EspressoMonkey
Sun 20-Jan-13 09:30:27
First of all, sorry, long story and first world problem.
DH, DCs and i live abroad for DH's job. We live in a rented house close to DH's work as it is not really easy for foreigners to buy property where he works. I miss England and our lovely home there, so last year DH bought me a Ski Chalet as a birthday present / thank you for leaving your family and job in England to follow me around the world, present. He insisted it was my chalet, i could decorate it how i wanted etc, do what i wanted with it.
The chalet is in a fabulous ski resort and to me it is very much our home. We spend most weekends there, we do not rent it out as a holiday chalet.
Last year MIL asked whether HSIL and her uni flat mates could visit for a weeks snowboarding holiday. I was reluctant to agree. DH's does not really know his HSis and when she has visited us in other homes she has been very messy (straightens hair over sink leaving behind lots of hair etc etc) and she never helps out at all. Reluctantly i agreed, MIL insisted her friends were nice and they would help out and babysit DCs in exchange for free board.
HSIL and her friends booked plane tickets which meant they landed late at night with no way of getting to the chalet so DH drove a 6 hour round trip to collect them from the airport.
They have been here all week and as i guessed, have been hard work. They have done nothing to help out around the house, not bothered to help with dinner or clean away afterwards, not helped with DCs or bothed to even buy me a bunch if flowers or some chocs to say thank you for having them. We all eat together but they talk amongst themselves and make little conversation.
On Wednesday DH was called back to work with a crisis, leaving DCs, myself and HSIL and her friends. Since then they have been worse, going out at night and getting drunk and returning at 2/3am and waking DCs and i with their noise. Last night things worsened. DCs and i were woken at 3am, i could hear male voices and smelt cigarette smoke. Our house is strictly non smoking, especially as we have a baby. I went into the lounge and interrupted the party. I asked the young men to stop smoking in my home and to please leave as i didn't know who they were. The young men were local lads and were very apologetic for smoking and waking us and explained they didn't know it was a private home. As they left one of HSIL's friends, under her breath, called me a snotty cow. I turned around and politely challeneged her on her comment. She repeated it and called me an old hag too (34 BTW, she is 20).
I went back to bed fuming and in tears. This morning i woke them all up at 8.00am. They are due to fly back home tonight and i assume were expecting DH or me to take them to the airport. I explained that because DH was not here and because we had had a lot of snow lately and the minibus was snowed in, they could make their own way back to the airport via public transport. I was not driving them 6 hours round trip. They had 12 hours to get back to the airport themselves. The journey is a bus and two train rides and takes a total of 3.5 / 4 hours. An hour later i heard the door bang and went to their rooms. They have left and take all their stuff. They have not said good bye. The room where the two girls were sleeping has been trashed. Make up; lipstick, foundation and other stuff has been smeared into my beautiful new White Company bed sheets. It doesn't look like an accident as it is on all the pillows, duvet and sheet.
I phoned DH at work and told him what had happened. It was a broken line and DH was v. busy at work so i know he wasn't really aware of the whole story as it was hardto talk. But he questioned whether i had checked they had money to get to the airport and whether the trains were running. I hadn't. I have checked since and the trains are running. But have i done the right thing? AIBU?
RealAleandOpenFires
Sun 21-Apr-13 02:41:25
Sorry if I'm late to the thread. 
(The following depends if your DP is friendly with a Solicitor or two in his line of work & who is willing to fire off a few letters for the price of a fine home cooked UK* meal or two.)
OP...accidently let slip to your Dmil, that you are thinking of seeking payment for all damages et ectera from Hsis, in court of your current country of residence AND it'll not look good, when she (Hsis) & friends would have to declare criminal convictions for certain jobs.
Also Dmil would/might(?) also be liable as she "stood guarrantor(sp?)" for Hsis & her friends "good standing in the community".
Then sit back and see what happens, because:-
1) Hsis will cough up all of the money herself.
2) She'll gladly supply the names & addresses of her Uni. friends to "lessen her guilt" of the whole affair.
3) Hsis will (try to) ignore the whole thing.
4) It will cost Hsis & friends a lot of money to try and defend themselves in court plus hotel costs.
5) The Uni. itself would take a dim view of current students...being possibly convicted of stealing, damaging private property & lieing. As IT would look bad on the Uni.
(Also a written & signed statments from both Ski Instructors would help aswell)
*I'm assuming that you're both from the UK? 
MrsKoala
Mon 04-Mar-13 17:23:08
oh sorry. i got confused. but as Lueji says, every single time i ever saw hsil again i would have to say something.
Lueji
Mon 04-Mar-13 17:21:31
Ups, sorry.
Got carried away there.
Lueji
Mon 04-Mar-13 17:21:10
when Sil rang did you ask her for the money she owes you?
^This.
At her every attempt to speak, you'd ask," when are you going to pay me the damages?"
ChippyMinton
Mon 04-Mar-13 17:19:40
Mrs Koala - SIL is nice, it's HSIL (half-sister) who is the villain of the piece. I think.
MrsKoala
Mon 04-Mar-13 17:17:17
when Sil rang did you ask her for the money she owes you?
do you think big barry had a case of mistaken identity and realised mil wasn't the lotto winner he saw in take a break?
ChippyMinton
Mon 04-Mar-13 16:56:45
ooh, I've missed lots of updates <puts kettle on>
espresso I think I love you.
Thank you for this tiny glimpse into a world of which I know naught.
perfectly wonderful
QOD
Mon 04-Mar-13 16:45:24
Yeah we wanna know what the investigator turned up and why?! G'wan tell
Gruffalump
Mon 04-Mar-13 12:46:44
Best thread ever!!
Did the investigations yield anything!?!?
EspressoMonkey
Mon 04-Mar-13 12:12:48
Sorry, had to retire from thread through fear that the investigator would find out i had been posting on Mumsnet about Barry .
Barry situation is over, SIL rang on Sunday to let us know that Big Barry had unexpectedly called time on his relationship with MIL. (Unexpectedly???)
MIL is upset, apparently she and Big Barry were planning an Easter break and MIL had bought an Easter egg with Baby Barry's name written on in chocolate. If MIL rings and has a moan i feel like reminding her the wasted Easter egg could not have cost as much as my wasted champers and bedding!
Barry was a baby and not a mature gentleman.
GinOnTwoWheels
Fri 01-Mar-13 06:11:55
OP - So does that mean that Big Barry and your DH are approximately the same age? Ewwww!
Perhaps he will tire of the relationship when people keep assuming that MIL is his mum, not his girlfriend?
PurpleCrazyHorse
Thu 28-Feb-13 20:59:27
OMG, that was the best 20 mins of my life (sorry OP). All 22 pages of it 
Very envious of your chalet but you definitely did the right thing kicking them out to make their own way home and how lovely the ski instructors said sorry. Glad you've not discovered anything really precious broken or damaged, at least bedding and champers can be replaced.
Snorted at the thought of HSIL + Big Barry snogging the sauna while your MIL is left (literally) holding the baby Barry!
fertilityagogo
Thu 28-Feb-13 19:57:58
Espresso will you come back at some point and update us?
Pleeeeeeease.....?
(You couldn't make this stuff up)
Wow! What a colourful life you lead OP! Barry son and father has made me laugh out loud.
I have no doubt the dreadful behaviour by HSIL is now completely rewritten with her somehow as the victim. I am sorry the ski instructors have left the
series vicinity. I think they could perhaps be included in the sauna scene with Mil and Barry and Barry?
The thread that keeps giving
RiffyWammal
Thu 28-Feb-13 09:42:10
Did anyone see Child Of Our Time last night? There was a dad called Barry and a baby called Little Barry! 
RiffyWammal
Wed 27-Feb-13 14:51:52
LOVE this thread and the update! OP you sound great and you've handled all this very graciously and tactfully.
I'm imagining Barry as Barry Scott of Cillit Bang fame. He could have been useful at the chalet after HSIL's visit - BANG and the foundation is gone! Vomit in the pool? BANG it's gone!
WhatKindofFool
Tue 26-Feb-13 14:19:59
OnwardBound Did you not see the bit where it explains that he won XFactor a few years ago? 
OnwardBound
Tue 26-Feb-13 12:58:37
KenDodds
I am also wondering why OPs DH is having Big Bad Barry investigated?
Does he think Barry is dating Mum to get to him somehow, being keen to get to know DH as it were?
What does your DH do OP? Is he someone important - a celebrity, media mogul, billionaire, Mafia boss?
The plot thickens!
