God please someone help me

[MadMommaMemoo]

I am goin into full on melt down. I can feel it building up in me. Crisis team just phgoned. Waiting for urgent appointment with consultant. scared Im going to end up back in hosptial and am managing to convince myself I have schizophrenia (sp?)

Can hear voices in the house, people outside the house. DH just gone out to get some shopping.

Please help me, I am desperate for this to stop, so sorry fi I come across all needy. I am fucking desperate though


please please please

[Marne]

Is anyone with you? how long will dh be?

Keep your mind busy (by talking on here) or by playing a game (sometimes works for me) until dh gets back.

[Marne]

Hope your dh is back soon and hope all is ok?

[BarryShitpeas]

Hope you are ok

[weegiemum]

MMM are your crisis team coming to see you today? Are you already on medication for your symptoms? You're not schizophrenic if you know the voices aren't real!

I get similar symptoms and its down to severe depression.

I have to go cos there is someone at the door, I willl chck back soon!

[MadMommaMemoo]

Dh will be back soon.

I do know the voices aren't real, I'm just really frightened.

Someone from crisis is going to phone me back some time today and tell me what happens next.

Just had to come and get in bed. Dosed myself up on Diazepam so hoping I can sleep for a bit, otherwise I can't deal with it.

Why do I get these urges to hurt myself. I don't want to die. But I feel like I want to scratch my face off or burn myself.

[smellsofsick]

Hang on in there mmm. You will get help and well done for phoning the crisis team. Have they phoned back yet?

[MadMommaMemoo]

No call yet.

I dont think I locked the front door but can't go down and do because I'm scared. Im scared somebody is going to come in.

[weegiemum]

MMM just stay where you are. How much diazepam have you had?

The urges, everything - could be me writing this, beleive me, I am seeing my psychiatrist on Thursday for very similar reasons . My "emergency" appointment which came down from 9 weeks to 4 weeks with a lot of persuasion

You will be OK. Coming on mn and talking here is a really good way of making sure you are ok.

Please don't downplay the symptoms when you speak to the crisis team, this is a crisis, you need seen asap.

[MadMommaMemoo]

Sorry have been sleeping for a bit. Still feel like crap and struggling to hold it together.

Weegie, that's a joke that you have had to wait all that time. Absolutely shocking! I hope you get some help on Thursday, let us know how you get on.

Crisis team phoned. My Cpn is away so they are going to assign me to somebody else who is going to phone in the morning. He is hopeful that I will be seen sometime this week but I'm not holding my breath.

[weegiemum]

This week - what a joke!

Hope you get some rest and feel a bit better until you get seen soon.

xx

[Stac2011]

MMM is your dh home? Its crap feeling like that. I thought i was schizophrenic but it was my anxiety making me think like that. I hope you get a quick appointment.

Weegiemum hope you get help on thursday

[MadMommaMemoo]

Dh is home. I am lying in bed listening to him trying to get dinner organised for 3 dc. It sounds like total chaos, I should feel sorry for him but I don't!

I'm hoping it's just anxiety too. Am googling far too much and gave diagnosed myself with bi-polar, schizophrenia, BPD, the works! Oh and I think I have cervical cancer too!

On a plus point Diazepam has really helped

[Stac2011]

the diazepam usually works great MMM. Google is a curse, frightens more than helps. Think our minds are good at making us believe what we read. Dont feel guilty for dh tending to the kids he only wants to help you feel better x

[MadMommaMemoo]

I definitely need to stay away from google! I'm always telling people not to google but never take my own advice.

Do you find you ate exhausted when you have been so anxious? I could sleep for a week.

[MadMommaMemoo]

That should obviously be are not ate.

[Becaroooo]

Stay away from the google MMM!!

I once convinced myself I had the plague

Dont feel guilty, they are his kids too, he should be ok to get them their dinner!

Really hope you feel better tomorrow x

[FourFortyFour]

Memoo - sorry I have only just seen this. I have been in a similar position to this so if any time you want to talk, you know where I am.

[Stac2011]

yeah mmm alway totally shattered when I have been anxious, its as if the steam eventually runs out. Reat as much as you can x

[weegiemum]

Mind you I self-diagnosed with BPD on Google, took it in to my psychiatrist and she just looked at me and said "Why didn't I se it!!" and now I get more of th help I need. I'm classic, and having the diagnosis really hlps as I can xplain all my eccentricitis and bad behaviour - not that it absolves me of it, but it does give me a rason and something to work towards!

[MrsChufftheMuff]

Aww memoo!
My beta blockers made me hallucinate like fuck, both seeing and hear things, for about a month

I do wonder if your meds need tweaking

But I do know that hallucinating (especially haering voices) is actually fairly common with depression. I think that people don't always admit to it though.

Would you be able to have a look at //www.moodgym.anu.edu.au/welcomeMoodgym

It has helped me massively.
Diazepam is bloody brilliant though.

[MrsChufftheMuff]

bah stupid linky gone wrong


//www.moodgym.anu.edu.au/welcome

[MrsChufftheMuff]

plus I am about too much most of the time so pm me if you like

[MadMommaMemoo]

I do think they need tweaking too. They're not working at all and I'm just getting worse. Will go and have a look at that link, thanks