Chronic anxiety and pregnancy

[mummytobe123]

I'm not really sure if I'm posting in the right place but here goes. I've suffered from anxiety all my life though in the past few years it's become quite severe. I've had periods where I've been on medication which has helped and periods but over the past couple of years with some CBT and various other things I've been able to manage my anxiety without medication.

I found out I was pregnant just over a week ago. The pregnancy was planned and this is all I have ever wanted. I should stress there is nothing 'wrong' in my life, other than the normal little things everyone has to worry about.

My concern is that following 24 hours of excitment and joy, my anxiety seems to have kicked in again with a vengeance. I don't feel at all like I thought I would and instead am worrying obsessively about a range of things. I also feel a bit 'dark' and very negative and am just concerned that this is going to continue and spiral.

I just can't seem to feel excited (which I did all the time when we were TTC at the very though of being pregnant/a mum) and instead just feel a sense of impending doom!

I realise that it is only very early days but just wondered whether anyone has had/is having a similar experience.

[SoloIsAHotCougar]

It took 12 years of on/off trying before falling pg and I miscarried ~ a MMC that went undetected for a month. That was in January 95.
I then fell pg again in November 97 and was an anxious and depressed wreck for the entire pregnancy on top of which I was ceremoniously dumped before finding out I was pg, so had to deal with it on my own. I did have lots of counselling, took AD's and somehow got through it giving birth to my Ds in August 98, so he's coming up 13...My MW team were fabulously supportive and gave me as much time and support as I needed to recover after his birth before going home.
For what it's worth, I became a much stronger person after I had Ds and have had much less depression and no anxiety to speak of.

The only advice I can give you is to see your GP, try to get some counselling and try to gain some control over your feelings ~ hard I know, but with support, you can do it.
Good luck with everything, congratualtions :) and be kind to yourself; pregnancy is the beginning of some life changes that will bring you joy and laughter, worry and tears, but it is wonderful.

[mummytobe123]

Thank you Solo Sounds like you are an incredibly brave person and I'h hoping that this will make me stronger too.

[SoloIsAHotCougar]

:) No, not brave! you just have to get on with it. It's hard but you do get through it and it is better with support :) I'm sure you will be just fine.

Being pg is a different page to the trying to become pg and it brings all kinds of different worries. 'Will I be Ok/get morning sickness/embarrass myself throwing up? can I afford to have this baby? How will I cope...etc...
For myself with my Ds and Dd it was 'will I miscarry again (I've had 2 plus a very early one), will they be 'Ok' will I be able to afford to bring them up, will Dp(2) abandon me...' There are many worries, but over worrying wont let you enjoy your pregnancy (I know this fiirst hand) and trust me when I say that you cannot get back that beautiful part of life that is being pregnant. My worries/anxieties have meant that I will never know what a happy pg is. Please don't let yourself feel this way years from now :)

[Zwitterion]

Yes. I have been living with OCD and related anxiety and depression for ever, coping well most of the time but with two periods in hospital.

I had been doing really well without meds for about 2 years, got pregnant and bam!

Lots of women get more anxious when pregnant, probably some clever biological reason for it, but it still sucks.

I went to my GP who referred me to a fab consultant psychiatrist - they were totally brilliant. I started taking meds again 12 weeks in which helped massively.

Good luck. You're not alone. There is immense pressure to be amazing and glowing and serene through pregnancy which doesn't help either!

[cakesloveme]

Hi Mummy,

I could have written your post nearly 2 years ago now. Have also suffered with anxiety for a very long time, and just when I was in a 'good' place, off meds, trying and successfully conceiving a baby, the anxiety hit big time again.

It was the fear of the unknown, the horrific sickness, fear of a poorly baby, fear of being out of control. I resisted going back on meds until 27 weeks when it just got too much to handle.

My advice would be 1) breathe! 2) Talk to someone you trust about how you feel 3) write down what is making you anxious if you can pinpoint it 4) don't dwell on the things that are out of your control (yes, I know, easier said than done!) 5) take up something like yoga (this really helped me) and 6) have a contingency plan of support - I was seen by a very helpful psychologist which also helped a lot.

Being a mummy is the best thing I have ever done, and despite the terrible time I had ion pregnancy, I'm now at the point of really wanting another baby. My beautiful son is now 14 months and I am almost weaned off meds :)

Good luck, you will get through this!

[philnteds]

Mummytobe123 hello i have suffered with anxiety since i was a teenager and i was off meds and fell pregnant....in the first few weeks of pregnancy i didn't feel right, I felt quite down at times, lost and anxious and I lots of morning sickness but by the middle part of the pregancy I felt fine and had no anxiety until i was due to be induced
my long-winded point is that it may not be classic anxiety at this point...i think it would be normal to feel anxious when you first fall pregnant i remember having very dark thoughts at first but it all settled down although i never felt excited about having a baby I was unsure as to what to expect!!...i was very happy when he was safely delivered however . I would go and see your GP or midwife and have a chat about your fears and worries. Some anxiety at this stage in your life is to be expected. Sorry if this sounds patronising of course your GP will know whether or not you actually need AD's and or counselling.

[philnteds]

at the middle part of my pregnancy i felt i could take on the world and became VERY confident at work i assume that was the hormones kicking in!!!!

[Yukana]

I suffer from an anxiety disorder and this is my first pregnancy. All the way through I've had problems worrying and worrying, and then worrying because I'm worrying! The first 10 weeks of pregnancy were okay for me, and the scans greatly helped my anxiety. My 12 week scan was wonderful and then it was just constant worrying up until my 20 week scan, questions like 'What if there is no heartbeat?' 'What if the baby isn't okay?' going round my head. 20 week scan was fine, and then it was just worrying that I'd go into premature labour and lose my baby, which went away after 28 weeks. Since then I've only been worried about dying in childbirth (thanks to a comment made by my midwife, which was incredibly tactless of her) and stillbirth (Around 20 weeks I watched a pregnancy program that involved stillbirth, and was never the same again afterwards, even now it brings me to tears). So, it seems I've constantly found something to worry about. I've also been chronically worried about pregnancy symptoms that my midwives have assured me are normal.

As a word of advice, avoid pregnancy and birth programs, avoid miscarriage and stillbirth topics, and ask your midwife anything, even if it seems silly. I've bombarded my midwife with questions at times, often of scenarios I've made up and worried about in my head, and she's been fine with it. Remember you can share your worries with those around you, and don't be afraid to ask for support.

Lastly, if my first paragraph scares you, that wasn't my intention! Honestly, although I've worried myself silly, I've had an uncomplicated pregnancy, and things have genuinely been fine all the way through. It is possible for there to be light at the end of the tunnel!

[Piperlight]

Has anyone experienced anxiety-extreme and have the baby turn out fine? I've read so many studies that say cortisol can really hurt the baby! Help!

[Fuzzywuzzywasabear]

Hi piperlight

I noticed you'd posted on a few threads about this, have you been placed on medication?

I'm currently receiving CBT for anxiety during pregnancy.

Are you under the care of the mental health team through your midwife?

[Piperlight]

Not sure what cbt is. Just wondering if anyone can talk about how their baby turned out after experiencing anxiety. Thanks.

[Fuzzywuzzywasabear]

I'm 39 weeks and baby is healthy not arrived yet but I don't think your anxiety will affect the babies health.

Some of the anxiety medications cam cause side effects for the baby but you should discuss with your doctor if the benefits to you out weigh the effects on baby.

Cbt is therapy which teaches coping mechanisms to help you deal with your anxiety.

[Mumof2soontobe3katy]

Hi everyone just wondering@Piperlight how did things go eventually? Did things work out in the end for you and how was your baby? All amazing I hope?! Struggling at the minute with anxiety mostly that I have harmed my baby through all my anxiety and so now I’m in a viscous circle and would love to hear if things turned out well for you? Or if anyone else had some advice or positive stories would love to hear them xxxx