hello all, just had a chance to find you and catch up

dinky sorry about the planning problems and lurgies, hope the DC are well enough to go and see Santa this morning

KBN sorry about your ex and hope all goes well, can't be easy as you can't always switch off your emotions

STW what a pain ref childminder. Can't believe your old nursery was £2,300 pcm! That is crazy, not worth going back to work. Hope you manage to find a suitable arrangment

THOM thanks for advice about thrush. H is on medicine for 10 days (so another 3) but I'd never considered I could get it (on my nipples?) should I have cream then? They don't look different, just the normal battered and bruised boobs with some scratches as the litte rat needs his nails cut

PSL glad you've reached a truce with MIL. I've made it clear to DH I'm not going to see his mum again. I went out of my way in the summer to take DD and DS to see her and FIL (about 1 hours drive away) and they kept making excuses. The one time we did go at the beginning of Sept with DH just before we returned to KSA his mother refused to move about 2 foot to have her photo taken with the kids. That was the last straw for me the old witch.
They didn't even send a card (let alone a present) when H was born and 'forgot' DDs birthday in October. Cow

Hope everyone else ok x

kbn big hugs xxx just a quick check in my nights are consisting of breast feeding at the mo, i love bf but at this time of night i am exhausted love to all xxx

Hello all!

My apologies for recent abcence. Things have been pretty tough really, some of you may remember that both the HV and GP wanted me to go on anti-depressents. So far, I am working through the fog without them, but I am starting to see the appeal. M is a dream (on the whole). Two teeth, lots of hair and lots of personality! We bought her first pair of shoes last night as she is standing and has -- walked-- fallen forwards into my arms. She’s really not far off walking, which is both enormously exciting and hugely terrifying! She will certainly be on the go by Christmas!

I am working part-time, but only temping, so still desperately looking for that elusive part-time perm job that’s close and pays well! Talk about mission:impossible! I think once that issue is resolved I will feel better – money worries and feelings on inadequacy both playing starring roles in my emotional dram at the moment. We have sorted childcare now though (I managed to bury the hatchet with MIL rather than in her!) and we now only have one day a week paid for childcare, with a lovely CM just across the road from us. I take her across in my PJs and then go home and get ready for work!

I do try and lurk, but have been lured into fluffier forums! Now my working hours are more regular, I hope to be able to check in more regularly and stay in contact more. Are there any plans for a Christmas meet-up?

Take care all. xxx

No, no news to tell KBN. Our plan - which hasnt been put off by Danny and his distaste for sleep - is to have 3 kids - not planning on having number 3 until house is sorted though as quite like having a bit of a gap between all the sleep deprivation that goes with small babies....

We're a superkingsize couple too - though that doesnt stop the duvet discussions as we're both duvet hogs...

dinky anything you'd like to tell us? THREE kids? hope all the lurgies clear soon and you get to see Santa.

STW second and thirded, you ask for what you're comfortable with. it's good to draw up a list of what your priorities are with childcare, with some people it might be something else that you're less worried about so do your list and feel entirely confident in sticking to it and not feeling like you're being fussy. for me, where and when they sleep is very high up the list.

lbb it sounds like your dp is a very brave man! with both dp and i not being the most slight of people we decided very early on in our relationship to invest in a super kingsize bed. best decision we ever made i think. even if we only have a few milimetres left either side of the bed!

thank you all for your kind words.

Aah, DH and I often have those issues when we switch sides LBB. Though I'd be livid if I got pushed out of bed at 4 in the morning for it...

STW - I dont think you are being too fussy. As LBB said, you need to find someone you are comfortable with the kids being with for so much of the day - and as Sam is still really little, and O is only just 2, it is important that they have somewhere where they can have a good nap. Have you been in touch with your local surestart centre - they may be able to recommend local childminders to you (know they helped out a couple of women I knew with finding childminders when their childcare arrangements fell through at the last minute)? Have you thought about maybe looking into nannyshares (maybe with someone with a baby and older kid at school or 2 older kids at school) - I know a couple of people who are doing nanny shares and its working well for them - and alot cheaper than putting 2 kids into nursery? Given you live in prime commuterbelt territory am sure there should be some nannyshares around if you did want to look into it. Hope your childcare woes get sorted out soon.

Have had a horrid week of illness in the dinky house - DS1 came down with bug on Sunday and was off sick from school till yesterday - which is precisely when Danny got it (whose sleeping had already been crap all week due to teething and is now practically non-existent). So am now on day 5 of very little sleep indeed and having to deal with poorly crying child/ren when I get home. And our nanny is ill with the same bug too... aargh. Fortunately am not too busy at work this week so can just about cope. Am just hoping that everyone is better for next week and neither DH nor I get it. We're meant to be taking the boys to go see Santa at Selfridges tomorrow (yes I know its insanely early but was the only slot left by the time I got my slatternly arse round to thinking about a Santa visit) so think will see how the boys are tomorrow morning before deciding if we go or not as dont want to be responsible for giving Santa the lurgy...

STW - re the planners - yup, am pretty angry that we went to all the time and expense of getting plans drawn up and approved without them warning us we had to start the work immediately or it would be revoked (normally you have a couple of years to start the work). So is back to the drawing board where instead of a side return we could have 3 metres stuck onto our kitchen to effectively create a utility zone (hmm, useful - not) or stick a redundant 4metre courtyard into a kitchen extension with a delightful view of a wall DH and I are mulling over what would be best to do to add value to the property and also give us space enough to be able to deal with 3 kids (and all their washing and tat) in the house.

Dp pushed me out of bed at 4am because I've been sleeping on his side and really fidgeting and duvet stealing for the past 3 nights.....
STW FWIW, you're not being fussy, you have to find a person, plan, situation etc that you are happy with. It might be different from what someone else would look for, but if that's what's important to you and your children, then it's not being fussy at all.

KTB - so sorry to read about your news - not surprised you have been in such shock. Wishing you lots of strength to get through the funeral.

LBB - what were you doing posting at 4.54am this morning?!?!? Mind you, I was awake then, just willing Sam to go back to sleep. He's waking early at the moment - very happy and excited about starting the day. Much more excited than me!!!

Dinky - just seen your appearance on the Boots website! What a lovely photo!

Got an appointment to see a nursery on Tuesday - this one's only £1400 a month!!! The few CM's I've contacted so far are full, or only have place for one child. By the way, I'm dis-counting all CM's that have dogs, or don't have a dedicated "sleeping" room - am I being too fussy?

Hope everyone's ok? Been wondering how soem of the ladies that used to post are - Bumps, Herbgarden, PSL etc.

KBN So sorry to read your news there. Must be terribly upsetting. Of course just because things don't always work out doesn't mean we don't continue to have strong feelings. I imagine that's normal.

STW - that is a nightmare about your childminder. I really hope you find something suitable - and affordable - soon. Is this the same childminder that is pregnant?

KBN - I'm really sorry to hear the sad news about your ex. I cant even begin to imagine what you're going through and feeling right now. I hope that you manage to make it through the week and funeral next week. Sending you lots of hugs and strength.