Orange Is The New Black in Ambridge. Just ask Helen. But will anyone in The Archers ever ask her WHY?

(982 Posts)

MNHQ have commented on this thread.

PseudoBadger Sun 12-Jun-16 16:42:48

I reckon this thread will see us through the Euros, both footy and referendum. Await the clunky topical inserts here.

BYOSnowman Sun 12-Jun-16 16:46:15

It will see us through to Xmas if things don't pick up!

kitchenunit Sun 12-Jun-16 17:25:33

Checking in. Thanks Pseudo.

babybarrister Sun 12-Jun-16 17:30:52

Apologies if it has already been commented on, but the legal aspects of the family dispute are now verging on the fantastical ....

1. The QC keeps ringing up Helen - this would NEVER happen - Helen's contact with her lawyers would be through her solicitor, even if she were paying for this herself, which presumably she is as she cannot rely on the DV exemption for legal aid as she has not revealed that she has been suffering from DV

2. The QC keeps referring to custody which was legislated out of existence in 1989 when the Children Act came in and "residence" was introduced. In 2014 "residence" was also got rid of and we now have Child Arrangement Orders referring to who a child lives with - for a relatively young child to be using the term "custody" like an elderly lay client is simply unrealistic ....

3. If the QC had half a brain she would not have dismissed Helen's worry about breast feeding but encouraged it as it is the only thing Helen has going for her vis a vis Jack .......

and breathe!

babybarrister Sun 12-Jun-16 17:32:03

should say for a relatively young QC!

EBearhug Sun 12-Jun-16 18:28:27

I assume Anna must be around mid-40s at the very youngest - Carol and John were Phil's contemporaries, back when Grace was around.

EBearhug Sun 12-Jun-16 18:33:06

1969 she was born, so 46 or 47. Carol would have been 35 then.

(I googled.)

BoreOfWhabylon Sun 12-Jun-16 18:42:44

Sorry babybarrister, but you must be mistaken. After all, SOC consulted closely with legal experts - he told us so.

And thanks, as always, Pseudo

KingscoteStaff Sun 12-Jun-16 19:04:48

Splendid new thread. Thankyou.

Does Bert pay rent for the bungalow? Do the Fairbrethren pay rent to him?
If Bert snuffs it, do TRex get squatters' rights?

Minimammoth Sun 12-Jun-16 19:26:41

Place marking. Ta Pseudo.

Gruach Sun 12-Jun-16 19:27:58

So. Carol's broken wrist. Looks like Anna will be moving in for months.

Longing to see who they'll pair her up with.

Thank you Pseudo - fabulous as always.star

BlackeyedSusan Sun 12-Jun-16 19:39:04

well it figures that as the premise of the story is based on reare events then the legal stuff is not going tobe accurate either.

kitchenunit Sun 12-Jun-16 19:52:09

Would Anna and Rex be a possible challenge to PipNRex? Or Pippex as they now are in my head?

BYOSnowman Sun 12-Jun-16 19:54:58

They are PiRex in my head

She's probably a bit old for him and I can't imagine she would be interested in fooling around with Toby.

Single men over 40? Could be Alastair soon enough. Or she might take dr bore off our hands?

Gruach Sun 12-Jun-16 19:56:41

Bland, passive Rex (28 -ish) and supposedly sharp, brainy Anna (47-ish)?

Wouldn't waste your money ...

Gruach Sun 12-Jun-16 20:00:51

Does it have to be a man BYOS?

And rather dull if the person is currently single. Won't they at least attempt to wring some drama out of her Ambrudge residency?

Marchate Sun 12-Jun-16 20:02:27

Alastair? DocLocke? Wayne?

kitchenunit Sun 12-Jun-16 20:02:31

Is Roy still around?

BYOSnowman Sun 12-Jun-16 20:03:40

I thought she was heartbroken over being dumped by a man?

Only problem with her having a relationship with a woman is that the only lesbians in the village are Kirsty and Helen apparently

Or maybe this is where Kathy come back? Or we are subjected to Lizzie having another sexual awakening.

Well Alastair is married!

Abraiid1 Sun 12-Jun-16 20:05:05

What has Anna done to deserve that, Kitchen?

BYOSnowman Sun 12-Jun-16 20:05:16

Oh god. Please not Wayne. Soap cliche - person of the law falling for someone from the wrong side of the tracks

AugustaFinkNottle Sun 12-Jun-16 20:07:14

Doesn't the domestic violence rule about legal aid only apply to family law? So presumably the family are paying for the legal work about the children, but not about the criminal charges?

Minimammoth Sun 12-Jun-16 20:16:47

Anna will bump into Rob and fall for him.

BYOSnowman Sun 12-Jun-16 20:18:21

So Helen will get off on a technicality because her defence barrister is shagging the victim?

Gruach Sun 12-Jun-16 20:19:36

Mini - I've been trying so hard not to allow space in my mind for such a horrible thought.

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