People who met someone and had a baby 35+

[LosingHope3]

I'm currently as single as can be. I have been unsuccessfully online dating for years, gets worse the older I get. I had relationships in my 20s which ended. I am approaching 35 and panicking I'm never going to have the opportunity to have a baby.

If anyone was single at 35, met someone and went on to have a first baby, can you please share your story here? Give me hope. I want to save the thread if I get some responses to look back on at times like today when I feel things look bleak and hopeless.

First date with my now partner dec 2021
Aged nearly 35

Miscarriage aged 36.5

But in the words of fertility consultant " i have no concerns about your fertility

I met DH when I was nearly 41. Had DS at 42 and DD at 45.
I had given up looking for a man and had decided to enjoy life, then DH appeared.

My DH appeared when I was 35, got married at 36, honeymoon baby. So it can happen.

OP, at 35 I was doing an international job having had my heart badly broken. Country hopping and avoiding everyone.

Then I came home at 42, started a new job, got together with the MD, and ds arrived three years later. Ds has just taken his GCSEs 🙂

Don't give up. Take up clay shooting. Or karate. Or sailing. (not all at the same time) Put yourself in new situations. Enjoy yourself. 😊

I was a tiny bit younger but close. Met my husband at 33 (nearly 34), first baby/married at 36, currently pregnant with 2nd baby at 37. I was like you, starting to give up hope. But it has all happened very quickly and I am so happy it has. I think that is the way it is for lots of people in their mid/late thirties- if it’s right you just move faster.

I met my partner at 35! Welcomed our baby boy in December last year, it can happen at any time and often when you'd least expect it 😊 I'd given up hope as I'd been single for nearly ten years prior to meeting him!

Met my husband at 36, married at 38, DD was born when I was just 39.

Freeze your eggs now if you can.

Met my now husband in the cheesiest of cheesy bars at 37, dd1 arrived just before 41st birthday, married at 41 and had dd2 at 43. It can happen!

I met my DH at 36 had DS at 39, although I do have much older DC too so not a first baby. However the older ones are 15+ years older, and I had been single a long time!

Met DH at 36, married at 38. DD born when I was 39 and DS when I was 40.
DD was conceived the first month we tried, as we had to delay trying as we honeymooned in a malaria country.
The month after I stopped breastfeeding DS was conceived before my period had returned!
I know I was fortunate to conceive so easily but I had no way of knowing I would. It's especially surprising as I was in menopause at 45 having been peri for 2-3 years prior.
DD is 17 now and DS is 16.
I met DH in a shop.

This! Or something like this - put yourself in new situations and shake it all up. I moved job and country at 35 after a major heartbreak. After a tough year I just thought sod it I'll make the best of whatever/wherever things take me, whatever they might be. Met exDP at 37, had DD at 42, split up at 44, met right DP at 47, and am very happy over a decade on. Good luck OP, there's no certainties in life, you really don't know what could be around the corner so you might as well enjoy the journey there.

I am looking at the schoolgate mums. Majority of them look over 50. So apparently you have tons of time

Were all of these pregnancies planned pregnancies?

Thank you so much for this thread. I have just split up with someone I was very in love with (I'm 32) as he decided he doesn't want children and I really would like to, if I can. This has given me a lot of hope too.

Not me but my dhs cousin met her dh at 35. Married within 18 months. She had her 2 children at 37 and 40. He's a couple of years older

Met DH on Match.com when I was 38, DD born when I was 40, married at 42. We both wanted to have a kid so decided to prioritise that over getting married. Quite happy with one DD so will never know whether conceiving a sibling would have been problematic or not. DD conceived as soon as my coil was removed. Good luck!

Dont give up hope. I met DP online dating at 36 and had DS at 38. DS is now a teen and whilst not always plain sailing we are still together!

Met my dp at 36 married at 39 and dd at 43.

Single at 35 after breaking up with long term BF when I was 33. Spent the next few years focusing on work, few short term relationships but nothing serious, was happy being single for the most part. Met DH when I was 38, married at 40, first DC at 41, currently pregnant with second DC. You have plenty of time, try not to stress!

Met DH in a choir at 37, married at 39, first DC at 39, DC 2 at 41, conceived v quickly both times, which I didn’t think was a given. I did move around a bit for work which maybe helped as I was meeting new people and had an exciting new role. I was working at still being hopeful while not appearing too keen too quickly! We just had loads in common but also being older we really appreciate each other and still feel so lucky to have found each other.

I would have been happy with just DH and at first he wasn’t interested in kids and that was fine but then he changed his mind and now he’s really glad we had them.

married over 20 yrs but I’m still having occasional nightmares about those years approaching 40 , single with no kids. I know I could have made the most of life without them but I’m glad I didn’t have to. I wake up sad thinking I’m coming up to 40 alone, then realise it’s just a bad dream and DH is lying next to me, and I’m much older! So, yes , it’s hard and I hope you find what’s right for you.

I was a few months shy of 35 when I met DH. Moved in together after a few months. Married when I was 38. I was pregnant at 40 (naturally, despite having been told by fertility doctors I would very likely need IVF).
DS just turned two. DH and I are happily married and love being a little family of three.
It can happen OP!

I get what you mean, but describing being single and childless approaching 40 as a 'bad dream' is likely to be very upsetting to those reading that who are in this situation.

I met DH at 38! We had our children when I was 40 and 43 - had pretty much given up all hope.

I am actually in tears reading this thread. I am 33, like OP ‘single as can be’, had a horrible bereavement in the last year and have moved back to my hometown (which I am loving but it’s scary at this age). You ladies give me hope.