Pregnancy symptoms stopped at nine weeks - so worried

[Heidi28]

Hi lovely Mumsnetters. This has to be the best Mum (and Dad's) site anywhere so I've come here this morning after an upsetting experience.

I'm 9 weeks +3 days pregnant and have just turned 40 years old. Three days ago my preganancy symptoms (acute nausea and sickness, very sore breats, exhaustion etc) just vanished and I'm feeling completely normal now. I have no cramping or bleeding.

I have one four-year-old daughter and have had three previous miscarriages including a missed miscarriage about a year ago. The last time I miscarried the same thing happened - all my symptoms just stopped. Three days later I began to miscarry.

With this (very much wanted) pregnancy I have had an early scan, due to bad abdominal pain in week 6, but a heartbeat was found and everything looked ok.

I called my out-of-hours GP service for advice this morning and our local early pregnancy unit called back an hour later. I described my situation exactly as above - the response I received was "So what are you worried about? I can't tell you if you're miscarrying or not. If you're that worried go to A&E."

I don't know what else I expected, and I am probably living in a mist of paranoia having lost three prior pregnancies, but I feel really upset by the so-called "advice" I received. I now feel foolish about going to A&E about something that seems so trivial to an expert at hospital.

We are meant to be going away for a long weekend and I am torn. I am so afraid of miscarrying while we are away but don't want to disappoint my family either. My next scan is not for another three weeks. Sorry for the long post. There are many people here in much more difficult situations than mine but I am so confused and worried. This baby is so longed for.

Thanks for "listening". Just had to write this down somewhere I knew that people would understand. x x x

[stuffitllama]

Hi heidi I know how worried you are and how much you want to feel sick again. (have had three mc)

I don't know what the situation is with maternity units now but if I were you I would want a scan and would request an extra one. Is it impossible?

at the response from the unit, maybe you got the end of the night shift or someone who doesn't want to be there on Saturday. Bloody awful that it's not recognised how upsetting suspected mc is.

I would phone on Monday and try to get an earlier scan.

[SheWillBeLoved]

Please try not to worry

My last pregnancy ended in a MMC. It was my first, and I wasn't aware that symptoms just dissapearing was a bad thing. We went to my 12 week scan expecting to see our baby bouncing around, but instead were told a baby never even formed.

This pregnancy, i've had zero symptoms, and had bleeding at 6 weeks. It was hell getting to the 12 week stage to find that everything, thankfully, was just fine.

Symptoms, especially at around 9 weeks, can sometimes dissapear for a few days or so. They normally come back with a vengeance from what i've heard! Try not to stress about it too much, and go away and enjoy yourselves. Staying home and worrying yourself sick, unfortunately won't change the outcome of things whether they're good or bad.

Got everything crossed for you x

[stuffitllama]

Yes I was going to say I remember a disappearance of symptoms with the first pregnancy that lasted but then thought -- surely not I must be remembering wrong, as they did come back big time. Also I'm not sure they completely disappeared, but they definitely receded and I spent a lot of time lying down until they came back.

Good luck Heidi x

[brettgirl2]

I found that my symptoms came and went - I nearly drove myself mad over it. I hope it works out for you.

[FiveGoMadInDorset]

I had no symptons from 5 weeks with both so try not to worry, easy to say but difficult to do I know.

[nelix2000]

Hi there, please don't worry send happy hormones to your baby. With my first, I had a week of sickness at week seven, that was it. No other pregnancy sypmtoms for the rest of the pregnancy bar him moving and eventually sore boobs at 8 months. This pregnancy is the total opposite, I am a cow most of the time, been sick for 20 weeks. I am have a girl this time, My first was a son. Not that this makes a difference but maybe slightly reassuring. My sister never had symtoms of her fist pregnancy either

[ConfusedMama]

Stuff their snotty attitude, it's YOUR baby, YOUR body, YOUR peace of mind here.

There are no prizes for not making a fuss if you feel you have reason to. The EPU/A&E are not going to think "How nice of Heidi28 not to bother us"! There are PLENTY of people who "bother" the medical services for far far less than what you are worrying about. You have every right to use the services on offer if you feel that's what you need. You and your LO are the priority, who cares what anyone thinks as long as you are OK.

There's no reason you shouldn't have a scan IMO, especially given your history. I would be tempted to go down to your local unit and press for one. Don't be shy. Get your mind put at rest.

FWIW I had exactly the same feelings on and off - ie it's all slowed down/gone away. Am now nearly at end of term with 1st pg

Thinking of you x

[2manychips]

Heidi,we're due around the same time-I was 10 weeks yesterday and was just discussing with my dh that I was concerned my short spell of nausea(about a week) has seemed to have stopped. I had 4 mths of it with dd. Have had 2 scans already but worrying more than ever as I had v early m/c in June. My next scan is Fri 13th! Sorry I cant advise but just wanted to say you're not alone.

[duchesse]

Our experience with out of hours GP services has always been less than glorious. I am sorry you have this worry hanging over you. Only a scan can give you the answers. In your shoes I would be paranoid too (and was in my third pregnancy when my symptoms all disappeared at 9 weeks on the dot- child 3 was born perfectly healthy at 42 weeks). Please try (easier said than done of course) not to worry too much about it but go to your EPU on Monday morning for a scan. I hope it's all OK for you.

[neolara]

Is there anywhere local where you can have a private scan? It might put your mind at rest. Some EPUs are much forthcoming about offering reassurance scans that others. Or maybe you could say you felt some pain or had bleeding. That might make them more willing to see you. I would also second ringing on Monday when they might have better staffing arrangements. Lots of EPUs don't seem to be open at the weekends.

I posted a similar thread to yours about 3 years ago. I had loads of posters replying that their symptoms had also disappeared for a few days, only to return with a vengence. This is what happened to me and I went on to have my son. I do understand what a worrying time it is. I've had 4 mc and am now 9 weeks pregnant again. I really hope you wake up tomorrow feeling sick as a dog! Good luck.

[SpecialOffer]

My symptoms disappeared at about 8 weeks, and I worried like mad. Managed to speak to my midwife and told me I was lucky. Didn't stop me worrying and spent the next few weeks uneasy. I am now 13+6 and heard so many people tell me the same thing happened to them!

[MustHaveaVeryShortMemory]

I posted almost exactly the same title about 7 weeks ago. Sickness came back with a vengeance a week later...! Now 15 weeks and 12 week scan was fine. I think this is quite common and having seen a heartbeat is a very positive sign. Good Luck.

[Heidi28]

Thank you so, so much every one of you for your kind and understanding messages. Now I know why I love this place on the web.

We did go away for the weekend in the end (just got back before the snowfall tonight) and we had a magical time. I felt so much better than I would have done if I'd stayed at home and stewed.

I'm feeling much more positive thanks to the break and your encouraging messages. I'll see my Doctor tomorrow morning and push for another scan and will let you know how it goes.

Sending "happy hormones" (thanks nelix2000) and blessings to the expectant Mums here (especially 2manychips due at the same time), all of you who have gone through the heartbreak of miscarriage or loss, and all those who came through the anxiety to deliver their beautiful children. Lucky kids having such loving and caring Mummies.

You are wonderful. Thank you so much. Heidi28. x x x

[abigport]

Any news Heidi28? Same thing happened to me, and I felt quite worried, but then symptoms (plus more!) came back with a vengeance a few days later, and everything worked out fine(37wks today). Hope that this is what happened to you, I can understand how it must be stressful (and rude medical staff don't help), hope that you get reassurance soon!

[dan39]

I had a mmc at 8 weeks, discovered at 12 week scan and I felt sick thru those last weeks too even tho it had died. Sickness isn't always an indication that things good - so no sickness isn't necessarily bad!!

Hope you got somewhere today?

[drewie]

Sorry to hear that you are worried. I had MMC last year which was discovered at 9 week dating scan and I did not miscarry until 15 weeks. It is heartbreaking. But you should remember that towards the end of the 1st trimester pregnancy symptoms do usually stop. Do you have an early pregnancy unit near you? I found my doctors very unhelpful but the EPU were fantastic. Some EPUs you can just walk into if you are concerned. Visit www.earlypregnancy.org.uk/whoarewe.asp to see if there is one in your area. Good luck.

[SydneyB]

Oh poor poor you, how worrying. Do try not to worry too much though. Had EXACT same thing when pg with DD and DS and a week later when I was vomming again I just wished I hadn't worried, but just enjoyed it. I'm no expert but once they find a heartbeat you really don't need to worry as much do you? Easy for me to say I know. Hope it all works out for you x

[clouiseg]

Hi Heidi, so sorry to hear you are having to worry about this. If it is any consolation I have had very similar experiences to you...

I had 3 MCs (& ERPC) in a row, the most recent in April 2008. I had varying experiences with each loss. My 2nd was appalling and I was even asked if I was certain I wasnt just having a 'heavy period'! We moved to a new county before the last MC and what a MASSIVE difference in the way we were treated! The EPAU made me feel at ease & basically told me that despite SOME poor reactions, they get paid the same wage whether we sit at home and worry or pop in for a quick scan! Puts it in perspective?

After you have been through MC you will naturally worry, but you are not to blame for what happened so please do not feel ashamed of asking for extra reassurance!

I am currently 35 weeks pregnant and experienced the same as you early on in this PG. I woke up one day @ 9 weeks and realised I had NO symptoms whatsoever. I convinced myself that something was wrong and got straight on the phone to a very unhelpful GP. After being made to feel a bit silly I refused to be put off! I rang the EPAU direcctly, explained my history and TOLD them I needed a scan asap or I would go out of my mind! They were very understanding and booked me for the next day. At the scan, everything was fine. Apparently, the HCG levels peak at around 9 weeks and then drop fairly quickly, levelling out after that. This can cause a loss of symptoms. That said, the nausea came back with a vengeance a week or 2 later! And here I am ready to pop.

I suppose the moral of the story is, don't EVER feel that you need to sit & worry. You deserve some support and compassion from the EPAU, so don't be put off by some jobsworth who has probably NEVER suffered the trauma of a miscarriage. And if all else fails, remember, once you get to 12 weeks you won't see them again (its up to routine antenatal after that!) lol

I truly wish you & your partner all the luck in the world and am sending you lots of positive vibes! Please let us know how it goes tomorrow, and in the meantime try to distract yourself as much as possible. XX

[Heidi28]

Hi again sunshine women. I'm sorry it has taken me a while to return and post an update. It actually took me longer than I thought to build up the courage to ask for support on this. I'd convinced myself I was making an unnecessary fuss.

However, I met with an angel of a consultant today when I had my first antenatal appointment. When she heard my situation she slotted me in for an immediate scan, right at the end of the day today. The NHS hosiptal staff on this occasion couldn't have been kinder. Thank you so much Roberta, Karen and Peter.

To my relief and joy I am now 11 weeks pregnant and have a scan image of my active little one. They even managed to do all the nuchal tests for me today as well.

I just wanted to say that if it wasn't for all of you here I think I would have gone slightly mad with worry during the past couple of weeks. Never underestimate how much the time you take to respond to a message here means to someone else. I have been so moved and helped by your kindness.

drewie, I am truly sorry about your loss and, in light of that, how generous of you to share the helpful link - thank you. I hope your baby dreams work out for you.

clouiseg, thank you for the wisdom and compassion you showed in your post. I wish I had read it earlier but I wanted to endorse every word you've written for anyone else who comes to this thread with the same worries. After all the heartache you've been through you deserve the most straightforward and wonderful birth - good luck and do share the happy news so we can give your baby son or daughter a warm welcome to the world.

I can't remember who said that the deeper sorrow digs into your heart the more joy it can contain - I hope that's true.

With heartfelt thanks to all of you - and hope to see you on the boards again soon. With love, Heidi28. x x x

[Fozzie78]

Heidi28 thats fab news im so pleased for you, ive been following your post and it is so nice to hear good news xx

[clouiseg]

Awwwww Heidi thats AMAZING news! I've been checking in to see how you are....I actually welled up when I read about how it went (although I'm sure my hormones have a lot to do with that too lol)!

Bless you too for your kind words. I am over the moon that you have had some reassurance and seen your little one. All it takes is one compassionate member of staff and all of a sudden your mind is at ease and you can move on. Its such a shame that these days compassion is such a rare thing eh? Thankfully we have mumsnet to keep us all going!!

Your happiness is well deserved and I bet you'll be on here sharing third trimester gripes with the other ladies before you know it!!

XXX

[Kittykatc24]

I know this post is old but I wanted to reply in case any other pregnant ladies out there are using it to set their mind at rest. I am 9weeks and 5 days pregnant and 4 days ago I woke up and ALL of my pregnancy symptoms had gone. I spent the next few days worrying and using boards such as this to find out if this is normal and, whilst it is normal for some symptoms to fluctuate. It isn't normal for them all to suddenly disappear overnight. The only way to describe it is I went to bed feeling pregnant and woke up not feeling pregnant anymore. I've had a scan and the baby has died and she said the date coincides with the day my symptoms stopped. So please everyone get yourself checked out if you have any unusual or worrying signs.

[Lauren899]

Hi, I’m 9 weeks pregnant and had symptoms come and go for a few days but I’ve noticed that they have gone completely now and worried, iv had 2 mc before and need advice if this has happened to anyone else?

[Jummynbean]

@lauren899 I'm in the same boat as you x hope everything turned out okay x

[DrSushi]

This thread is still helping mother’s-to-be around the world! I don’t know how I can stop worrying after we had a MC in October.. I try to relax into “what-will-be-will-be” and leave it to the universe, but it is so hard when I don’t feel any twinges I’m used to to let me know that my uterus is expanding, or have any nausea now, it has been replaced by hunger mostly, and otherwise I feel pretty great at the moment touch wood. I just can’t shake the feeling of fear and keep wondering “have i had a MM?”.. despite being a doctor myself, the anxiety of motherhood has already begun and no amount of science and education is going to reduce that. For now I’m going to wait until my next scan in 2 weeks - with this current Covid-19 pandemic there’s so many risks all around, hoping everything will be alright. Best wishes to you all!