how often do you see your parents?

[colie]

How often do you see your mum and then your dad? I was reading something recently (it was dated 1995) but stated that most adults over 16 see their mum once a week, think it was 52%, and something like 47% saw their Dads once a week.

I am feeling extremeley guilty as I don't see mine anywhere near that, and neither does dh see his anything like that amount. Granted we do live 250 miles away from them. My mum has lived about 300 miles away from me for the past 16 years so can't really compare it.

Also, this article indicated that adults with children see their mums more often than adults without children. Suppose this makes sense.

Anyhow, what are your experiences? Do you think these statistics would ring true now, over 10 years later.

[pollywobbledoodle]

see my mum(20 mins away) once a week or so for an afternoon.less before dd arrived

see mil 4-6 weekly for a weekend(2 hour+ drive)...he's always seen her about that often

[piratecat]

my see my mum about 3 times a yr, she lives in spain.

i see my dad about once a week, as i now live in the same town as him.

[ginnny]

I see my Mum about twice a week but speak on the phone or email her most days. We are very close.

My Dad is dead now but I used to see him about 2 or 3 times a year (when guilt tripped into it )

I think it depends on the relationship you have with the parent.

[fryalot]

Normally about two or three times a year each (but for an extended time - a week or two)

My dad is ill at the moment so have seen him twice since Christmas already and will get over as much as possible for the foreseeable future.

I'm in Yorkshire, mum's in Essex and Dad's in Wales.

[FAQinglovely]

last saw my parents on the 30th November, last spoke to them on New Years Day (or was it a few days after Christmas? I can't remember now) - they don't even know I've moved........well actually they probably do as whoever it is that's been reading my posts on here will more than likely have tipped them off.

[Tinkerisdead]

my mum is 50 miles away, see her once every 4-6 weeks. See my dad twice a year.

PIL is 2 streets away and we used to see them weekly. but since DD was born three months ago, we've only seen them 6 times. I'm sure it'll increase back to weekly as DD becomes more entertaining!

[WotsOccuring]

We also live over 200 miles from both sets of parents. We see mine prob once every 4-6 weeks but we only see PIL once every 8-10 weeks.

Would love it to be more but really can't face the journey any more frequently than that [and don't think it's fair to keep DS strapped in his car seat for this length of time for numerous visits) plus it's always us that has to make the journey!

[colie]

When we lived 20 mins away from inlaws, dh would never mention visiting them. After 6 weeks or so I would feel guilty and suggest we visit.

Though it did annoy me that they would never visit us, especially when they hadn't seen grandkids for that length of time.

Would love to see my mum once a week though

[Sazlocks]

about once a month - they and in laws live around 1.5 hours away.
It's more than enough for us TBH

[claire002]

See my mum and dad (separately) about once a week or every other week - but that's only since I've had DD and have no life. They also only live 30 mins away now. Before then saw them every other month if that. But never chat to them on the phone (would if they ever called me!).

DH speaks to his parents every few days, and gets massive guilt trips if he doesn't ring. We see them every 3 weeks or so (they live an hour away), but again that's only since DD - before that was every two months or so.

I think having kids makes a huge difference, as your life and priorities change, well, that and how far away they are.

[colie]

Wotsoccuring-I think it is great that you travel that distance that often. Have you lived that far away from your parents for a long time?
I found that when we first moved 250 miles away I would travel up every 6 weeks or so. I don't do it that often now though. Like you said I just think it is unfair having kids strapped in the car all the time.

Also like you said, we end up doing it all the time and they hardly ever do.

Although my mum does visit every 8 weeks or so. The in-laws and my dad don;t though.

TheDoctorsWife46- same here. I saw much more of my pil pre children. Really, once we needed their help it wasn't there as much!

[WotsOccuring]

colie...yes, we have always lived at least an hours drive away (we're down south and parents are both up north) we're currently about 3 hours drive away. Unfortunately they are of the old school of thought that they will fall off the edge of the world if they venture too far out of the village so it's always been up to us to do the travelling. Prob made a rod for our own back.

PIL are more active than mine but don't visit and DH is always being guilt-tripped but we try not to get trapped by that but it's hard - especially when MIL sometimes tries to play us off against each other...she can be very sneaky indeed and will call us separately making out that she hasn't spoken to the other! Aren't families fab LOL!?!

[elliott]

those figures will be very skewed remember. There will be people who live really local to their family who see them nearly every day, then there will be those who live in a different town who may see them a few times a year. So its a bit meaningless without looking at it in the context of distance.
I see my dad about once every couple of months, we see dh's dad probably similarly. When my mum was alive it was probably less frequent - maybe 3 or 4 times a year.

[KingCanuteIAm]

Mum, daily at least.
Dad, every 3 months ish as he is over 200 miles away.

It used to be the other way round though!

[branflake81]

We live 5 mins away from our parents. We tend to bob round to DP's parents every Friday night for half an hour or so, I see mine once a week/every ten days.

[deckchair]

I see my mum most days as she only lives a mile or so away and does the drop off and pick up of DD to school if I am working.
I do try and treat her to a night out a few times a year (just the 2 of us) as she does so much for us.
When my dad was alive, I used to see them both 3 times a week, just a quick pop in on my way back from work or similiar.

I will not go and see mil anymore for numerous reasons(would need a separate thread) but she can want to come every 4 weeks or leave it for 4 months between visits. She lives about 300 miles away.

Fil and step mil live in same place as mil so we do not see them very much. Ds is nearly 18mth and they have seen him twice.
I am just for my children

[Flyonthewindscreen]

We see my dad and SM every 2-3 months (they live 2 hour drive away) and PILs at least once a fortnight (they live 25 min drive away). This feels about right for me/DH/DC.

Like some other posters we seem to do most of the visiting, which is annoying since all parents/inlaws are in good health and can drive!

[hunnybun1981]

i see my mum usually every 2/3 days talk everyday on the phone

mum works but also minds my girls for me in evening time and occasionally at weekends.

dad (seperated from mum)

see usually once a week sometimes more somtimes less but would never leave it longer than 2 weeks

[beanieb]

once every couple of weeks. She lives 4 miles away but we both have busy lives. My dad is dead but when he was alive I saw him every couple of years as he lived abroad.

[milou2]

Every 2 months, but I'd like it to be every month.

[JiminyCricket]

I visit them 2-4 times a year each (but then they do both life 4.5 hours drive away from me in opposite directions, my mum comes here too but my dad doesn't (not entirely his fault). IL's we see about three weekly or more as they are half an hour away.

[catMandu]

I see my Mum about once a week, PIL's about 3/4 times a year, but they are at the other end of the country.

[Ineedmorechocolatenow]

Once every 6 weeks or so for my parents, but they live and hour and a half away. PIL live down the road and we see them every other week or so... sometimes more, sometimes less....

[cory]

We stay with my parents for Christmas and the summer holidays (though dh only goes for a shorter period in the summer). They sometimes come and visit us but more rarely. They do live across the North Sea, so we're doing the best we can. Speak to them on the phone once a week.

[insertwittynicknameHERE]

I see my mum about 4 times a week and my dad about 2-3 ish times a week. DH sees MIL once a week but occasionally will go 2-3 weeks in between seeing her. DH sees his dad once in a blue moon.