lovely, I don't know why I feel so upset and crying again now. < goes off so DH can chuckle at me > boo hoo

Engelsemama Mon 17-Sep-12 18:41:39

ed You sound confused about what you want.

Please tell me to shove off if this advice is not welcome, but I feel like you need to try not to let what is happening between you and your ex affect your decision on how to proceed with DH. Don't see ex as a way out, though I do understand that sometimes when you feel that spark again it can be the push you need to realise that your current relationship isn't what you want anymore. I'm saying this as someone who has been in 3 serious relationships back to back over the last 13 years which have all <ahem> overlapped a bit.

If you really feel that walking away is the right thing for you to do, then do it for you, take some time to be yourself.

I felt the same about my ex. We'd been together so long and both changed so much (though obv a completely different situation) and at the end I also felt like I'd emotionally checked out. For me it was over and had been for a long time in my head, but he was still begging me tearfully to stay. In the end it was the right thing to do (walk away) but it took distance for me to be strong enough to do that (I went off travelling to S.America...where I ended up meeting DH).

It sounds like you really need some physical space.

duck a new birthday thread sounds like a good idea - this one's nearly full as it is!

EdwardorEricCantDecide Mon 17-Sep-12 17:12:18

In our discussions I mean.

EdwardorEricCantDecide Mon 17-Sep-12 17:04:38

duck no even more cliched lol it's an ex he's always been a v good friend but we've increased contact lately and probably crossed a line a cpl of times!

MummyDuckAndDuckling Mon 17-Sep-12 16:18:20

ed things sound tough. Is it someone else at work?

I was thinking, the first of our threads birthdays are soon, BB3 girls, should we start a new thread for that? I looked back and their birthdays are the 20th. Can't believe it!!!

EdwardorEricCantDecide Mon 17-Sep-12 15:36:58

hi everyone, i've not been on for a while and can't remember who said what so i'll catch up properly later at home in work skiving atm

my DH is doing the 5:2 diet after watching that programme and he's lost about 5 inches round the stomach and i think 8lbs shock he didnt have a lot to lose tbh. i keep saying i'm going to try but really dont know what i can eat as i've just had braces installed and i'm afraid salad would get caught round the wire. on a fasting day DH eats:
a 30g measured bowl of cereal in the morning a big salad bowl for lunch and a cup a soup with broken up breadstick in at night then he goes to bed really ealry to avoid temptation his days are monday and thursday.

i'm getting so excited about M's birthday and christmas grin

things are still "complicated" with me and DH not helped by the fact that i'm now having what i think might be considered an EA sadblush, i really dont know what i want at first i was certain that i definitely wanted to split with him, told him this then completely withdrew from the marriage emotionally, i think that drove it home to him that i'm serious so he seems to have turned a new leaf and is pushing for counselling, morally i want to give him another chance, but tbh i fell like i'm hoping it wont work confused i' now starting to think there's just been too much water under the bridge. so not sure how to proceed. also scared that a counsellor would see right through me and say that i'm quite clearly falling for someone else, --dont worry i know i'm being a total selfish cow i just cant see what/where to turn next atm

Engelsemama Mon 17-Sep-12 15:18:10

Whoop whoop! <does cartwheel>

DH has just signed up for the gym. I've been trying to get him to move his lazy arse do some exercise for the last 5 years.

Finally!

MummyDuckAndDuckling Mon 17-Sep-12 13:48:08

Oh and lots of tea helped me! I take literally a drop of milk, so not enough for it to add on any cals

MummyDuckAndDuckling Mon 17-Sep-12 13:47:01

That's great bunt. I stuck at it for 3 weeks and lost 4lbs but my head wasn't really in it at the time. I feel like I would manage it so much better if I was working and distracted, where as at home there is to much temptation!!
I was generally eating a boiled egg and maybe a few grilled turkey rashers around 12ish (80cal for egg and 2x rashers 55cal aprox) then about 6ish I'd make a big bowl of lettuce, cucumber, small tin tuna, some cheese, grated carrot etc. I got through it as I knew it was only 2 days a week, rather than careful eating every day. My fast days were Monday and either Wednesday or Thursday. Still ate very normal on other days. Really does work! Maybe once I'm over this cold, I'll try again.

ips glad to hear the therapy is going well and your enjoying N snuggles at night. S slept with me last night, was lovely grin

Engelsemama Mon 17-Sep-12 13:34:40

500 calories! shock

I've been trying to use MFP to keep track, but shock at 500! I don't think that's for me. Aren't you absolutely STARVING?!

I'm just trying (and trying being the operatvee word here) to cut out snacking, particularly in the evening and eat more veg/salad to bulk out my lunches/dinners. I've found skipping breakfast is the one thing to guarantee I'm reaching for the biscuit tin.

Also trying to get my trainers back on - runnung twice a week and shredding 2/3 times a week - to get myself moving about a bit more.

BuntCadger Mon 17-Sep-12 11:05:33

Ips glad the counsellor is helping. I can't imagine what it is I lose a chilld. X
Re night feeding, I remember whe ds2 hit around 12 months he was nursing again almost like a newborn. It was him putting in new milk order and it soon passed. It was exhausting at the time though.

The diet is called 5:2 and the video with dr Micheal Mosley is on YouTube. Basically for 2 days a week I restrict my calories to 500 (600 for men). I think there is a bit of leeway for nursing mums but I kept mine close to 500. I skip breakfast, have something like a leafy salad with egg for lunch and fish, new potato and veg for dinner. I don't do consecutive days and I eat normally on other days. Dh been doing it too. Has lots of health benefits, reducing risks for Alzheimer's, cancers and high cholesterol and also lose weight and inches.

ipswichwitch Mon 17-Sep-12 09:18:13

climbing I'm still seeing the counsellor and it's helping me loads. Made me realise my feelings are normal and learning to live with losing Adam rather than being overwhelmed by it iyswim.

Hope you've shifted that cold engels, we're still coughing/sneezing/snotting here! DP has been relegated to the spare room do I can cosleep with N as hes ramped up his night feeds again- mostly for comfort.

Will investigate eat fast live longer. I still have unwanted poundage that stubbornly refuses to go

Engelsemama Mon 17-Sep-12 08:13:52

Great to hear that being with N helps your DH ips. DH is the same. In fact I think I need to give him more time with M on his own at the weekends/just pop out, as usually he’s then full of beans when I get back telling how good M has been. He loves his daddy day with him on Thursdays. I went upstairs to bed yesterday for an hour as was feeling full of cold, so left DH to feed and entertain M.

<waves at bunt > Eatfast, live longer? I’m intrigued ( and still straining the seams of the size 14 jeans I bought when M was 2 months old). TRell me more!

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