Hi all,
DD is 14 and in year 9 at a private school, with what I thought had a good reputation. For the past couple of months I've heard some stories from her about people in her school and the drug use which goes. She never really elaborated and while I was concerned, I thought nothing more of it that a few silly boys, a couple of years above smoking weed in a park or something. But just last night, when we were chatting, my expectations of what I thought where greatly exceeded. Turns out its the year 10s (year above dd) that have a reputation for being the most horrendous year in the school and dd said at least 40% of them drink and take drugs (and I'm talking drugs such as cocaine, ecstasy etc) and a large portion of this percentage is girls too, a couple of which she knows. There has also been a few incidents such as overdoses etc in school too. My problem is that kids in her year have been supplied by them and some go to their parties at weekends. My dd is hard working and for the minute has her feet firmly on the ground, but what worries me is that that may change soon. I know as she's approaching 15 she'll want to have EVEN more freedom and will start to be invited to parties. DD assures me that she will never take drugs and that alcohol does not appeal to her but there is still that worry of being "easily led" or to "fit in". I've gotten a wakeup call and it astounds me that although the teachers are aware of what goes on, they turn a blind eye and only get involved if an illicit substance is brought into school or something happens to damage their precious reputation. Surely some sort of drugs awareness presentation could be given, because the need for it is obviously there.
I need advice on is there anything more I can do, I've warned dd and drummed into her the dangers of drugs and to avoid them at all costs but what do I do at school when drugs could be handed to her on a plate?
Thanks in advance 
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Worrying situation at dd's school.
TeaLover422 · 23/06/2014 17:36
Thanks for the responses ladies. Going to ring up the school tomorrow and ask about how they broach drugs awareness.Going to have another informal chat with dd tonight using what maddiebrowns said. Having went to a state school myself, I was never aware of what went on within private schools, shocked is an understatement so to speak 
Why on earth are you talking about this as a private/state school thing? 
NOTHING to do with the school or state / private
Drug use in that age group is rife round here ( London ) - which I know first hand starts in year 8 (age 13) with weed and progresses to ketamine, mdma and anything else that's cheaply available. Sadly for our kids drugs are cheaper than ever and the option of a cider in the pub is no longer available to them as they would need ID.
My advice is keep communication with your DD open, try not to be preachy and as she gets older keep a close eye at all times. Obviously festivals and parties are where it happens. Also keep yourself well informed and don't just say things like ' all drugs are bad'. There are a lot of parents in denial out there.
I would also demand the school provide plenty of drug ed for kids also importantly for parents. They surely must already be doing this ?
It's a good sign your DD has talked to you about this. Keep her talking. My DD also tells me the stories ( she has nothing to hide ) my DS tells me absolutely nothing, because he does have stuff to keep from me
The only drugs "awareness" dd has had was a presentation given by the r.e department last year and that was based more on what the religious morals surround drug and alcohol use and not about the actual effects of drug taking. Have been browsing on the frank website and gathered a lot of good information, going to tell dd to check it out too. And Claybury I truly do feel for you, I'd hate if my child didn't tell me anything
I actually do think there is a private/ state aspect to the issue although of course drugs are an issue in any school. 2 reasons. First - private school students obviously tend to come from financially better-off backgrounds . Research shows that where there is spare cash to splash, recreational drug use is much more likely to follow. Second, private schools don't have to follow the NC to the same extent and don't have the same impetus to provide an open and honest drugs education. Instead, it is not in their interest to openly admit that any of their students could have a drugs problem - not good PR for prospective parents at all.
OP I think the most effective thing you can do is keep talking to your dd honestly about both the risks and the thrills of drugs. You need to be able to admit that drugs are fun, exciting and attractive to a teen as well as dangerous and harmful. In the end she will have to make up her own mind and live in a world where this is a fact of life. All schools are fairly powerless against this.
I agree, haffdonga- but that was not the private/state issue the OP had in mind!
I have two children at different state secondary schools with very different socio economic catchments. The school with richer kids has a significantly worse drug problem, but I think the alcohol problem is about the same. Cheap spirits is on of the worst things to happen to teenage drinking- a bottle of Tesco value vodka is less than a tenner.
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