Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

Advice needed, someones got a crush on ME

(443 Posts)
Usingtheplot Sat 02-Feb-13 09:40:10

This is probably going to sound really silly, but I'm hoping that someone,somewhere can help me deal with this very awkward situation I find myself in.
I'm a 43 year old single mom and work part time doing an incredibly boring job. That said, my colleagues are great and that makes things a little less tedious.I'm a very chatty and fairly confident person and find it easy to initiate conversation with even the most reserved people.
I have not been in a relationship for many years. This has not bothered me the slightest bit. I've not even had a serious romantic interest in a man.Friend s gave up trying to "pair me off" a long time ago and accept that I'm happy being single.
OK, I'll cut to the chase. One of the men at work, a senior member of staff,is someone I greatly admire. I often used to have a natter with him and I enjoyed his company. He's very popular,what you'd call a thoroughly nice man.We have a bit in common,but I wouldn't go so far as to say we were friends.We just shared a few light hearted chats ,nothing more. I didn't find him attractive,although I suppose he is quite good looking.
Recently though I've begun to dread meeting him at work,not because I don't want to see him or anything, but because he's acting like a love sick teenager when I'm around.
I don't know when it all started,it really took me by surprise.One day we were having our usual chat/banter and the next day he couldn't look me in the eye and was blushing furiously. It didn't help that I started blushing with embarrasment too.
I carried on my duties and decided this was a one off. When I passed his office I said hello etc and he blushed even more. I couldn't break the ice.This has continued for the past couple of weeks.He used to always say goodnight when he was leaving, but this has stopped. He avoids passing me in the corridor and when he does speak to me, he trips over his words and stammers.
I have to admit that I'm flattered by the fact he likes me, and I'm begining to think that I may like him too.
I really don't know why he's developed this crush on me. I've not said anything that would lead him on. I'm jovial but not outright flirty .
I just want to break this spell.

Usingtheplot Fri 15-Feb-13 20:47:09

My name isn't Franchesca

AnyFucker Fri 15-Feb-13 20:48:16

glad to hear it

Horsemad Sat 16-Feb-13 13:57:26

grin at the window cleaner seeing to your corners & knowing how to 'finish off'!!!!

ImperialBlether Sat 16-Feb-13 14:00:17

Glad to hear your name isn't Franchesca, because it's spelled Francesca!

ImperialBlether Sat 16-Feb-13 14:01:12

Why did he call you Franchesca then? That level of confusion as well as his shaking hands is making me worry about him!

Usingtheplot Sat 16-Feb-13 14:33:16

Couldn't use my real name could I?
I suspect he's had a reality check and decided that he can only be completely professional with me. ( still confused about the "touching" though)

Vakant Sat 16-Feb-13 14:52:08

Loving this thread grin

ImperialBlether Sat 16-Feb-13 16:06:47

OP, he really shouldn't be touching you at all. It sounds very unprofessional. If he wants a relationship with you outside work, he should suggest that to you and still not touch you at work, no matter what your response is.

AnyFucker Sat 16-Feb-13 16:30:05

If I was substituting a name for my real name, to assist the flow of my narrative, I would pick something easy like Sue or Lou or Kay, not Franchesca smile

Usingtheplot Sat 16-Feb-13 19:29:43

AnyFuker, are you a professional netmumber?? You seem to pop up everwhere.

donnasummer Sat 16-Feb-13 19:43:06

lol at netmumber

ImperialBlether Sat 16-Feb-13 19:46:20

She is the all-seeing eye, OP. I think many, many women have been grateful (eventually) for her advice. She makes you see it as it is, not how your husband wants you to see it.

AnyFucker Sat 16-Feb-13 19:57:31

I am not a member of Netmums !!

How very dare you ...

< actually I am, but I think my posting rights are "suspended" over there grin >

netmumber grin grin grin

flatbellyfella Sat 16-Feb-13 20:00:40

I can see AF with squinty eyes & cats bum face warming up.grin at missing C.

AnyFucker Sat 16-Feb-13 20:01:43

Ack, I'm kool about the missing C grin

As for " Tit rubs" I've never heard of them.

biscuit

GrannyRatOnAScooter Sat 16-Feb-13 20:33:52

What an interesting mental thread confused

kalidanger Sat 16-Feb-13 20:41:49

If you've seen him in 'a new light' why not ask him out for a drink?

Or is that too simple?

This thread is doing my swede in sad

Cerealqueen Sat 16-Feb-13 21:35:18

Mention you have a spare cinema/theatre/gig ticket as a friend can't go to something and at least you can see where you stand.
Nervewracking, but just go for it!

Soditall Sat 16-Feb-13 21:57:30

Just read all the way through.

So he asked you to do something you'd already been asked to do by someone else and it wasn't anything to do with him anyways and then he rubbed your shoulders.

He has a CRUSH on you!

He's making excuses to have physical contact with you.The rest of the time he's acting awkward around you.

I'm someone who never see's the signs that someone likes me,everyone else has to tell me.
But the things you've said I've had men be like that around me,especially the physical contact and acting awkward.For friends of the guys and friends of mine to tell me that they have a crush on me.

I just tried to make sure after that we weren't alone if it was avoidable.

Usingtheplot Sun 17-Feb-13 09:27:22

AnyFucker, you are not alone, I've had most of my posts on the "other" site,because they are deemed unfiit for the terribly PC brigade.

loopylou6 Sun 17-Feb-13 12:43:13

Oh dear.

OP may I kindly suggest you change your nn to LOSING the plot as I fear this is exactly what you are doing.

Your level of interest in this poor man is bordering on obsessive tbh.

UnrequitedSkink Sun 17-Feb-13 12:58:07

Oh for gods sake will you do us all a favour and just ask him out for a drink already?! If the poor guy blushes any more he'll probably have a heart attack.

ImperialBlether Sun 17-Feb-13 13:02:00

And if he gropes the staff any more, he'll get arrested!

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now