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Is this a normal way to speak for some men/ people ?

(112 Posts)
Domesticsloven Thu 17-Jan-13 23:27:18

Ds asked for a drink from dh tonight he is 10 . He does get his own drinks too. Dh said " get your own you little git " (shock) he was " joking" and meant he could get his own, apparently
WTF .

This is a professional man , why would he use a word like that to a child? It has really shocked me.

However I am quite genteel so AIBU ? (but to you nice reasonable relationships peeps)

Domesticsloven Thu 17-Jan-13 23:47:12

Pan , how can you tell ?

AnyFucker Thu 17-Jan-13 23:49:40

I would have said orthopaedic surgeon

Pan Thu 17-Jan-13 23:49:45

the long thread bit? Just that it looks like some threads where a poster asks quite a narrow question, and in responding to answers more and more troubling stuff comes out.

Apols if this isn't one of them. Still hmm at a doctor having such severe communication deficits.

AnyFucker Thu 17-Jan-13 23:50:50

I would have thought it was going to be a long thread since attracting red stuff from rocks can be an arduous business

MarcelineTheVampireQueen Thu 17-Jan-13 23:51:13

While I am sure we shouldnt call others name, Ive often said something like you cheeky fecker or some such in the home. For example, if my DS was sitting there and told me get him a drink, I would probably say" What did your last slave die of?! Get your own you lazy lump!" I am sure your 10 year old has heard and said worse than git.

Comparing it to child abuse is ridiculous and offensive imvho.

nametakenagain Thu 17-Jan-13 23:51:13

Yanbu. This is not ok.

AnyFucker Thu 17-Jan-13 23:52:06

extracting

Domesticsloven Thu 17-Jan-13 23:52:29

Should have been an orthopod true.

Domesticsloven Thu 17-Jan-13 23:54:24

Sorry am tired yet concerned and on annoying keyboard. Last night only had 5 hr sleep and in for 7 tomoz

Domesticsloven Thu 17-Jan-13 23:54:58

Verbal abuse .

Domesticsloven Thu 17-Jan-13 23:56:12

Lazy lump is fine tho isn't it no comparison.

tigerdriverII Thu 17-Jan-13 23:59:31

I would say something like that to my DS - not the same words but probably "lazy little bugger" or similar. But if nothing has been said like that and this is new, yes it might be a bit odd. However at that age they know all sorts from the playground so I wouldn't sweat it too much

Pan Fri 18-Jan-13 00:00:21

agree it's verbal abuse. If I used that word to dd in any tone she would just stare dumbfounded at me.

MarcelineTheVampireQueen Fri 18-Jan-13 00:00:43

Calling a child a git once is not verbal abuse. It might not be the best thing to call someone but it is not verbal abuse.

Domesticsloven Fri 18-Jan-13 00:01:23

Ok fair enough . Not a word I would expect an adult to use to a child but there we go .

AngelWreakinHavoc Fri 18-Jan-13 00:02:09

I often call my ds a lazy git. I dont find it offensive. should I google what it means?

AngelWreakinHavoc Fri 18-Jan-13 00:04:25

I googled and yes what I call my ds is true grin


1. A completely ignorant, childish person with no manners.

AngelWreakinHavoc Fri 18-Jan-13 00:04:59

He is 15 btw.

AnyFucker Fri 18-Jan-13 00:05:06

< tries a different approach >

How long has he been verbally abusing your son ? Is this a recent thing ? Is he trying to make a "man" of him, now he is growing up a bit ? Was his own father the same kind of patriarchal and arrogant cock of the family (common in medical circles) ?

Please can you answer clearly if this is a sudden beginning of stuff you are concerned about or if he has always been like this. If he has always been like this, why is it bothering you now (bearing in mind your son is 10yo)

MarcelineTheVampireQueen Fri 18-Jan-13 00:06:04

I google and urban dictionary has some interesting takes on it, sometimes it is meant offensively and sometimes it is said with affection.

Honestly, if that is the extent of it all OP I wouldnt worry. If there is more then say so.

If we all told you that you were right, what would you do? Would you look for an apology for your son? Would you take yourself and your son away from what you see as a verbally abusive relationship? You are not happy with what he said, how do you propose to resolve it?

LesBOFerables Fri 18-Jan-13 00:06:30

I remember reading a 'humorous' book about toddlers years ago when my eldest was a baby, called How To Be A Little Sod. So yes, I think in a lighthearted way, words on a par with 'git' are normal enough ^if used in humour and with affection. If spat out with contempt, then obviously no.

AnyFucker Fri 18-Jan-13 00:07:18

I think Op simply wants a few people to say "that is horrid" and that's the extent of it.

Am I wrong, OP ?

LesBOFerables Fri 18-Jan-13 00:08:37

if used with humour and affection

AngelWreakinHavoc Fri 18-Jan-13 00:11:45

How did your ds react op? did he git get himself a drink?

ZooAnimals Fri 18-Jan-13 00:14:24

I think it depends on tone and normal usage of the word.

To me git is fairly harmless. I hear it a lot when people are affectionately having a go about their DC's as in 'he's a cheeky git/get'. It also makes me think of The Royle Family, I think Jim calls Anthony 'a lazy git' a few times.

Fool is even less offensive, and widely used as a jokey insult when someone has done something a bit stupid.

So I wouldn't say either are even remotely close to child abuse. Having said that, if your DH would never normally use those words/wasn't joking then I suppose it's a different matter.

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