obese and can't find my will power

[fattime]

HELP how do I lose weight? I keep trying but can't stop eating. Where has my will power gone? When I know I am on the road to destruction why can't I find my will power? Feel like I am a lost cause and idiot

[Beauregard]

How much do you need to lose?
And you are not and idiot by the way.

[fattime]

I am 5 ft 1.5 inches and weight 13.4 stones so I must be an idiot

[tortoise]

fattime Your not an idiot.
I'm 13 st and feel like you. I have totally lost all will power. The other night for example i ate 3 packets of crisps one after another. And then 2 snack chocolate bars. I want to be able to think before i eat and not do it.

[Beauregard]

No definately not an idiot
Have you dieted before?and which diets?
WW are pretty reliable for weight loss and you can diet online if you are embarrassed,also slimming world are meant to be really good.
Do you exercise?
Sometimes just walking is enough to speed up weight loss.

[fattime]

Thank you pelvic.. I have tried every diet going in the past and tried clubs in recent years but never stick to them and then starve the day before weight-in so I have lost a pound or not put on and so I must be stupid. Now trying walking but think I am going to have a heart attack because I then come home and spend the time eating and don't even do any housework. If you are still reading this thank you. you are allowed to take back the idiot bit now as you must be thinking I was right

[schneebly]

you could be me (only I am heavier). Do you feel like you are a compulsive overeater or do you think it is just bad habits?

[fattime]

Oh Schneebly I am a total compulsive overeater I eat and think I,ll stop after this one, I,ll eat and then realise I have just eaten the whole 6 pack of choc bars I,ll go to bed and promise myself that I wont do it tomorrow. I eat in secret you name it I do it - total idiot! Thing is when I was in my teens I was not overweight but I was always trying a new diet thinking I was overweight if I was in a size 12 most of the time I was a size 10 but still felt everyone else was slim and I wasn't

[Beauregard]

Still not an idiot......so there
Have you just tried changing the sorts of things that you eat?swap crisps for lower fat ones or rice cakes etc,dont fry anything,steam your veg.
Im no expert believe me but surely small changes are better than none.
Walk as often as you can and clean lots ,that is a good way of keeping your mind off food and you get a clean house thrown in.
I understand that food is a comfort, i use it as a crutch and binge eat sometimes as well.

[fattime]

thanks pelvic... I know what to do I just don't do any of it yes low-fat but can't be bothered to do any housework as I hate the house too small spend all my time trying to find places to put things and so half the time just end up making new piles. Been trying things to laugh about but I have found I am good at pretending and this makes me feel even worse when I shut the door

[schneebly]

fattime - you are me! I would reccomend seeing your GP and explaining how you feel about your eating. Maybe you will be eligible for some kind of couselling re overeating? I went to my GP but he wasnt very helpful despite the fact that my BMI is 40! He has made me an appointment with the practise nurse to get weighed in and talk about diet etc. Not sure it will work.

[Beauregard]

Fattime-Scneebly is right ,you obviously have real issues with food and are locked in a vicious cycle ,food is like a drug to some people and is just as addictive as cigarettes etc,maybe your Gp could put you on the right path to help yourself.

[tortoise]

You do sound just like me.
schneebly The drsw sounds a good idea. I really think i need to do that too.
I got to goal weight with ww about 5 yrs ago. Can't do it now though.

[tortoise]

drs*

[fattime]

Schneebly let me know how you get on you never know. I know I should go to doctors but

but

but

I'm an idiot

Tortoise what do you think about going to doctors?
Maybe if all three of us go we could compare reaction/responses from doctors?

[kiwinat]

This might be inspiring.

www.dietgirl.org

it can be done.

[fizzbuzz]

Feel I may get some stick about this.....

I love sweets cakes etc, but found these fantastic. I am capable of overeating massive amounts, but these took away a lot of (well all of really) hunger pangs. Not saying use them forever, but might help to kick start you.

I lost 3 stone a bit ago using them. Most of it has stayed off since then TBH, but only have to rein in occasionally now, rather than contemplating losing 3 stone

[fizzbuzz]

Also would like to add, that I have seen counsellors, dieticians ect about overeating issues.

After years of not understanding myself, I realised that I overate because I like food and have a big appetite. It was as simple as that. I could never subscribe to the fact that I was overeating because of happinesss/unhappiness, and in fact this caused more confusion. I have now accepted that I love my grub...end of story really.

Dh gets New Scientist, and there is always stuff in there about genes and overeating.

Not saying a lot of people don't eat for emotional reasons, but in my case this was just not true.

Once the appetite had gone, found it easy to lose weight.

HTH

[pesme]

you can do it but you need to be ready. hard to explain but i was in your position this time last year. i know all about the stuffing biscuits in and then promising tomorrow will be different. then one day i just decided that was it and i stopped eating bread, all biscuity cake crap. porridge for breakfast, soup for lunch and a healthy dinner. i am now 10 stone and can't quite believe it. for me it was alot like quitting smoking, the hardest part of not smoking in the decision to not have a cigarette ever again (sounds obvious i know) but i tried quitting loads of times but was never really ready to not smoke again. it is the same with food i had to decide i was not going to have the croissants etc again. as my friend put it yesterday "we actually need to eat a disappointingly small amount of food". anyway hope this helps. take care of yourself.

[ssd]

fattime, trust me your not an idiot

[fizzbuzz]

Yes agree that it will happen when you are ready.....to some extent if you can think like that, it may make you more relaxed about it.

[tortoise]

fattime It will take a lot for me to actually make an appointment. I have been thinking about it for weeks.
I'm ok if there is no food in the house to snack on.Not much chance of that with 4 children!!
I do walk a lot though which helps keep the weight down. Its mainloy evenings when i eat.

[Elasticwoman]

I believe that healthy eating starts at the supermarket. Just don't buy crisps and confectionary of any kind, so that it's not in the cupboard when you get a craving.

However, this rebounded on me this week when Sainsbury's gave me a free sample bar of (ever so virtuous) Fairtrade chocolate!

But it does work in general. I know if I had crisps in the house they would be burning a hole in my cupboard till I had demolished them. If I want crisps I have to go over the road to the pub and admit that I have a crisp fetish. I did that once and although no one laughed or looked askance, I never want to do it again.

[schneebly]

Elasticwoman - I see what you are saying but I rarely buy any of that stuff - it doesnt matter. You can compulsively overeat bread, cereal, oatcakes, anything really! I know because that is what I do.

[brimfull]

pesme's post is spot on imo.

[dandasmummy]

fattime, I am 5'5" and weigh 13st8 (well, 13st now). Like you I have a real problem with overeating. Have lost weight with WW in the past. Was 9st3, 5 years ago. then got pregnant with DD1, went up to 13st6 in 2002. Managed to get down to 10st by 2005, but did use some slimming tablets to lose the last stone (never again!). Then got pregnant with DD2. Weight shot back up again, and kept going! Couldn't get a grip on it at all. A friend did Paul McKenna's Weight Loss System, lost 4st, has kept it off for 1 1/2 years, and looks fantastic. I started it just over 3 weeks ago. Lost 8lbs (easily) in first two weeks. Found the third week a bit harder, and cheated a bit, but didn't end up bingeing (a result for me) and can tell I've lost a bit more weight. Will weigh myself on Tues, so hopefully will be under 13st by then. The system makes perfeact sense, and the cds to go with the book really do seem to help. I'm starting to feel much more in control of my eating. I've stopped bingeing and eating in secret. Maybe give it a try? x