Crepeys Not Crêpes

(1000 Posts)
Cremolafoam Thu 06-Sep-12 15:38:40

Oi over here hags

herbaceous Sat 08-Sep-12 12:51:24

I think I'm also mixin' and matchin' too much. For example, I'll have bacon and eggs for breakfast and a salad with lots of proteiny stuff, inc cheese, for lunch. Then I think 'ooh haven't I done well' and have sausage and mash for tea, with wine.

Ah, I feel I must point out the upside of not succeeding in a weight reduction campaign: you will stay unlined and youthful for longer. In my case, things have come to pass as per my own prophecy this time last year: I said if I lost any weight I would look wrinkly and saggy. My exercise campaign to just get fitter has resulted in weightloss I could have done without: I have now gone beyond mere crepeyness and am in wizened hag territory. I have wrinkles in places where it bloody well shouldn't happen.

<<eats another cheese sandwich>>

herbaceous Sat 08-Sep-12 13:20:20

Ah yes, strops. The old 'face vs arse' debate. My face is winning.

Though I say so myself, I do look younger in the face than my younger, slimmer, sister.

motherinferior Sat 08-Sep-12 13:29:58

I can SO much recommend the British Library where I have spent another morning. It is a style desert. Men in sandals. Very, very refreshing. (My day job is on a wimmin's mag, I should point out, where everyone wears scary shoes except my favourite crepey colleague, who would fit in here very well.)

MrsS: do the exam. You are very bright, and very good, and incredibly hard-working. (None of which, especially the last, apply to AB.) I would think you have a very good chance of being able to smile patronisingly at him as you sail off into the sunset, preferably somewhere rather fabulous where we can all come and stay with you.

Talking of which, are we on for a meetup next week and if so where and when? I thought MrsS was heading to the big smoke and we were planning to take advantage of this to drink celebrate?

MrsSchadenfreude Sat 08-Sep-12 13:47:33

I will be in London on 12th for one night only. grin

Are we up for a Hags meet? If not I will find one of my men to take me out to dinner.

alto1 Sat 08-Sep-12 14:26:34

One of your men, MrsS?

Reminds me of Peggy Guggenheim, when asked 'how many husbands have you had, Peggy?' she replied 'my own, or other people's?'

Like the sound of your chat with your boss. There aren't many suitable skewering rejoinders for use with condescending men - their skins being so thick.

Hi Saggy

I remember that sigh of relief, MI, when you realise you definitely did make the right decision about the school.

Sounds as though you've made a good move too Blackduck - didn't it involve more than a bit of tribulation? Glad to hear it's working out.

DameSaggarmakersbottomknocker Sat 08-Sep-12 14:50:41

Tilly - not teacher no - school secretary. I'm stern but fair especially to the Yr3 parent who still wishes to help her ds off with his coat

My face is also winning in the arse v face debate but also I appear to have norks for the first time since pregnancy. Tis most disturbing. My running bra is feeling the strain.

bigTillyMint Sat 08-Sep-12 15:37:55

Ah Saggy, the dragon on the doorgrin

I'm going for the face too, but I'm not sure it's working! I feel about 190 today, but that probably has alot to do with how much I had to drinkand the time I went to bed last night.

I could probably be persuaded to meet up on the 12th MrsS, as DH will not be required to stay late at a Parents Evening/Prize Giving or whatever that night. As long as DS is coping with his homework and I'm coping with my full-time job!

wilbur Sat 08-Sep-12 17:07:39

I also have to do something about the creeping flubber. Having kept off the 20lbs I lost a few years ago, about half a stone has snuck up on me this summer following my abandoning my strict "once I go above X in weight I do something about it" policy. It is pants when the weight comes back, and so easy to do and then awful to lose. angry Anyway, will be low-carbing too, once I have got to the shop to buy fat free yohurt and low carb items and once I have finished the jam tarts in the biscuit tin. blush

Oh and major rant re Boden dress coming up. Both sizes arrived, size 10 was better (hooray) as it's v stretchy and I have no boobs. It's a lovely style and very flattering and would have been brilliant for work. So I wore it yesterday to the funeral of a friend's mother (2nd funeral in 2 weeks sad) and the buggering, buggering thing proceeded to totally unravel at the waist seam, came apart with literally gaping holes in two places. Found the first one in church, managed to borrow a safety pin, discovered 2nd one at wake. So I was trying to talk to my poor friend and her brother and sister - so sad, their mum was only 66 - while panicking that everyone there could see the top of my tights through the dress. I am so furious with Boden I can hardly speak, and they will be hearing some of my choicest words when I call to complain on Monday.

Glad to hear about nice pub evening BD, lovely to have a fun new night out like that. And hi Alto, welcome back (I def remember you as eemie). Having a lovely day now - have done very satisfying clearing round garage and at the front of the house, planted up a lovely climber I got as a housewarming, and it all looks far, far better out there. Now waiting for friend to come for tea and then we're going next door for a drink later. Neighbours are having a huge joint 50th bday - there's a marquee on the lawn, yay, so dh and I are a bit excited about going over for a snoop getting to know the neighbours evening.

Cremolafoam Sat 08-Sep-12 18:42:01

shock at the Great Unravelling Boden Dress. That's disgraceful behaviour from johnny . Poor you Wilbur.get onto customer service pronto. Take no prisoners I say.

Dd has managed to lose her purse which contained her cash card/ provisional driving license/ brand new student card/ bus card with 40 journeys on it .
I am extraordinarily proud of not loosing the rag and adding to her woes angry
I have been very even tempered and sympathetic and didn't shout. This is a complete departure for me- haha!
Get me ! all calm and fair.

Ok in the arse versus face competition - I think my face is winning too. Arse not too bad either but stomach is a right off and I've started to develop that solid tyre of duuno what above flabby tum. Hateful.
It's middle aged spread isn't it?< wails>

Herbs I am exactly the same with the food - my menus are not dissimilar to yours.
I have halved carb intake from before low carb life. I am convinced my extra tyre is entirely composed of a sausage and egg mix thoughhmm

CointreauVersial Sat 08-Sep-12 21:22:32

Low carbing is All or Nothing I'm afraid, Herbs! Haven't you been listening to Auntie BIWI? And the fat doesn't matter at all unless you throw in some carbs to accompany it. Wilbur, your low-fat yogurt will be higher carb than full-fat Greek.

Face v Arse? Hmm....I shall stay slim and haggard for the time being; I did hate that sausage-and-egg-mix spare tyre and don't want it back just yet, thanks.

I'm feeling virtuous and somewhat stiff this evening after a day in the garden. We ended up with a new flower bed last year after digging out some horrible conifers, and it was rather too big, so I bought a few rolls of turf and laid them. Unfortunately it makes the rest of our lawn look well scabby.

MrsS - I can't believe you said the word "vagina" to your boss! Mine would absolutely recoil in horror.

herbaceous Sun 09-Sep-12 00:09:37

Just been to last night of paralympics. Despite, or maybe because, there being no UK athletes doing much, the atmosphere was incredible. We were stuck in an enclave of South Africans, including the family of the girl who won silver in the 400m something or other. Did lots of super Mexican Waving. And sang along to the music played in the stadium, something I never do.

CV - I rather feared that was the case, re low-carbing. I was hoping I could just do 'less', rather than low, and get away with it. I have to confess to being rather scared of BIWI. She's something of a queen bee, and every time I've ventured on to one of her threads I've left feeling inadequate.

Tonight was an utter diet fail. Threw caution to the wind and bought fish and chips at Olympics. Fish was totally off - all smelly and orange. So I ate the chips and mushy peas. Then when I got home had some wine. And leftover curry our babysitters hadn't eaten.

DameSaggarmakersbottomknocker Sun 09-Sep-12 09:11:28

shock at the Boden dress. Give 'em what for wilbur.

I'm the original carb monster so I don't even attempt to low carb. I try to eat good carbs though and I've cut back on the booze <pointedly ignores evening out with sister last night> It's just a bit rubbish isn't it? I used to be able to run a bit more and two weeks later I'd have lost the excess but now this bit around my middle just persists. I could run a marathon and I think I'd still be carrying my spare tyre with me. As I said though I do seemingly have more boobs which given my usual 34A is a welcomed bonus.

Lovely morning here.

bigTillyMint Sun 09-Sep-12 09:18:46

Saggy, I too don't even attempt to low carb (and eat good carbs!), have a persistent gunt but my 34A boobs are not for growing!

Herbs, very envy of you at the paralympics again. I soooooooooo wish I could watch the victory parade - I would have been able to had I not gone back to working full-timeangry

We have finished the wallpapering, but I spent all night listening for the sound of it peeling off the wall and dropping on my head!

alto1 Sun 09-Sep-12 09:35:49

Managed to get to the market yesterday and got decent fresh local fruit instead of the usual. Can smell the fresh strawberries from upstairs & the peaches are as good as the ones we had in Italy. Hoping to kick-start my new-academic-year resolutions, all about healthy eating and Appropriate Self-Care.

Doesn't help that DD has inherited her father's taste in food - think he lived on American pizza and chocolate fudge cake before he met me.

Sunshine definitely helps - off to the woods now with altodog.

motherinferior Sun 09-Sep-12 10:50:18

I spent yesterday afternoon atoning for Maternal Absence by making lots of curry (quite a few leftovers, hurrah). Suspect we will eat better, frankly, when Mr Inferior goes back to work, as he is doing most of the cooking (it's got to the point where he looks huffily at me if I offer a helpful suggestion about our menus) and is not what you might call mr low-fat high-veg in the food department.

He has also taken over the shopping. Again, this is a bit of a Poisoned Chalice as it means when I am producing a meal we are devoid of greenery. I did however pick up pak choi at the Chinese supermarket so we are getting a stir-fry with noodles and prawns later.

DD2 and I are on our own today as DP has gone to do hippy t'ai chi and DD1 has gone to a picnic in the local park with her Y6 mates from primary.

I have a bazillion and one things to do today, which is why I am currently sitting aimlessly in front of the computer and flipping between news sites and MN. Just trying to get my act together.
We went round to friends yesterday for a bbq and had a lovely time. We seem to have acquired a bit of a social life over the last year but I am - as is my wont - failing entirely to host any dos myself. This is for many reasons, not least that the idea of catering for anyone other than my close family gives me the willies and dh's culinary and hosting skills are entirely absent, as is his desire to bother with any of it. However, I also can't cope with the idea of having loads of children in my house and letting them go wherever they want and do whatever they want. I should add that there were 15 boys there - ranging in age from 5 to 10 and all very well-behaved, so the atmos was v. pleasant - but I came away feeling like an antisocial failure because I will never be able to reciprocate the invitation.
I have realised that I need to work at maintaining a social life but I don't think I know how sad
(yes, I realise this is a pathetic admission)

Oh and when I mentioned this isshoo to dh just now, he said "What are you worried about? You are good at that kind of thing." Nooooo, I'm not.

alto1 Sun 09-Sep-12 13:38:01

I used to invite people round all the time and not worry but I'm out of practice & my confidence is shot.

Two of my recent attempts to make up for this were derailed when I had to take DH for emergency hospital admission (not food-related, thank goodness).

I also used to invite people from work regularly. I gave that up a year ago after a viper-like betrayal by a colleague, made more painful by the guest-friendship between us, which I had fondly and delusionally treasured.

This afternoon I will give home-made veg chilli (from the freezer), baked potatoes and salad to a couple of friends who've stood by us through DH's illnesses and who won't (I think) judge us on the state of the house, garden or cuisine.

rubyrubyruby Sun 09-Sep-12 13:55:27

I feel like I've been hit by a truck today

....... have gone back to bed sad

bigTillyMint Sun 09-Sep-12 14:16:47

Oh dear ruby - hope it's not alcohol related like mine was yesterday!

Enjoying the sun - cycled up to see DS in his footy tournament (and DH as a linesman with a flaggrin) with DD and she has been baking while I entertained a lovely MNer and her DH who had come to collect my DM's spinning wheel!

Might do some pruning in the garden now!

DameSaggarmakersbottomknocker Sun 09-Sep-12 14:19:53

We have family round for supper this evening - I've given dd the job of cooking one of the main dishes and dh the other. I shall be responsible for salad, bread and pudding (shop bought). Oh and booze. What's the worst that can happen? hmm

motherinferior Sun 09-Sep-12 14:25:40

Rubes, you poor thing.

DD2 and I have lunched gloriously on fishfingers and oven chips blush and I am trying to track down the non-crepey MNer (she is absolutely lovely, just 34 envy) with whom I am going to the pub tonight.

My 32 year old (childless) beauty editor colleague returns from hol tomorrow. This has its drawbacks in that she considers anyone over about 37 positively disfigured by age. Which is wearing.

herbaceous Sun 09-Sep-12 17:40:33

We've had people round for lunch! They've just left, which I reckon means the day was a success.

We have the opposite problem to strops - we're always inviting people round, but don't get many return invitations. Which is a trifle worrying.

bigTillyMint Sun 09-Sep-12 18:17:38

Herbs that must mean that you are such awesome hosts that others feel they can't competesmile

First full wekk of work this week, eeek. And I will have to rush back to get the car to rush to pick DS up from two footy trials....

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