Really worried about my Dh. He's not coping at work. How do i get him help?

[trixymalixmasy]

Dh is getting really stressed out at work.

He just seems to have totally lost his confidence after a bad project and everything seems to be spiralling out of control for him.

He is normally very good at his job always gets the top rating and is on the fast track scheme.

This one bad project just seems to have knoocked him for six and he is convinced he is really crap at his job.

He keeps just bursting into tears and can't sleep. When he went to see the GP he just prescribed sleeping tablets which didn't help as DH just felt woozy at work.

I think he maybe needs some counselling or something. has anyone got any suggestions?

[karen999]

Can he speak to his work? Some employers offer counselling etc? Or they can facilitate meetings with his superiors to get his confidence back?

[TheQueenSPeach]

Trixy that's awful. My DH was in a similar way last year and I know it's not easy (he's fine now, if that's any comfort)
Sounds like your DH needs to talk to his employers first - they obviously have a lot of confidence in him. My DH didn't get on with sleeping tablets but the Anti depressants were a bit more successful, just to take the edge off the anxiety. Did the GP discuss that at all? Our GP also referred him for counselling, though that took a while to get an NHS appointment through. If your DH's employer can access something, or perhaps his union can, if he's in one, then that might be better. Otherwise perhaps try to get a CBT Counsellor privately?

[trixymalixmasy]

His work do have a counselling service but it seems like you need to have actually had a mental breakdown before it is offered.

He doesn't really want to speak to his boss about it as he feels like they will totally lose confidence in him at work.

What's a CBT counsellor and how much do they cost?

[TheQueenSPeach]

CBT is Cognitive Behavioural therapy and I think is what is most widely recognised as the best kind of counselling. I think you can find someone here Not cheap though, £30+ for an hour long session, and you're probably looking at 1 session a week. You also need to find one that you click with, ie, it can be quite personal.

Interesting you mention "mental breakdown". Is there such a thing? DH kept asking if he was having a nervous breakdown when he was crying and throwing up, and I don't know if there is such a point where the doctor says "Oh yes, this is a breakdown". I literally don't know. Would DH's work class stress as good enough reason to provide a counsellor?

[anchovies]

I think you may reach a point where your poor dh will have to speak to either HR or H&S (depending on company set up) as the stress of his job is clearly having an impact. Definitely agree with trying CBT but long term I think he will have to deal with the cause of the stress (fast track scheme rings alarm bells for me?) Some more info here

[trixymalixmasy]

QueensPeach (like the Xmas name by the way),

DH's work only seem to offer the counselling if you have had to take time off work through stress.

Do you have any idea if private healthcare would cover you for CBT?

[anchovies]

I have had CBT on Bupa

[trixymalixmasy]

DH has Standard Life healthcare at work.

I take it your GP has to refer you?