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My reasons. I can't give in again

52 replies

IsItEnough · 17/06/2015 22:51

My 3 yr old asking me 'why daddy doesn't like you mummy'

My 3 yr old putting her hands over her ears and going 'aaaaaaaaa' cos daddy raised his voice.

My 3 yr old asking why is daddy angry again mummy

My 3 yr old whispering to me after he has left the house 'I don't want daddy to talk anymore'

Being told it's all my fault

Being screamed at because my memory of any event isn't the same as his and that must mean I'm calling him a liar

Being called a liar. A lot

Being ignored

Having any and all efforts rebuffed then being told how I never try. (Not talking sex. But everyday life)

Having to accept that things I don't like will be said to me and then when I'm upset being told to get a sense of humour. Lighten up.
Then having to endure him being upset that I am upset. And then that being my fault.
So being ignored for it.

Being told that he isn't ignoring me. That he just doesn't have anything to say.
Including hello, goodbye, thank you or are you ok etc.

Having him go from calm to tornado fury in a split second and being called all the names under the sun.

Never ever getting an apology.

Making me feel like a shit person when I'm not.

For refusing to let me have anyone at my own wedding ( I know I shouldn't have married him but I did. In an effort to prove my love)

Not being allowed to even talk about the future. Possible purchases or holidays because it makes him angry that he can't afford them at this very fucking second so we can't even talk about what we might like to do with our lives.

For moving himself onto the sofa because our 6 week old DS was disturbing him too much at night.

For complaining about sleeping on the sofa while I selfishly had the whole bed to myself.

For insisting DS be circumcised.

For not buying me a wedding ring for 3 years and belittling me by making out I was all about the material things.

For picking fights prior to every occasion. Birthdays, Valentine's, anniversaries. And thereby never getting me cards or gifts.

For saying I don't deserve gifts.

For pushing me when I was pregnant. Both times.

For keeping a picture of his first wife hidden away in his 'important documents' - it's not the photo that bothers me. It's the hidden and the temper tantrum that followed my finding it.

For always saying we will do things but never doing them.

For always being late for everything.

For hiding the fact he is an award winning bell end until after I was pregnant with dd.

For fooling me for so long.

I could go on and on.
But tonight I told him that he is a bully. And that I've endured as much as I can for my children's sake. But that it doesn't benefit them anymore so I want him gone.
He left in a temper but he will be back and then he will flatly ignore me until I give in.

Oh and it's the first day of Ramadan tomorrow and he is a Muslim so he will be 100 times more miserable then normal as he doesn't do Ramadan for the right reasons so he is a fucking grumpy surly Bomb waiting to go off for a month.

I don't love him. I don't even like him.

These are my reasons. And I will add things as I think of them to try to keep myself strong.

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Truly40 · 17/06/2015 22:57

It's more than enough. Don't give in, keeping adding to your list, and maybe give him a copy.
Stay strong xx