What do you DO when you are feeling sick, exhausted and you still have 2 preschoolers to look after?

[fillyjonk]

I mean, what are you meant to DO?

No part of my situation is going to change. 2 days is max for ds at nursery, dd not at nursery, dp not using holiday so he can take it after dp born.

NO family locally and also-complex situation with failed IVF of relative on one side and anticipated "oh for god's sake, AGAIN?" rxn on the other (pil could find some depressing news in a lottery win) means I am holding back on sharing the news anyway.

aaargh

friends all lovely but snowed under with own kids. And already feel overwhelmed by fact I have TWO (mostly they all have one). So no joy there.

aaargh. I think I am just ranting really.



I am SURE it was not this bad last time or time before

[lulumama]

nap when your DD naps or lies down.....go to bed as soon as the children go to bed......when you feel good, stock up freezer with good meals....tell your friends if they offer to help, you will take them up on it! and it usually only lasts a few weeks, the exhaustion

[fillyjonk]

ta lulu

last time i was sick on and off to 5 months, and the tiredness never went away.

i am just thrown because it is SO much worse, unrelenting really.

I also don't want to tell friends yet-I can't tell friends before family...

I am going to bed as soon as the kids go to bed. Still shattered! Can't nap with dd-ds is still awake!

sorry not trying to pour on the cold water. I am whinging, really. It could be much much worse, I know.

[lulumama]

lie down as much as you can, eat little and often, and know that this soon will pass.....and can you not relieve the pressure by telling family...will it really be so bad? the stress of not telling might be making you feel worse...

[3sEnough]

Eat constantly and drink ice cold tonic water with lemon slices (worked for me and you can pretend it's a proper G&T too!) Mine was the owrst by far with no3 too - it eased off really early though (11 weeks ish) so there's hope.

[fillyjonk]

oh i dunno. i think atm its better to keep it to myself

i haven't really sorted it out in my head ANYWAY, and they will be wanting to know why this has happened AGAIN (beats me) and how we will COPE and etc etc.

oh it'll be ok

[3sEnough]

It'll be great - I adore having 3 but it's tight on money and it's exhausting etc, etc but seriously - it's lovely!!

[Tinkjon]

fillyjonk, are your children old enough to play on the computer (if you have one)? The CBeebies website is brilliant for amusing little ones. Other than that, the only thing that my daughter will do by herself is play with her sand/water table in the garden - that is the best £30 we ever spent! So I sit down in the garden whilst she potters about and I can get a real rest that way. So I'd really recommend getting one of those if you don't have one already.

[lljkk]

Cbeebies is your FRIEND. Pretend to be enlightened parent and lie down on sofa and "discuss" what they c on Cbeebies with them.

Play silly throwing games; you lie flat on your back and throw a soft ball to far side of game, toddler fetches it back. Bounce the ball on toddler's nose before throwing ball far away, again. Might only get you 5 minutes of lieing still, but 5 minutes can be bliss.

Treat you and them to indoor play centres. If they run a bit amok and other parents glare at you, fantasise about puking up on them.

Go to M+Todler groups where you can whimper to other mums and also let them run amok.

Go sit in the park. If pushing on swings is too much work for you, let them sit in the driveway and put stones in pots -- or arrange stones in patterns for the older one.

Get a cleaner, if you can afford one.

Beans on toast varied with cheese on toast is a perfectly acceptable tea for them, night after night. Especially if you throw in the ocasional bag of crisps and some chocolate buttons for pudding.

Will one of them be in school by time baby comes?

[lljkk]

oops, throw ball to far side of room, I meant.

[ledodgy]

Can't offer any advice but oodles of empathy. I have a 4 year old and a 19 month old and am having terrible sickness/dizziness this time round I just want to lie down and sleep all day but I can't. I comfort myself in hoping that the blooming stage will come soon

[Oblomov]

Turn the TV on. All day. I believe in limiting tv, but when are ill...anything goes.
Let the children do puzzles. Try to remain on the sofa with a duvet for as much as poosible.
I mean it.
I am a diabetic and have had to look after ds after a hypo. I KNOW.

[fillyjonk]

nope, might up ds's nursery days (can't atm, they are full, but 6 months from now...possibly)

like the playing "fetch" with the toddlers. I think they would look at me oddly, but its worth a try...

[perpetuaphoenixfire]

balloons also good, kids love them and you dont have to move. set up something that will make a noise if they escape from the room so you can close your eyes and if you doze you know they cant get away. put dvd on and teach oldest child which is play button. my kids survived on fish fingers, pizza and things on toast when i was pg with ds4. cereal also acceptable tea. coco pops for pudding

[DumbledoresGirl]

Sympathies FJ. Anyone with 2 or more quite close together has been where you are and knows what it is like.

I agree with others in that life comes down to the bare basics. When I was pg with no 3 my other two were both 3 and under, when pg with no 4, they were all aged between 6 and 2. It is tough, but it is not forever.

Have the tv on, lie on the sofa and try to rest when they are playing, go to sleep when they are asleep or out of the house.

TB totally H with you, when I was pg, I got such overwhelming fatique, pretty much all the time, I would lie down and sleep during the day, even going to bed and leaving 2 yo downstairs playing or watching videos. I kow many would hold up their hands with horror at that, but, all I can say is, my children are good, I know they won't run out into the street, and I just had to sleep. I could not get through a day without a nap.

M/S is not something I suffered from though. How you cook a meal when you feel sick is beyond me. But I am sure plenty of sufferers can give you their tips. I would imagine bulk cooking and freezing or buying easy things like fishfingers or, dare I say it, nuggets, would help.

[fillyjonk]

ah thanks all, you are normalising freezer food for me

it does not help that i am in throes of guilt about this one STILL so naturally have to express it through the baking of bread and playing of games. I KNOW i am an eegit.

[fruitful]

Mine will play very happily together in the bath for a good 45 minutes. Which means I can sit on the toilet lid and slowly drink my pre-prepared cup of tea and eat 6 ginger biscuits (special mummy-medicine to stop her feeling sick, they just look like biscuits honest). And they both think a bath in the middle of the day is great fun.

[wrinklytum]

Washing up bowl full of water with bubbles and food colouring in and various plastic/beakers/funnels/bath toys did keep mine occupied for a while in the garden the other day.Got loads of ironing done!!!Would recommend you laid on sun lounger with ginger tea and dark glasses mumbling appropriate phrases at the dcs chatter

Getting ds to go and collect various leaves from herbs in the garden then smelling them also kept him occupied,"Oooh,that one smells nice,Mummy"especially as he then went on to count the leaves,give them to dd who proceeded to eat themDid quite decimate my herb collection,though.

Ditto watering the plants.....provide very small cups/small watering can and large bucket of water and telling oldest to go and water the plants after dunking can in the bucket.

Sandpits are good,but you do end up getting sand everywhere.Found loads in dds nappy.Lord knows how it got there!!!!

Dont stress re food...make it as easy as poss on yourself.When pg with no 2 ds ate a lot of scrambled egg/eggy bread/cheesy mash/filled pasta/sandwiches/filled jacket spuds.For main meals bulk cook and freeze.

Would also second c-beebies.If you are exhausted then a few days worth of tv is not going to unduly harm them,I am sure.

Good luck with no 3! I struggle with 2 so take hat off to you!

[MorocconOil]

The sickness can be eased by a change of scenery, so try to get out as much as you can.
Going to the park and getting lots of fresh air is good. Try sucking fruit flavoured boiled sweets for the sickness.

I had friends who were happy for me to visit with the DC, and were ok about me lying on their sofas while the Dc played around us.

Go to bed as soon as your DH walks through the door(as long as it's before DC go to bed).

Just do the bare minimum to get through the day, and try to remember it won't last forever.

[FrannyandZooey]

Oh filly

transport them all over here for a week, and you can lie on my excellent sofa whinging gently, while I lead them in eurythmy and bark sucking

I can feed you algae and chocolate, it will be fab

[FrannyandZooey]

[FrannyandZooey]

[fillyjonk]

franny that sounds fabulous, let me just find my holopad thingy...



Its it just so bloody unrelenting.

[beansprout]

Sorry to hear it's so difficult atm Fillyjonk. I agree with everyone else - consider yourself to be on emergency measures and just do whatever you need to (or not) to get through these early, difficult weeks.