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Relationships

What can a husband do on Valentine's Day

17 replies

Fiona2011231 · 10/02/2014 10:52

Imagine you already have two children, both of you go to work every day. In this situation, is there anything romantic that a husband can do on Valentine's Day?

Your ideas are appreciated.

OP posts:
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JoinYourPlayfellows · 10/02/2014 10:55

How about nothing?

Because "being romantic" because it's the one day a year to "be romantic" is incredibly unromantic.

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noddyholder · 10/02/2014 10:56

We do nothing never have!

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craftynclothy · 10/02/2014 10:57

I don't go to work but we're having a nice meal together at home in the evening (a kit from The Spicery). Normally we'd just get little gifts or just cards but this year we're replacing our wedding rings (the old ones don't fit anymore and it was cheaper to buy new ones).

We usually use Valentine's Day as an excuse for takeaway and a film.

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MrsBennetsEldest · 10/02/2014 10:57

If mines got any sense he will stay away from me and not attempt any kind of reconciliation type shite.

Sorry, Venting...

As you were.

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Beamur · 10/02/2014 10:58

My DP always cooks me a really lovely meal on Valentines Day, we don't go out as it's vastly overpriced and we have a young child so would need to organise babysitter etc.
He does this every year, and whilst he does most of our cooking anyway, he researches something new and makes a special effort.
Valentines Day is a divider - some people like JoinYourPlayfellows has a point, but I rather like the notion of making one day just a little bit different and to make a point of saying to your partner that you love and value them.
If not food, perhaps there is something specific that your wife/husband/partner would appreciate?

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dannyboyle · 10/02/2014 10:58

Depends a bit on what is normal in your house. I am a sahm and husband has offered to (after kids in bed)! Run me a bath, pour me a glass of wine and cook me dinner). That will be special to me!

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uc · 10/02/2014 11:07

Yes. You could both make an effort. Candles on the table? Bottle of wine in the fridge? Cards for eachother? Bring home an M&S meal for 2? Make sure the kids are in bed early/on time, and then spend an evening watching a good movie and go to bed early? Leave a note on the fridge, whoever goes out first?

Lots of little things you could both do!

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Covalone78 · 10/02/2014 11:07

My DP told me not to buy her flowers for Valentine's - I wont, she got them on Saturday. We will however have a great meal together (she is a chef, I find it hard to persuade her to let me cook but am "allowed" on a Friday) and some good wine loads of chatting (interspersed with a generous sprinkling of kisses and cuddles) and some bedroom Olympics {sorry}. Just a normal Friday really!

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TeenyW123 · 10/02/2014 11:15

My husband really loves (my) home cooked chips. I haven't cooked any for ages because the chip pan was a bit scuzzy and I threw it out ages ago.

So, not to be led down the flowers and chocolates path, I've bought 'him' a new chip pan. I'll wrap it up and wrap up a bottle of veg oil and a couple of potatoes too to see if he can guess what I've bought him before the great unveiling.

We've been married for 13 years. I like (to give) a present that has a practical bent as well as fulfilling desires.

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BitOutOfPractice · 10/02/2014 11:46

We are just having a nice meal and cards. He's doing mains as he's a better cook than me. I'm making dessert

Which has suddenly reminded me to put the ingredients on the shopping list! Shock

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mrssnodge · 10/02/2014 11:57

We are both at work, and by the time I come home at 6, my Dsd (15)will be there for the weekend until 6pm Sunday- v.day is also the day that my DS (21) is moving out to a flat.! So no romance for us! maybe a takeaway & wine, with Dsd?

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NollaigShona · 10/02/2014 12:48

I wish I was married to Teeny.....(I love homemade chip)

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Twinklestein · 10/02/2014 12:49

Plenty of things OP! A dozen red roses, card, chocs...? Very easy to arrange.

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Joysmum · 10/02/2014 17:21

Why do people think you need to spend money? A lovely greeting when you see each other with a big hug, kiss and looking deep into each other's eyes saying you love each other and how lucky you are. A nice hit bubble bath, a gass of wine or hot choc and scented candles. Get the photos out, reminisce. Food you have to share. Romantic music etc etc

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Offred · 10/02/2014 17:52

I've got bf a mug with a picture of a heart... It says "I really fucking love you, you knobhead!" on one side and "" on the other.

I was a little perplexed to hear some of his friends saying they don't do anything and think it's a load of crap. I've heard them before talking about not bothering with people's birthdays etc. I think people all do it differently and it can lead to a fall out of misunderstanding if you're on different pages over it, which is exactly what happened one time when they didn't get a co-worker/friend anything for her birthday!

Maybe I'm too romantic but I like celebrating things like birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas and valentine's. I think it shouldn't replace making your partner feel generally loved but I think if you don't celebrate these things a partner or a good friend can feel unloved without that being your intention and I like to have the opportunity/excuse to give a present that shows I've thought about someone and care for them. I don't usually show love by giving gifts.

I think I'm a generally loving person and not the type to just make a half arsed effort by throwing some money at a special date which seems to be why his friends were objecting to valentine's.

Anything like valentines is as well as the stuff I do the rest of the time - massages, cuddling, saying "I love you", putting myself out in some ways to support a partner, thanking him for what he does for me, treating him sometimes, trying to make sure we get quality time together etc

I've told bf I've got him something little as it is our first valentine's and I wanted to make sure he wasn't embarrassed by assuming I wasn't getting anything for him. He asked if I wanted anything and I said no, which is true because the getting of anything random just for the sake of it isn't the point to me and I'd not get anything if I didn't have something thoughtful in mind. I also very much like giving gifts but hate getting them.

Getting him something took about 10 mins, cost less than £10 and is coming in the post but I hope he'll appreciate the thought I put in, which is really the point.

I think therefore it is pointless getting something just for the sake of it because that's just a waste of money. Anyone can do something for Valentine's but I don't think you should read too much into it if someone doesn't get you anything at all. The state of your relationship generally is more important and I can't see the point in asking for ideas of what someone else could get for you - that would take the love out of it for me and make it into a bit of an empty gesture.

It's a bit of a strange question though.

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MoominIsGoingToBeAMumWaitWHAT · 10/02/2014 18:12

Not married but I've got OH a card with a little googly-eye peanut saying "I'm nuts about you!", and a pack of chocolates with little bees on them and the tag says "Hey honey, please bee mine". It fits my personality so he knows it's personal, but more importantly, fits our relationship - we love cheesy puns and daft jokes.

I don't see celebrating Valentine's Day and loving your partner the rest of the year as being mutually exclusive. I love him all year round, it's just the shops are full of cards in February so it's an extra way to show it Grin

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HowAboutNo · 10/02/2014 18:34

We are saving for our mortgage so no cards and no presents.

Just picking a nice meal to cook together as we both have the day off.

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