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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think elective repeat caesarian is a valid choice?

522 replies

schmee · 01/03/2011 17:58

I'm currently pregnant with DC3 and would like to have a repeat c-section. I had a planned c-section last time as had twins, one of whom was breach. I haven't seen the consultant yet, so I don't know if I'll be allowed one on the NHS but I hope so.

I remember last time round people saying "oooh I don't blame you if you're having twins" when I said I was booked into for a section. I really don't understand what "blame" has to do with it, particularly as the decision was made to safeguard the health of my twins. This time round if I say my preference is for a repeat c-section the response is even worse, with people from frenemies to strangers feeling able to question my choice and try to get me to reconsider. WHY?

I wondered if people here think repeat c-section is a valid choice. And whether anyone's mind about planned sections had been changed by watching One Born last night which showed what a calm and baby-focussed scenario a scheduled section can be.

OP posts:
worraliberty · 01/03/2011 18:01

It's a serious operation. I wouldn't undergo it unless I had to for the sake of my baby or myself.

Original poster
schmee · 01/03/2011 18:04

I guess if the NHS say I can then they think there is a valid reason.

OP posts:
scotsgirl23 · 01/03/2011 18:04

Unfortunately people do seem to think they have a right to comment about this - drives me nuts! My DD was born by ELCS due to severe SPD (nobody was told in advance as it was only arranged 2 days before) and plenty of people thought it was ok to ask why I didn't "try"!

Personally, I found it a really good experience. I've been told if I have another it's fairly likely the SPD will recur anyway, but I would have no qualms about asking for a repeat section regardless.

worraliberty · 01/03/2011 18:05

I'm not sure how it works really with the NHS but I'd like to think they would only do them for health reasons.

anothermum92 · 01/03/2011 18:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

rinabean · 01/03/2011 18:05

Of course it's valid. If you have previously preferred it to vaginal birth or if you just expect you will, it makes sense to have another section. And in your case would they not actually recommend it because vaginal birth after a section has a few risks?

The reason people question it is because even people who grudgingly admit women are people think pregnant women are just baby incubators. Same as most things along these lines...

Original poster
schmee · 01/03/2011 18:05

But actually worraliberty that's kind of my point. It's a serious operation in which I take the risks and the downsides onto myself, not my unborn child. But people seem to think it's almost a moral issue - that there is a moral imperative to try to give birth with the least intervention possible - and that they have the right to educate me on this...

OP posts:
Geriatricbabymama · 01/03/2011 18:06

YANBU
It's nobody else's business.

BooyFuckingHoo · 01/03/2011 18:07

if a section will be safer for you than a vaginal delievery then they will allow it. if it isn't then i don't really understand why you would want one.

Chynah · 01/03/2011 18:10

YANBU - I have had two ELCS - only way I would consider giving birth.

meliesmummy · 01/03/2011 18:11

I had an emergency section for my first preg. And I will never ever go thru the horror of the labour that I had ever again, I can't risk it. I was pg a few weeks ago but had a mc, it was always my intention to have another section. I've read the NICE guidelines (available online) and that convinced me further (regarding likelihood of complications with a vbac). My midwife supported me but I never got as far as seeing a consultant. It's your body and your baby so stick to your guns! YASNBU! You are considering the safely of yourself and your baby, how is that unreasonable? And btw the nice guidelines say that it's your choice. Good luck x

And btw my recovery was fine, I was up and about the next day.

Original poster
schmee · 01/03/2011 18:11

I think it's a good and valid way to give birth. I actually think if men gave birth then all births would be by caesarian unless you wanted to opt out.

Kind of like rinabean's point that "even people who grudgingly admit women are people think pregnant women are just baby incubators".

OP posts:
Original poster
schmee · 01/03/2011 18:13

Thank you meliesmummy and very sorry to hear of your mc. x

OP posts:
darleneconnor · 01/03/2011 18:15

C sections are more dangerous for the baby than a vb so yabu and im quire frankly shocked that you didnt already know this.

TattyDevine · 01/03/2011 18:15

It is a valid choice and in my hospital they never refuse a woman who has had a previous section. I think its that way across the board, but I might be wrong.

Do not discuss your birth choice with anyone if you dont want to. Nobody knew the day I was going in for my section apart from me, my husband and my mother. The birth and method were a complete surprise to everyone else.

expatinscotland · 01/03/2011 18:15

I think it's your choice and should be. It's a valid choice and if it's what's best for your mentally, then go for it.

After suffering from AND/PND that has become chronic for nearly 8 years, I never underestimate the impact and importance of mental health.

I have never had a CS, FWIW, and have 3 children.

Vallhala · 01/03/2011 18:16

YANBU.

It isn't anyone else's business and besides, it's YOUR body.

I had a vaginal birth, no painkiller as it all happened too quickly and an awful, frighening and agonising labour and birth with DD1. I swore I'd never do it again and thankfully my GP suggested and supported an ELCS with DD2, partially because of what I'd experienced the first time round and partially because DD1 was born so fast and there was a level crossing between my house and the hospital so chances were that I might have ended up giving birth in the car.

The ELCS was a wonderfully serene experience, the pain was controlled to the extent of being virtually non-existant and my recovery rapid. I would certainly have had another had I been lucky enough to have a third child.

I hope that you get the delivery you want and if I were you I'd treat those who judge you for your decision with the contempt they deserve - no-one has the right to expect you to go through unnecessary pain or distress.

Chynah · 01/03/2011 18:16

Darlene- CS are actually slightly safer for baby - more risky for mum though.

amothersplaceisinthewrong · 01/03/2011 18:17

This is your choice and you should be free to make it without judgement.

expatinscotland · 01/03/2011 18:17

And, even as a cat lover :o, I agree with Valhalla in this. Your body, your choice, your business.

meliesmummy · 01/03/2011 18:17

Vaginal births after a section are actually more dangerous darlene for the mum and baby

tabulahrasa · 01/03/2011 18:18

isn't it a fairly similar thing to choosing formula feeding rather than breastfeeding?

It's a similar argument really isn't it?

It's very clear that one is better for mother and baby, so anyone choosing to do the other without a strong medical reason is going to be judged for it.

not saying I do necessarily - but that's what happens

FabbyChic · 01/03/2011 18:19

I dont think a c section should be an option as a choice, I don't believe women should be able to choose to have one. Surely the only time women have a c section is if it is needed for medical reasons.

Who wants to be cut open seriously?

Whats wrong with giving birth naturally?

Or is it can't be arsed with the labour pains?

Vallhala · 01/03/2011 18:20

expat, have a look at the photo on my profile... she's a foster girl, waiting for a forever home and currently sharing the house with the 4 I already have. :)

Sorry OP, as you were... :)

TattyDevine · 01/03/2011 18:20

Tabula - you are incorrect there regarding risk. It depends on previous section, and in any case, CS is slightly less risk for the baby regardless.

Its not quite as black and white as the risk/benefits of FF over BF.