"God is actually a flying dutchman you know" The most bizarre nonsense you children have spouted

(107 Posts)
schneebly Tue 05-May-09 13:40:23

hmmgrinhmmthat one came from DS2 (4y4m) today on the way to nursery. Am I to blame the television? Perhaps that spongebob fellow?

fruitbeard Fri 08-May-09 16:43:58

Last week DD really freaked me out by sitting up in bed and saying 'Dark Forces are coming, mummy' - anyone got any idea what that's about??

She's also rather taken with the Flying Dutchman from Spongebob...

And is is convinced that we all start off as girls and she's going to turn into a boy eventually 'like Daddy did when he was a little girl' (pmsl). Apparently I 'went wrong' which is why I'm still a girl...

Last year she was a flower girl at BIL's wedding. She was great up until the last minute before the bride entered the church, then had a screaming crying fit. I was sent for as her cousins couldn't calm her down, she clung to me saying 'mummy, mummy, I don't want to go to the island, don't make me go to the island'...

Didn't have a clue what she was talking about then as I carried her up the aisle back to our seats it suddenly struck me what she meant...

Oh, and she wants to get married but not to a boy. So far 5 of her girl friends have been in the picture (I fear she's a bit fickle)...

crazycanuck Fri 08-May-09 17:54:52

ds (4yrs) calls earwax 'ear boogies' grin

crazy, grin!
I hear your "ear boogies" and raise you DS1's "fire snotters"=nose bleed.

These are FAB!

re Jim'll Fix it - I wrote to him when I was four years old and desperate for a little baby brother or sister - the letter read: "Dear Jim, please can you fix it for my mummmy to have a baby..." Needless to say she didn't send it lol!

When DS was little, we were teaching him the word yoghurt - he kept getting muddled up saying "It's not YOUR-ghurt, it's MY-ghurt" and never quite got the YOG bit. To this day (he's 15 now) he still pronounces it YOUR instead of YOG but he now understands the concept of yours and mine etc lol smile

madamelapin Sat 09-May-09 13:59:54

My DS (3) is suddenly pronouncing his words that much more clearly and, just this morning, we have

Look at the morph climbing up the wall (he loves Morph the plasticine 80s character) meaning moth

I'm not feeling not well Mummy - it is a tummy egg, can I get it out like a hen?

And my favourite - Mummy, I love you, will you marry me and turn into a princess?

he also believes in the following evolution: boy, girl, daddy, and then, tantara, a mummy. He's going to be a mummy when he grows up (after being a squirrel).

fruitbeard Sat 09-May-09 19:24:08

LL, is that you?

thirtypence Thu 14-May-09 03:41:26

Ds used to call the stalk of an apple a "grew" because in a book about an apple tree with apples on stalks it say "they grew and grew".

He also said "this duvet is not duving me very well mum."

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