HOW DO I GET OVER THIS FIGHT?

[heavenlysent]

OK I HAD THIS FIGHT WITH THIS GIRL AT MY OLD SCHOOL AND ALOTTA PEOPLE SAID I WON OTHERS SAID SHE WON BUT IM THE TYPE OF PERSON TNHAT LIKES TO WIN I CANT SEEM TO GET OVER IT BECAUSE IM AFRAID I MIGHT GET A REPUTATION THAT I CANT FIGHT AND I GOT MY BUTT BEAT AND STUFF AND PEOPLE MIGHT GET THE WRONG IDEA AND TRY TO START STUFF WITH ME BECAUSE THEY MAY THINK IM A PUNK BUT IM MORE CONCERNED ABOUT WHAT PEOPLE'LL THINK AND SAY...HOW DO I GET OVER IT AND GET PASSED IT AND WHAT OTHERS SAY?

[dizzydixies]

ignore them all and rise above it

[dividedself]

curious as to why you want a parent's pov on this

[NotABanana]

I would concentrate on growing up rather than bothering about what others think of you.

[VacantlyPretty]

Message withdrawn

[heavenlysent]

16

[heavenlysent]

17 soon

[claricebeansmum]

You also need to concentrate on your English...

[heavenlysent]

and please if your not going to give an positive opinion wheter than asking why i want a parents pov...or concentrate on growing up dont send nothing at all...because you never know what a persons been through or came from your not in my position so negativity shouldnt even be a factor when your giving advice...i could be the nicest person but everybody has another side to them....please and thank u?

[heavenlysent]

not just mom....why did u even comment on it then..oh please my ass

[heavenlysent]

its different when you hear it from other parents rather than your own because im the type who'll listen to everyone else but not my parents

[DeeRiguer]

ffs grow up
& keep yer fists to yerself
please and thank you

[heavenlysent]

notjust mom....thank u for that

[WanderingTrolley]

fgs are you the cowardly lion?

Don't fight. Walk away. Act upon that advice any time now you see fit.

[Lauriefairycake]

as you grow up you will learn not to worry what others think of you

the point is to like yourself, not give a monkeys what others think

get over it by improving your own life, an old italian proverb is "the best revenge is living well" - try that

[heavenlysent]

because when people give a negative response its really not doing me any good but putting me down when im trying to learn theres more to life ...instead of telling me how to overcome it its just adding fuel to the fire.

[heavenlysent]

thanks lauriefairycake

[heavenlysent]

ok notjustmom

[heavenlysent]

its way easier said than done...what do i say to the ones who come up to me and say things like..."i heard you won the fight, well, i heard you lost, you got beat up, you cant fight"... im not a person to start a fight with anybody, im the peace maker if anything,i like to help the kids that get picked on all the time, and i never start fights with anyone, but i was caught up in some 'he say, she say' when i had no idea what the girl was talking about...just needful of some mature advice

[sue1911]

Your message could easily have been written by my step daughter 2 yrs ago.

You sound like you have no one to turn to and although this is a site for mums i think others have to remember that with mums come kids and at least you have tried to get an adult perspective on this.

okay now for the lecture bit. My SD got into a lot of fights at her school and outside of it. Most of the time, like you, she was sticking up for her frinds and whilst that is commendable there comes a time when you have to realise that YOUR reputation is more important. if you are not careful you will be labelled a trouble maker and that could cause you more problems after you have left school as perspective employers get school reports.

As for what people say and think, try to remember that

1. they do not walk in your shoes and therefore have no right to judge you.

1. if you worry about what people think then you are allowing their judgement to cloud over yours.

1. for every action there is a reaction and reactions usually have consequences. Be sure you are prepared to deal with the concequences before taking action.

1. Everyone is entitled to THEIR opinion, you dont have to take it on board and make it yours.

It doesnt matter who won the fight, that is the past and you cannot change it no matter how many times you re-run it in your mind. what is more important is that it shouldnt happen again now that you are almost an adult and will be leaving the children behind. look to the future because that you do have control over

good luck with the next few years of changing from a girl into a woman.

[Remotew]

You are nearly 17 and should be leaving the playground mentality behind, believe me I had a terrible time at school with girls and playground arguments that I left at the first opportunity and went to college. It was so great not to have to see these small minded, mean people again day in day out. Their opinion does not matter then.

The girls at college were far nicer and everyone felt and acted so grown up compared to school.

Try to mix in different circles to people with such attitudes. Remember that once you reach 18 you are an adult in the eyes of the law and could end up with a criminal record if you dont forget this fighting business as any physical attack is assault.

Good luck.