Do I have PTSD? Or is it just depression?

[HazelnutCoffeeandMincePies]

I was sexually abused as a child.
Yuck yuck yuck. I don't think I've ever written that down before and I've gotten used to saying it aloud when necessary.

Anyway, I've been diagnosed as depressed since my first suicide attempt that landed me in hospital, 7 years ago.
I had some rubbish counselling a couple of years previous to that because I have awful dreams but that didn't resolve anything ended for reasons I can't remember.
I have been on and off anti-depressants because of my failure to keep doctor's appointments and actually take the medication and probably have never taken them for the 6 weeks they say it takes for them to take effect, despite being on a fairly high dose.
A few years ago, I was again offered some counselling, which I went to but ended up walking out of the first session as I thought she was very rude to me and made me sit in silence because she said I liked control 'too much' probably true
Since then, I have had no 'treatment' other than the medications and I clam up too much at doctor's appointments to talk to them about the childhood things so think they think I'm depressed just because, rather than brought on by an incident.

Sorry about the ramble, but it brings me to my question... could this be PTSD? It's only just occurred to me and have, annoyingly, just come out of a doctor's appointment.

Thank you if you read this far.

[lollylou2876]

Its quite possible, I have had ptsd due to abuse, depression is a symptom of ptsd , alongside flashbacks. Please ask your go to refer you to a psychologist to get a specific diagnosis as I have been fobbed off here and there by a male gp who advised I watch snooker, he took it far more seriously when my abuser got 20 years and I slapped the front page headline in front of him and said now are you going to help me?

I think gp thought i was after a sicknote for work instead of really needing help.

I was then told the longer PTSD is left untreated the harder it is to overcome, ask to be referred for trauma psychotherapy alongside CBT and emdr.

[AnxiousCarer]

Hi,

I agree with lou PTSD is possible with the depression and dreams. I am currently being treated for PTSD. Mine presents as anxiety, pannick attacks and urges to self harm. I also appear to have dissociated from the emotions linked to the trauma. I can recount the cold hard facts all day long with little emotional impact, but will have pannic attacks when I least expect them.

My GP initially started me on prozac/Flouxitine which didn't seem to make any difference. After 8 weeks it was changed to Mirtazapine and the jurrys still out, but had some better days since starting on it. I am seeing a councellor with experience of working with trauma through work, but she is struggling and has refered me to a psychologist also through work for more specialist treatment.

If you look online there are some questionaires you can do to screen for PTSD. You could do one, print it out and take it with you to the GP. Ask for a psychology referal to someone with experience of complex PTSD which I believe is more likely if childhood abuse has taken place over a period of time rather than one traumatic event.

[HazelnutCoffeeandMincePies]

Thank you so much Anxious and lolly makes me think I'm not being over dramatic about things. I normally just muddle on until I really have to deal with things.

[hopscotchegg]

Of course you want control as an abuse survivor. I am so sorry you had a shit counsellor, that was not okay of them. You may well have PTSD. There are some charities like NAPAC that may be able to help with counselling?

I am sorry you were abused. I was too. I'm glad you managed to post this

[Nospringflower]

It is highly likely you have PTSD / trauma. If you can speak to your GP they should be able to refer you for specific psychological therapy to treat this. Hope things improve for you.

[gqip]

Could be complex PTSD. Speak to your GP and ask for a new referral. Hope you get the right help.