My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have medical concerns, please seek medical attention.

Mental health

simple things to improve your life

14 replies

minatiae · 29/07/2016 21:21

I have anxiety. on meds, got a therapist etc.

something that always makes me happy when I stay at other peoples houses and visit family is that everything is always tidy and organised. I love things being where they should be, uncluttered rooms, well kept houses. but I haven't been keeping my own home like that. I'm not 'dirty' messy, but I'm not organised, things go where I happen to put them and all my cupboards are a mix of different things. unsurprisingly I lose things all the damn time.

this week I decided to make a change. I've taken everything out and put things where they belong. my kitchen looks like a kitchen again with a cupboard for pots and pans, a cupboard for plates and bowls, a cupboard for cup and glasses etc. my closet is organised. clutter has been removed and things I don't need thrown away or donated.

I just realised one morning that all the things I love about other people's houses can be the same things I love about mine if I keep things in the way that pleases me like they do.

it's made a big difference already, my house is now calming and not stressful to be in.

What small changes have you made that have made your life better?

OP posts:
Report
picklypopcorn · 29/07/2016 21:39

Are you me??

I posted this exact thing on the housekeeping board last week Grin

I have GAD and like you im on meds and doing the online CBT course.

On the CBT thing one of the modules is recognising the difference between things you can control, things you can influence and things you cannot change. You list down all the things that cause you stress and say which ones you can control, influence and can't change. One of the big ones I could change was the state of my house. Mine was DIRTY messy.. Not quite channel 5 documentary standard but a bit closer than it should have been Blush

Once you've identified your 'changeable stressers' you then write a plan on how to improve them. So I asked on Mumsnet for advice and the lovely people on here gave me some wonderful, wonderful advice on how to get started on the cleaning and how to get on with it :)

I did it :)

4 weeks later my house is still spotless and now I'm gradually working my way through little organisation projects in problem areas of the house: eg my makeup drawer, food cupboards etc.

I have a cleaning routine pinned up on a board on my fridge that lays out 20 mins of cleaning tasks to do each night. It's brilliant because it takes the guess work out of it, you know exactly what to do when and you never spend more than 20 mins a night doing the cleaning Grin

The best bit is I can now actually RELAX at home! When there was dirt and stuff everywhere it was so grim I didn't enjoy my time at home, but now I love it :) I'm so so so so SO much better with my anxiety too! Grin

Huge congrats on sorting out your house, it's a huge achievement!!

Report
minatiae · 29/07/2016 22:17

so glad it helped you too!

some other things I've done:

  • doing dishes every night before bed
  • making time to have a cup of tea in the morning
  • giving up alcohol


I love alcohol but it makes me feel depressed and anxious the next day. I always feel like I've done something wrong even if all I've been doing is drinking at home and not even talking to anyone. I decided it wasn't worth it any more.
OP posts:
Report
picklypopcorn · 29/07/2016 22:36

Good decision :)

I've never been a big drinker but I can relate to the cup of tea thing! I don't even think it's the drink itself, I think it's the 10 minutes of quiet time it takes to drink it which really helps you just decompress :)

Report
allegretto · 29/07/2016 22:37

Mine is similar. I get the kids' bags and my work bag sorted out the night before - yes, I know it's really obvious but I used to muddle through with chaotic mornings for YEARS before I realised this helped! I sleep a lot better doing it this way too.

Report
Wolfiefan · 29/07/2016 22:40

Music. Lifts my spirits every time.
Getting out the house. Sitting in lowers my mood.
Exercise. Biggest boost ever.
Having a weekly planner with details of meals to be cooked and jobs to do and activities and appointments to go to. Very sad but helps my anxiety!

Report
Snog · 03/08/2016 07:18

I stopped drinking alcohol and also stopped drinking caffeine which made a noticeable difference for me.

Report
sklooshy · 10/08/2016 13:02

What is the online CBT course prickly? I desperately need to get my house in order. It's defiantly making my anxiety much worse. It's so cluttered I get stressed at home but i m too anxious to leave often. Vicious circle

Report
Snog · 10/08/2016 18:36

Sklooshy can you just walk around the block?

Report
sklooshy · 10/08/2016 22:35

Yes, I definitely could. I do try to get out most days, school hols are hard work and it's tempting to stay lazy and stay in with the kids especially since it has pretty much poured rain since the schools finished. I have taken them you swimming, soft play, meeting friends but I would say that's only 40% of the time. I feel like I get, somewhere then lapse again 2 weeks later and start the cycle again. I'm on mess to control anxiety and cut down on alcohol. I am a single parent, youngest DC father was very EA and I'm still recovering from that

Report
Snog · 11/08/2016 07:46

I find walking round the block is beneficial even though it doesn't sound much but it seems achievable for me even on a bad day.

If clutter is getting to you could you involve dc in helping you to make progress?

I think tiny goals are best when you are struggling, eg sort one drawer or shelf or find 3 items you don't need and get rid of them, or do five or ten mins housework using a timer.

I find doing this stuff early in my day is easier and helps me to feel a sense of achievement during the rest of the day.

Report
forcryinoutloud · 12/08/2016 19:07

Yes these all sound like great things to do and well done to you OP. Unfortunately I have a DH and two teens who are quite messy and it can get me really down at times if I think I am the only one tidying Sad

The tea thing (or coffee) for me it's both the drink and the quiet time just sitting thinking or looking out of the window.

Not sure if I could give up my alcohol totally I am not a heavy drinker and don't get drunk, just like a few pleasant drinks to wind down a bit some evenings.

Report
Finola1step · 12/08/2016 19:31

Following on from having school bags ready the night before...I have a box for dd with all her hair stuff in it. So we never have to hunt around for favoured hairbrush or a hairband. They live in the box which lives on the shelf near the door.

A very small thing but by goodness, it makes school mornings so much easier.

Report
dangermouseisace · 12/08/2016 21:55

I've found Pokemon go a godsend. I can actually get the kids to go out of the house and we can just go for a walk over fields etc in the sunshine no arguing. It doesn't have to be in crowded places. So I get exercise, they get entertainment and exercise without knowing.

Report
mostimproved · 12/08/2016 22:22

Agree with Wolfiefan about music, and with Snog about using the timer. Had to use both of these today to get myself to put away laundry and do hoovering - the music made me feel a bit more energetic and the timer makes you realise how little time these chores really take, and you know you get a break once the timer goes off. Wish I had more suggestions, I will update if any come to mind.

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.