Really struggling with PTSD - should I tell work?

[user1468841624]

Hi,

I started a new job last Autumn and then had something of a mental health breakdown before starting, pulled myself together enough to start the job and am doing well there.

Have been in therapy since February for depression, but that has uncovered some repressed PTSD from teen years.

I have been having good days and bad days but am at present stuck in a rut of terrible days. I know I am processing some of what happened, which is a step forward. But this is taking a huge emotional toll on me and I am physically very affected.

I am managing ok at work except for really struggling with short term memory and keep messing up on small details then catastrophising over them.

I am at the stage now where I have accepted that my condition isn't going to go away over night and do not know whether to come clean with work about what is going on.

On the one hand, I don't expect them to make any special exceptions for me so feel there is no need to tell them. On the other hand, I feel very lost and alone and constantly on edge and as though I am messing everything up. My boss is very understanding and I know he could reassure me that I am doing just fine.

Basically, I'm just a mess. Half of the problem with the PTSD is that it was repressed for 20 years and now I don't know how much I should be bringing it out into the light. I have been holding things together for many years now and I am so tired.