I feel so sorry for my nearly 4 year old dd2

[Enid]

as she is the friendliest child in the world - in fact a bit TOO friendly. She is obsessed with having friends and is so chatty and in your face that I think she gets on people's nerves - her constant chatting certainly irritates me at times.

She only has to meet a little girl once and thats it, they are her best friend, she draws them pictures and smuggles toys out to give to them.

Yesterday a little girl in the reception class at dd1's school refused to play with her (there is a small park next to dd1's school where all the kids go) and she was so devasted I have never heard her cry like it.

I don't know why I have bothered to post this really as I haven't really got ot the bottom of why it is such a big deal.

She told dh that it was all OK as another girl had said 'dd2, I will be your friend, come and play with me' (this wasn't true though )

We've had a few problems with nursery as it is attached to a private prep and the majority of children go there after the nursery and the mothers don't seem to include dd2 in playdates presumably as she is going to the state primary.

This is all so different to dd1 who isn't in the least bothered about friends and is so passive and of course this has made her massively popular.

[expatinscotland]

Can she move to the nursery attached to the primary where she will go?

Or is there another private nursery where she can go that doesn't accept calves?

[Enid]

its very hard round here expat

there are only three other nurseries

one is another private prep
two others only do 9-12 which was no good when I was working and now one is full and one is horrible)

[Enid]

the primary takes kids from all three nurseries plus varoius odd ones in various villages

[expatinscotland]

Since you're off just now, could she move to the 9-12 one for the time being?

Cuz those moos at that other nursery, I wouldn't want my child befriending saddos-in-the-making like that, anyway.

[PinkTulips]

enid, i've no helpful advice i'm afraid. hopefully a child will come along who's as friendly as her and they'll hit it off. then you'll have 2 of them annoying you

it sad but i can sort of see my dd having the same problem, she much younger but has never gone through a shy faze, is super friendly and chatty and runs up to people with a big grin and a hallo and starts babbling at them. unfortunately 90% of the time people (adults and kids) blank her or walk off and you can see the hurt on her face. it breaks my heart. i just hope it doesn't change her personality as shes so bubbly and outgoing.

[Enid]

the nice one is full

and the other one is not very nice and anyway most kids from there go to a completely different state primary

[TinyGang]

No advice really but it twists your heart to watch them learning these painful lessons doesn't it?

From 4 onwards they have to get the hang of this making friends palavar and all you can do is watch and mop them up and be on hand with a cuddle if it goes wrong.

I hate it - want to march over and make un-cooperative kid be nice to my child.

[Enid]

pink tulips yes I have had that a LOT with dd2

heartbreaking isnt it

[PcCOD]

agree miove nurserys

[lucycat]

Is this an ongoing problem enid, or just a one off?

could the other child be having an off day/moment?

[PcCOD]

the best friend hting wiht girls is unique to girls ime
boys dotn "fall in love" like girls do
none of the dsses have a best mate - just a gang of dogs they run around wiht

[PinkTulips]

i feel like screaming at people sometimes..... she just doesn't understand why they won't even say hello

crap, now i'm all teary, damn hormones

[Enid]

do you know what the other kid was doing?

watching a fecking poratable dvd player on the bench ffs

I felt like smashing it

[expatinscotland]

Get her on the wait list for the other nursery.

You can always decline the place if it's offered and your circumstances change.

Doesn't hurt to get on it, though.

[Enid]

yes unique to girls

but what makes us such good mates when we get older so worth encouraging IMO

[alexsmum]

i had this with ds1 when he was small-about 2-3. he would run up to kids and go" helloi'm alex" and it would just freak them out. i remember him doing it on holiday once and the kid punching him in the face.
he's 6 now and really popular at school -gets invited to all the birthday parties etc.
it does get better i promise.

[PcCOD]

oh enid she is a tosser
watching tv att he park?
nobbo
gonad clap and chant "you are a nobyou are a nob" aorund her

[PcCOD]

oh enid she is a tosser
watching tv att he park?
nobbo
gonad clap and chant "you are a nobyou are a nob" aorund her

[Enid]

She is on the list

there may be a place next term but I am supposed to go back to work then

[expatinscotland]

The kid had a portable DVD player at nursery?

WTF?

No, sorry, nursery is for them to play, not sit on their a*se watching TV!

[PcCOD]

go and cry att hem!!
it always works
go onow when you look so saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad

[Enid]

alexsmum

sorry but that made me pmsl

your poor little boy

I can just see that happening to dd2 though

[PinkTulips]

at the dvd player. what happened to playing at the park?

[expatinscotland]

I agree, cod, what sort of a nob of a parent gives their friggin' 4-year-old a portable DVD player to take to the park/nursery?

That's the most pitiful thing I've read all morning.

[Enid]

she had a dvd player in the park next to dd1s school

she had got it out of the car and was watching it on a bench and dd2 wantetd to watch and they said no

I did laugh heartily in the car with dd1 and dd2 'my lord what a silly thing to do, to watch a dvd IN THE PARK whne there is all that running aroudn to do' etc etc etc