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What do you do with a DS who is too lazy to fix himself some lunch?!

(119 Posts)
Horsemad Thu 03-Jan-13 21:25:44

Typical 15yr old, obsessed with computer games. Gets up and immediately goes on pc (during weekends and holidays - has tried this on school mornings and had short shrift).

When I'm working I leave before he's up, it's obvious to me that he's not had breakfast or lunch when I get home. He says he's not hungry, but I suspect he eats his selection box chocolate whilst at the pc.

I don't mind him being on the pc, he's out of trouble and I know where he is etc, but I'm getting fed up with him not eating!

hugoagogo Sat 05-Jan-13 15:59:37

I remember when my dc used to love to help me hoover, wash up and bake <wistful>

Sadly the journey to adulthood from childhood is not a simple linear progression.

Booyhoo Sat 05-Jan-13 16:00:24

they're still part of the family, able to participate in family meals and be responsible for their own food when no-one else is there. they dont turn into babies.

Bonsoir Sat 05-Jan-13 16:02:00

"Boohyoo, Expert On Teenagers"

ROFL.

Booyhoo Sat 05-Jan-13 16:04:01

yes hilarious.

Bonsoir Sat 05-Jan-13 16:05:02

Wait another 10 years...

<evil cackle>

flow4 Sat 05-Jan-13 16:18:50

FFS. Is teenage attitude infectious? Do you catch it when you talk about it, or something?! hmm

I'd love one of your cranberry scones, hugo, thank you. They sound calming delicious!

Bonsoir Sat 05-Jan-13 16:21:10

It's sadly not teenage attitude. Their brains go all funny and shrink and they revert to toddler levels of self-control and it is not their fault or that of their parents (their parents do, however, have to manage it).

hugoagogo Sat 05-Jan-13 16:21:42

They are calming <hands one over> I had to have 2 this afternoon after particularly stressful encounter this pm.

hugoagogo Sat 05-Jan-13 16:23:12

Oh jeepers, my English! Ah well, you'll have known what I meant. blush

LineRunner Sat 05-Jan-13 16:31:19

I just had a conversation with teenage DS (on xbox) which was pretty much:

Are you hungry - No, mum
Would you like a snack - No, thanks
Shall I make you a hotdog? - Yes, please

Things are different in teenage-brain-world.

mrsjay Sat 05-Jan-13 16:33:50

let him starve and tbh I had a lazy mare at 15 she would not make herself anything if i was out and come sniffing for food when i came back , I left her to it and she did eventually make herself something, and id limit his xbox time they imo rot the brain grin

Bonsoir Sat 05-Jan-13 16:34:02

Oh I know that one.

What time would you like supper - don't know
Is there anything I should get you at M&S - don't know
Do you need a packed lunch any day next week - don't know
There is pizza/chocolate cake in the kitchen - sound of elephants hooves in the hall

flow4 Sat 05-Jan-13 16:35:13

I was being cheeky and referring to the adults here, Bonsoir hmm grin
And thank you, I have two teens of my own, so I already have plenty of ridiculous theories opinions about their development and behaviour. grin

hugo, I am licking my lips... Are you sure you have enough to go round?! grin

Booyhoo Sat 05-Jan-13 16:36:53

why do you even ask again after the first "no, mum" confused

tbh if someone asked me a third time about food after i'd told them twice i didn't want anything i'd probably say yes to get them to stop asking.

LineRunner Sat 05-Jan-13 16:37:23

It's ok, he's taking down Xmas decorations now and wrapping up the baby Jesus, in return for said hotdog. I am not entirely without guile.

LineRunner Sat 05-Jan-13 16:39:14

why do you even ask again

Because it's it 4.35pm and he hasn't eaten all day, and it's now getting dark.

I think it's the specificity of the request that matters.

Booyhoo Sat 05-Jan-13 16:42:22

so if he's hungry he'll either say so or get himself something, surely?

unless he has an eating disorder, i'd say he'd find his way to the fridge when he realised his stomach was rumbling. he wont starve himself.

Bonsoir Sat 05-Jan-13 16:45:01

LOL. I know teenage boys who when they go to university lose 10 kg in the first year and then put it all on again over the summer holidays, with some spare for the second year hmm

hugoagogo Sat 05-Jan-13 16:45:34

so if he's hungry he'll either say so or get himself something, surely?

If teenage boys responded like this, we wouldn't all be on here saying how weird they are would we?

I also think that they don't experience hunger the same way.
DS1 (17) will often come home from college with packed lunch untouched because he was so engrossed with lessons or activities that he forgot to eat.
On the other hand he will make and eat a huge bowl of pasta at 3pm for his lunch, eat a family meal with us at 7pm and then graze all evening until cereal for supper at midnight.

Because it's it 4.35pm and he hasn't eaten all day YY. I don't know about anyone else but I haven't lost that maternal need to feed them even though they are both bigger than me.

Booyhoo Sat 05-Jan-13 16:51:49

" I know teenage boys who when they go to university lose 10 kg in the first year and then put it all on again over the summer holidays, with some spare for the second year "

i cant think why hmm

maybe it's because they are being spoonfed until they leave for uni at 18?

hugo, really what do you think is going to happen to them if you dont ask them twice if they're hungry? it's not a life and death thing. they will find the fridge eventually.

im not so convinced it's the teens that are weird TBH.

Bonsoir Sat 05-Jan-13 16:53:02

You are really quite funny, Booyhoo grin

<just you wait>

<cackle, cackle>

flow4 Sat 05-Jan-13 16:58:13

BREAKING NEWS :: DIFFERENT PARENTS DO DIFFERENT THINGS!

We'd all be Stepford Wives if we all raised our children in identical ways...

I'm personally of the "neglect them as much as possible and it will make them marvellously independent in the end" school of parenting, but I never assume anyone else has to be the same! grin

Bonsoir Sat 05-Jan-13 16:59:30

Has that worked, flow4? It's my DSSs' mother's school of thought too...

Booyhoo Sat 05-Jan-13 17:05:16

well dont you think there might be a connection between people making every single meal for their teens and checking 3 times whether they want food and the teens then being unable to feed themselves when they go away from home? i think that's really sad. who wants to raise incapable children? it all seems very enabling to me. fine, if you want your adult dcs to be ever dependant on you but dont whinge about it and call them weird when you've encouraged it.

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