To not feel rich even though husband earns £250k a year

(760 Posts)
whoovian Mon 07-Jan-13 09:34:03

I don't feel rich - I scarcely feel comfortable on this level of income.

Why is that - I grew up in a very poor family (not enough food at times type of poor) so I know what poverty feels like.

We are not extravagent spenders - we have one 1 week european holiday a year, no savings however we do have 4 children in private school(!) and live in London.

I feel unreasonable when I consider how little income others survive on but what do you think?

SirCliffRichardSucksEggsInHell Wed 09-Jan-13 10:44:52

750! Woo hoo.

I think I'm poorer than my parents, despite both of us working and she had 6 kids to feed, I only have 2. Wages just aren't high enough to pay the bills these days. Everything has gone up but our salaries haven't. Dh took a major pay cut 3 years ago (either that or be made redundant) and we're still paying the price for that. He's applied for countless other jobs but hasn't even had a reply to his applications.
I work for myself after around 6 months of filling in applications for jobs I was qualified to do and not hearing a dickie bird. So I started to work for myself but progress is slow and I'm constantly being asked to work harder for less money, which I do because that's better than the client going elsewhere and me losing work.

I wonder if my kids will look back at their childhoods with as much resentment as people here that they didn't have enough? I'd like to think they were happy and we provided for them but judging by some of these posts, they may well end up completely dissatisfied when they are older.

You can't win can you?

SirCliffRichardSucksEggsInHell Wed 09-Jan-13 10:45:59

Dammit abit

I'll just have to settle for 751 and 752

Imaginethat Wed 09-Jan-13 10:52:43

My happiest friends are not necessarily my richest friends, they are the ones who maintain good relationships, who understand that to give is to receive, and who take time for and appreciate simple pleasures such as stories with their children and coffee with a good friend.

Having said that, I do have family and friends who are very well off and also very happy. I guess they have worked out what's important to them as well as how to obtain material possessions.

picketywick Wed 09-Jan-13 11:19:24

Is it a wind up?

justmyview Wed 09-Jan-13 12:09:20

I once read that the majority of people think that they would be satisfied with 10% higher earnings. This is apparently quite healthy - since 10% higher is within reach, it can help us to remain motivated, but in the meantime, we don't feel like a failure

ouryve Wed 09-Jan-13 12:38:24

I think you have a point there with the longing, LaQueen. I've worked out that after the non-negotiable living costs (and for the OP, it's clear that living in London and private schooling are non-negotiable), we have pretty much the same left over at the end of the year as she does. If I decide I want new boots, I will spend a few weeks shopping around and trying on (sometimes I don't actually find anything I like that fits, which adds to the longing!) If in the end, a £200 pair and a £70 pair were equally good, I could comfortably buy either, but I'd probably buy the £70 pair from somewhere where I'd seen them for £50. I also tend to go for practicality rather than a label, even though I could go for the label. (My £70 waterproof, wool lined Reiker boots are far better in every way from Uggs, which would cost at least twice as much)

That element of wanting something and choosing the one that's best on price and practicality makes it much more of a treat, which gives me a bit of a lift from the mundanity of life. If I could just walk in and buy a pair of everything, I doubt I'd find it much of a treat.

ouryve Wed 09-Jan-13 12:40:27

than Uggs.

Syntax fail.

Peachy Thu 10-Jan-13 09:24:22

I don;t know that OP doesn't give even if not to charity- that £85k a year on education might just be the few quid in LEA spending that allows ds4 to get his statement funded. It may not be couched in those terms in her ehad, but in reality.... (I know there are plenty of other arguments against private education, just addressing the bottom line here).

I also see point about longing: DH's main income comes in every 3 months, so we have learned to wait and plan for needs and wants; the £20 Ebay coat I ordered last week after saving for felt like a massive treat, because I couldn't afford it for ages, but when the TV blew up this week, the week the money came in, running out and replacing it (albeit with a half price cheap brand one in the sales- result!) felt less so. The brain is a complex thing.

If I had this money I'd absolutely look at private; it's a short term expense in the big scheme of things and if it was followed by putting that amount into savings / pension for a while would be balanced.

Sluggy6962 Fri 11-Jan-13 12:10:28

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

ssd Fri 11-Jan-13 19:31:57

jesus I get NMW and I give to barnardos every month

sort yourself out op

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