Depressed since birth of second child

[fiddlydee]

I am 33 and have suffered from depression since the birth of my second child. For three years I thought my husband and I were failing in our relationship. We always agrued and talked about divorce. I was also having night sweats and was eventually sent for hormone treatment. This didn't work and no link to early menopuase was found. They put me on SSRIs for severe PMT as I told them I became very down around my period. It was only then that I realised I was depressed. The cloud lifted and I feel so much better on the SSRIs. I realised that around my period was the very worst time but I was actually depressed all the time.(I still haven't worked out the reasons for the nightsweats). My youngest is four now so although it all started when she was born I really don't feel I can call this postnatal depression. I want to try to come off the SSRIs at some point but not knowing what has triggered this I don't see what has changed and how I can ever feel better without them. Has anyone else been through something similar?

[NanaNina]

Why do you want to come off the SSRIs if they are keeping your depression at bay. I had a severe episode of depression in 1995 and was hospitalised for 3 months but made a good recovery. I was on imipramine (150mg) one of the old tryclics. I stayed on 100 mg for 14 years because everytime I tried to come off them I got what I thought was a return of the depression but they were actually withdrawal symptoms. I tried this by myself twice and once with GP oversight. All the GPs told me it was a return of the depression and I must stay on them for life.

I then began seeing a psychotherapist (not to do with mental health) but it turned out she had a particular interest in mental health and she encouraged me to come off the imipramine very very slowly and I did so, and it took me 10 months, finished in July 09. I felt great to be off the drugs and then in December 09 I began to get symptoms of depression again and went back to her, but I was getting worse and worse and the counselling was not doing me any good. Over the Easter weekend this year, I nose dived and ended up back in psychiatric hospital for 3 months, and was put back on imipramine. The Conslt psychiatrist was convinced that my relapse was due to coming off the imipramine. I did wonder myself as I was only off for 5 months before relapsing, and there was no particular reason. My first episode was following the sudden death of a very very dear friend.

My recovery is turbulent and I am getting setbacks or "blips" though still many more good days than bad, and it has been the worst year of my life. SO I know this is subjective advice but I would advise anyone to think twice (and three times) before coming off drugs if they are keeping you mentally well.

Having said all that I know that a lot of people on MN come off the drugs gradually and are ok, so it is of course your call. For me I will stay on them for the rest of my life but as I'm in my late 60s that's not so bad as a young woman.

Wishing you well whatever you decide.