To expect the Local Authority to address letters to 'Dear Parent(s)/Guardian(s)'?

[SurreyDad]

AIBU to expect my local aithority to address the letter with the result of a school application with 'Dear Parent(s)/Guardian(s)', rather than Dear Mrd xxxxxx? Is it not discrimination, or non inclusive to only write to one parent?

[FabbyChic]

is it not sunny where you are? have you nothing better to do than moan?

so you want it addressed to mr and mrs, what about single parents?

[SurreyDad]

Hence why the 's' of Parent(s) is in brackets... Or should the bank manager of our joint mortgage only write to the male of a married couple?

[LIZS]

Aren't you rather overthinking this ?

[DramaInPyjamas]

tbh I am not bothered what is addressed to who, it's the letter that's important.
yabu, and fussy.

[SurreyDad]

What if the Mrs isn't home for ages - the letter would just lie sitting there not being opened if it was just addressed to her. What if they pass this information on to the school and the school ends up only communicating with one parent?

[usualsuspect]

well surely if you know who the letters from ,either of you could open it

[hairfullofsnakes]

Don't know why you are getting such a hard time about this on here op, if this is something that bothers you then speak to whomever it concerns? I don't think yabu

[SurreyDad]

The form wasn't signed - it was done electonically, and they do not provide a field to allow you to put such things on. And I do not think it appropriate to open letters addressed to others - what if the letter was from the authority but about a completely separate matter?

[SurreyDad]

Thank you, snakes. They go on about men not being involved - what do they expect if they do not communicate with them?

[SurreyDad]

It is sunny, Fabby, but I'm stuck at work!

[Bearinthebigwoohouse]

I think you have a point, but I think you need to fill us in with a bit more detail. Are you living with your child's mum? Was the application form completed with your details on there?

[SurreyDad]

Yes ,we are living together! And both our details were on the form - although the form wasn't deigned in such a manner to make it easy to do that!

[Bearinthebigwoohouse]

Well then yes, it should be addressed to both of you.

[SurreyDad]

How do others find these letters addressed to them?

[HecateQueenOfTheNight]

If it was a woman posting about a letter re her child coming from the local authority addressed only to the child's father you lot would be hitting the bloody roof! Don't try to tell me you wouldn't be yelling sexism or asking for clarification on small details before forming an opinion!

[TheMonster]

It is unusual.

[DramaInPyjamas]

All letters concerning my kids are addressed 'To the parents of (.......)', 'Parent/Guardian', or Mr & Mrs (......)
Except bank accounts for them which I set up - they are addressed to me.

What's your wife/partners view on this?

If it really bothers you, contact your authorities. It won't change if you don't challenge it.

[Bearinthebigwoohouse]

Am I included in "you lot?". I always post opinions with the view that there may be more to a post than is initially said. My initial reaction was that he had a point - but if they hadn't been living together, he'd done all the form filling, and his details weren't on there, then he could hardly expect to be included.

[SurreyDad]

I have contacted them and am challenging it. It is the same with the NHS - they only offered my wife pre-natal and post-natal classes, although with things like vaccination call-ups they do address it to 'Parent(s) / Guardian(s) etc. My wife's not fussed - but then she is not the one beig discriminated against - although being assumed to be the only one to be communicated with about a child could be discrimination in itself.

Like I said, if all those with joint bank accounts / mortgages would be up in arms if the banks only wrote to the male of the household...

[Bearinthebigwoohouse]

That should say if she'd done the form filling .

[DramaInPyjamas]

tbh, I wouldn't. I'm not bothered..

[megapixels]

It is never addressed to Mrs. X, it is always addressed to whichever parent it is that made the application (and they only allow one name).