Mumsnet Talk

Its true, NGCECOAWT, so the BESH move on.

Join us in spooky October, for a different sort of Pagen fun. Sod the lentil weaving and organic bean bags, we're channelling pointy black hats, green tinged foundation and probably a bit of Harry Potter.

Join us for cursing of the insta-diffs, moments of pure love and the horrors of the cam of the fanjo - post the Beshtionnaire and the coven will judge you.

This is not a woo thread (TINAWT)

<Draws wonky pentagram on floor>

And a spooky name change.

Spooky.

Woo :D

Boo!

<hangs a monkey's paw on the door>

How about ArielTheEvilWitchFromHell?

Too much?

ArielDaughterOfRocky? Still have massive swollen minging eyes.

ArielTheBarrenOldBag? (just attention seeking now)

Fab OP sinky, I'm never witty enough!

Yes, sorry forgott that bit. Fab op!

<Treads on wonky pentagram, making it wonkier>

How do I namechange?

This should really be on TWTOWNGC (The Woo Thread Of Which No Good Came) but I went to see a new acu lady this morning. I liked her. Even if she has banned me from eating spicy food.

And Droid is finally calming down a bit. Which is good. I was beginning to worry I would have no blood left!

Ooooooohhh! Morning all! <sticks on pointy hat and pouts pumpkin juice>

Accio BFPs!

Nice Fred title Sinks <dons pointy hat>

This could be the Fred that I start my IVF.

<passes Rie cucumber soaked eye mask>

Nice Fred title Sinks <dons pointy hat>

This could be the Fred that I start my IVF.

<passes Rie cucumber soaked eye mask>

Excellent fred start, sinks. Has the peacock feather cabbage hat skirt thing finally been retired? <hopeful>

<stirs cauldron with an ancient pissed-on stick> Soup, anyone?

A fred to match my mood. Horrah!! Well done sinks.

I have returned from a weekend at Centreparcs with a load of vodka drinking, cake making women who were all luffly except the twat who calls herself my friend who was very rude to me on Saturday to make herself look better. There were 2 differs on the trip, one instadiffer who managed it on her honeymoon and another who scoffed at me when i offered her a hot water and lemon as she felt sick because it was 'morning sickness' and I clearly have no idea what that is. Stuck up bitch.

How is everyone doing today?

What a stupid cow! <performs evil spell to give her hyperemesis>

I'm doing ok. Have left work early, absolutely shattered and full of headache. Going home for soup and a novel about a witch! What excellent timing.

northey I quite possibly luff you.

When are you coming near me for a meet up? <stern>

Bitch!

(Bugger's friend obv)

As soon as either work says I need to, or I can persuade them I do!

What did the other bitch do?

And how are your eyes, piraticalwitch?

Terrible thanks! <cheerful> I want to scratch them out, but I don't think that would be useful in the long run. Doc's tomorrow to demand she does something.

What has caused it? It sounds horrid

Are you feeling any less awful about Christmas and cold houses and shit?

Some random allergen. Will ask the GP if she thinks I could do with an epipen. I don't want to to be miles from anywhere and it happen again.

Slightly less awful thank you. MrA has not mentioned Christmas again as I think he is scared I need him to sort it all out (though why on earth shouldn't he?)

What's your witch novel?

I've only just started it and can't remember the title, but it's a Philippa Gregory one. A young nun has just fled her convent and been taken in by the local wise woman. I think she's going to end up married to the local wicked Lord or something. And be a secret witch.

<pokes head round door, hands round glasses of Plymouth gin and smoked salmon blinis, has a sneaky grope and chucks Benedict Cumberbatch into Pit>

Is it "A Discovery of Witches"?