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support for emotional eaters!!

(149 Posts)
DippyDoohdah Mon 06-Aug-12 20:22:42

Having had some really solid support on MN, I thought itwould be worth seeing if there are many other women who find themselves eating in order to occupy their minds, temporarily console themselves and to keep feelings pushed down!? Its got to the point where I have gone from voluptuous to matronly..not feeling my za za zing anymore! Really need to address weight for my health.its the evenings where I sit and pick, think, and also the evenings when I go on MN..so I thought, combine the two, and anyone else who sees something like this in themselves? Maybe we can support each other.smile

DippyDoohdah Mon 06-Aug-12 21:19:27

Anyone? Or is it just me?! biscuit

BonkeyHasGOLDMollocks Mon 06-Aug-12 21:20:38

You might find you get some more support over in the Big/slim/whatever topic smile

Concentrateonthegood Mon 06-Aug-12 21:22:06

Oh thank god someone has posted on this subject. Not just you, me too and at the moment, my eating is out of control. A mental health professional friend has suggested I go to the doctors and get help for my depression and maybe putting me on Prozac can have a calming effect of this type of behaviour. I get low grade depression but been struggling since Christmas and it's not leaving me but the weight is creeping up.

skyebluesapphire Mon 06-Aug-12 21:23:51

I've lost three stone on the " my husband walked out" diet, but am still I erweight, could do with losing at least another three... I was pleased to lose it but now some evenings I do pick at stuff (currently munching a bag of revels blush )

I need to lose more, not put more back on!

javotte Mon 06-Aug-12 21:24:07

I am an emotional eater. I've lost (and put back on) between 300 and 400lbs in the past 11 years. I know if I eat because I'm hungry or because I'm upset / bored / sad, but I cannot stop. I'm pregnant so no dieting, but I'd love to lose 40-50lbs after baby is born.
I'm a SAHM and a bit of a work widow ATM so I'm often on MN.

DippyDoohdah Mon 06-Aug-12 21:43:40

bonkey thanks..could not find anywhere like that but as a few replies now and as I very much see it tied up to struggling to deal with feelings over relationships, may let it float here x
Concentrate..glad I started thread then! I have had Prozac before. It did help to suppress appetite, although prescribed for depression, but personally I decided it was not the best long term for me.could certainly be worth a try, especially if getting worse.I read a book called "women, food and God"
Its not religious actually but is about emotional eating..maybe I should get it out again!
Skye that's a horrible way for you to have to lose weight..of you are on your own on the evening its harder to,I am and that's when I have no social inhibitions!
Bless you javotte..it's good to be aware of but most important now is being healthy for you and your baby
Are you going to bf? That always helps waistlines!
I am just trying to zone out of a stressful job, being in my own with 2 young dcs, having night mare neighbours and no social life! I want to get my focus back..have lost three stone before..so I feel in control of life again, then maybe I will have energy to jump on Wii fit!

BeatriceBean Mon 06-Aug-12 21:46:35

I am v overwieght and certainly eat for emotional reasons. I know I need to sort those out rather than "diet" as such but not entirely sure how...!

I'm not very happy at the moment, chronically tired, alone with 2 kids a lot...

fhdl34 Mon 06-Aug-12 21:50:34

I'm an emotional eater but getting pregnant last year after 4 years TTC just seemed to flick a switch in my brain and I didn't need to do it anymore. I worried the desire would return after my DD arrived and it did. I've slipped a few times but am so much better than I was. Pre-pregnancy I weighed 23st and I managed to pretty much stick to that weight during pregnancy, save a few lbs at the end. I've now lost 5 stone through breastfeeding and healthy eating but every day I get the urge to binge around mid afternoon until I go to bed. Although I've lost a lot, I still need to lose about another 8-9 stone to be in a healthy weight range but right now I'm concentrating on eating healthy (helps that my DD is weaning right now and so I want to eat healthy with her) and if I decide to have chocolate or crisps I'm making different choices (a chomp bar instead of a 150g bar of chocolate, baked wotsits instead of walkers crisps). I was about to write that this really isn't like me but why the hell shouldn't it be me? I don't want to pass my bad habits to my daughter, I want her to have a sensible attitude to food and not need food as a crutch as I do.
I think about food all the time, it's a struggle everyday not to buy a big cake (at the moment my thoughts are consumed with cake) but I finally got what I wanted, I am a mum and I want to enjoy it. We're doing BLW and thinking that my DD should eat what I eat stops me eating rubbish at the moment and if I have a chocolate bar, I won't eat it in front of her. She's only 7 months at the moment and she will no doubt try chocolate before long but at the moment trying to establish healthy foods.
Thanks for starting this thread

javotte Mon 06-Aug-12 21:50:57

dippydoohdah I've been breatsfeeding non-stop since 2007! (I'm expecting DC3). It does help a lot, especially in the first weeks / months after birth when I feel a little high and tend to undereat, but I always revert to my binge-eating mode.
I am very overweight but luckily I'm having a textbook pregnancy.
Good night to you all!

skyebluesapphire Mon 06-Aug-12 22:01:27

When I gave birth I was 10kg lighter than when I got pregnant due to severe morning sickness and loss of appetite.

My H walked out at Easter and my appetite vanished. I lost three stone in three months.

hatesponge Mon 06-Aug-12 22:08:20

I'm an emotional eater. My ExP was abusive, in 7 years with him I put on 7 stone.

I managed to lose almost 5 stone last year, but the ongoing utter disaster that is my love life means I have put at least a stone of that back on now.

I got binned off by my latest 'interest' by text today which has caused me to eat (among other stuff) 3 bags of crisps, 2 chocolate doughnuts and a (small) bag of Minstrels blush I'd eat more if there was anything left. It's the only thing that makes me feel, if not happy, then at least a bit better sad

DippyDoohdah Mon 06-Aug-12 22:16:20

Beatrice..looks like you and I are on very similar pages! Am starting counselling on Thursday, although am finding MN very helpful for the issues that ate getting me down too
Fhdl..thanks for your post.sound like you have done amazingly and are obviously inspired by your ds.really important...my mum is an emotional eater and I think (without blaming her as she is also fab) that I have learnt from her to an extent..it's an attitude isn't it? If someone is low, if it's a celebration, just about any reason, she shows her caring by giving food.the gap between me and her used to be about 7 stone, but I have increase and she has decreased and we are about a stone apart....so you are doing hoops by your ds to start showing her different messages..maybe "fake it till you feel it" will work for you and you will take up your own lead.night girls!

fhdl34 Mon 06-Aug-12 22:35:40

You're so right dippy, any emotion can be a reason to eat for me. I was in counselling before I got pregnant, trying desparately to resolve why I eat like I do. I just couldn't get anywhere near the nuts and bolts of it. I was so used to automatically eating to stuff those feelings down that I didn't even know what they were, I still don't! I just knew they were so awful and terrifying I couldn't bear them. I was so happy to be pregnant and that I didn't celebrate by eating. It was like because I was told I wouldn't conceive naturally, because I did, that was what I needed to know and at that point, it was enough to stop me doing it.
But now every day I think about food in an unhealthy way, I just rarely act on it. I told my counsellor that I thought I'd end up back there some day to resolve these issues but once I got pregnant, I wanted to enjoy that like a normal person would, not an overweight emotional eater so I stopped the counselling. I came off my ADs around the same time, I'd been on them about 4 years. I take one day at a time, it's hard but you're right, at the moment my daughter inspires me.

DippyDoohdah Mon 06-Aug-12 22:36:38

Aagh hatesponge, if he did that by text he was not worthy of a relationship any way! Know what you mean about feeling better/distracted, but then for me it's later when I see bits wobbling that should not be there,I get cross with myself for worsening my situation again!

hatesponge Mon 06-Aug-12 22:41:27

I get cross with myself too, but I find it's a vicious circle, the crosser I get, the sadder I feel and the more I want to eat.

I know when I was with ExP and we argued, and I got upset I would eat almost until I was sick just to stop it all hurting.

What scares me most now is putting back on all the weight I lost last year. I keep planning to go running in the evenings but never do, it's easier to sit on the sofa, feel sad and eat. Not good sad

DippyDoohdah Tue 07-Aug-12 06:23:41

Could you not just break it down to easier steps?..go out for a walk this evening and have a bit more of a think about the pattern you are in, how it leaves you feeling and then think about how it feels to be out walking?..do this a few times and then, when ready, turn it into a light jog.make mountains into little series of hills to climb... No pressure to run yet.x

Alliwantisaroomsomewhere Tue 07-Aug-12 07:47:02

I need to join here, too.....sad

Will be back a bit later.

javotte Tue 07-Aug-12 07:49:48

hatesponge I'm so sorry! I agree that going for a simple walk may be a good idea. Being outside can be very helpful. 9 years ago I put on 70lbs in 3 months (eating about 10,000kcal/day) and I managed to broke the cycle by going for a daily walk.
dippy I also think I got my unhealthy attitude to food from my mother. Mine is borderline anorexic.

Firebird20 Tue 07-Aug-12 10:05:56

I didn't find Prozac did anything to supress my appetite or emotional eating but maybe it will work for others.

SoleSource Tue 07-Aug-12 11:19:22

Emotional eater here too. I am going to join AA even tgough I am not a drinker of alcohol as I have heard over eaters use it too.

Guiltypleasures001 Tue 07-Aug-12 11:54:05

Hi ladies can I join?

I am in the final stages of training to be a counsellor, and with my own personal therapy I have worked out that I comfort eat. it goes in stages so I should say I binge.

I moved to an area to be close to parents because they retired, and I have 1 son their only grandchild ( im an only child) and I barely know anyone, hence I have found myself over the last 4 years of living here practicly institutionalised.
It's so much easier to stay in and do what I call potter around, and if you do it for long enough, the weeks months fly by. I get out and about now, but still not as much as I used to and the weight has now got out of control for me, I am gutted and have no idea what to do about it a anymore.

Cant seem to find the mojo to deal with it, its like this mountain that is so huge now I have no will to look at it yet alone tackle it sad

I was always a lot slimmer when single, and thought it was the men fuckwits that I was with, but have a lovely 2nd dh who worships the ground I walk on, but still cant get my head around my diet blush

anyway hi from me grin

Guiltypleasures001 Tue 07-Aug-12 11:58:08

Oh please dont tell me I have killed another thread, seems to be a habit of mine

SoleSource Tue 07-Aug-12 12:07:50

Guilty maybe someone ate it lol

fhdl34 Tue 07-Aug-12 12:12:04

Hi guiltypleasure I haven't binged in ages but the urge is there everyday. I'm working on not feeling guilty if I have a piece of cake or chocolate bar. Is your DH big? Mine is and whilst I've managed to persevere with the work I started on my portion control when I was pregnant, he still binges to some extent. We used to do it together but now I always keep my daughter in mind, I won't eat like that in front of her, just Hope I can keep it up. Have you had any counselling for yourself?

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