Mumsnet Talk

Am silently fuming as DH has converted our garage into his 'studio' and refuses to give me a key. It has been about a year now and I didn't think much of it first, we agreed it was his place to work, is filled with his things and I had no desire to go in there.
However it has been dawning on me that I don't like being locked out of part of my house. There have been occasions when I wanted to access things (like blank DVDs or paint brushes) and couldn't get them.

I do go in there with him but I have asked for a key, several times over the last few months and he says I don't need one, it is just his stuff, he doesn't want me in there going through things etc.

If he had just given me one first I would have no interest but now it has become this big issue and his refusal is making me want to go through it (which is not like me, I know he has porn there & I don't mind, but he knows I know this so must be something else right?)

So AIBU to want a key, surely if he had nothing to hide he would just give me one?

YANBU, it's your house too.

Does seem a bit odd, why isn't the key just left in a safe place in the house?

People with nothing to hide, don't hide things

YANBU, i would change the locks when he was out.

YANBU. Do you think he does have something to hide (what? what?) or is it some horrid controlly messing with your head on purpose thing? I'd go insane not having access to part of my home.

YABU because you say you want to go through his stuff, he's allowed his privacy and as you admit he can't trust you he has to protect it with a lock.

He always keeps the key on his keychain and with him. It is odd isn't it....

There's got to be a reason he doesn't want you in there
Does he keep the keys on him?
Very wired

Wtf? I'd be tempted to put a lock on the bedroom door and tell him it was my "private space".

Yes, it is very odd.

That's weird. Like, serial killer weird

He has something to hide or you would have access.

I would ask for key one more time then if he refused I would get a locksmith to open door.

It is both your house so this is not acceptable whatsoever & sounds pretty dodgy.

It's odd that he keeps a key on his keychain?

Do you jointly own/rent the house?

It does seem very odd, and I'm not sure I'd be at all comfortable with it. My thoughts would be it's either a control thing, or he is hiding something. And if he knows you know about the porn, it has to be something worse. And that's worrying.

What GreenyEyes said.

Not just weird. Sinister.

I wouldn't be happy with it . It's the secrecy. Not the fatct that he wants private space for his own stuff.

There are quite obviously bodies in there...

What shrimp said.

My dh has private stuff, it's in our room and i wouldn't look in/at it, he wouldn't feel the need to lock it away.

It's really very strange behaviour.

I'd feel the same. Its part of your house and keeping you locked out is just plain weird.

Fredfred- really? I think the lock came before the want to go through his stuff.

There's no need what so ever for a lock that you have no access to. Had this been a new thing, I would have said wait 6 weeks and see what happens/appears at Christmas, but as its a long term thing then no YANBU.

Yup, weird. I would have broken in by now.