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work colleague has implied im not welcome back to work

45 replies

greeneyedlulu · 03/02/2014 11:49

i received a message on facebook from a work colleague who has basically implied that things are fine without me and it hasnt gone unnoticed by the management! i know she is being a spiteful cow but is there any action i can take against her and the company?

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TheDoctrineOfSnatch · 03/02/2014 11:54

What is your organisation's social networking policy?

Personally I am not friends on Facebook with any current colleagues.

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gamerchick · 03/02/2014 11:57

Print it out and show it to your manager. Let them deal with it.

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greeneyedlulu · 03/02/2014 12:04

trouble is is that my boss likes to bury his head in the sand

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VerucaInTheNutRoom · 03/02/2014 12:08

Print it out and send it to HR if your boss won't deal with it.

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atmywitsend13 · 03/02/2014 12:10

wow what a bitch! Did you reply? what is her title/role in the company?

I would be inclined to email her back and remind her she is not the manager and it is none of her business!

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flowery · 03/02/2014 12:26

She doesn't sound very nice, but why do you want to know what action you can take against the company?

If you feel bullied, and bring it to the attention of your manager/raise a grievance, and they fail to deal with it appropriately, then fair enough.

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Mollydoggerson · 03/02/2014 12:31

I wouldn't even respond. I think it is best to attach it to an e-mail addrerssed both to your manager and to HR and then defriend this person.

Some people just CANNOT mind their own business. Spiteful cow is right!

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Brussel · 03/02/2014 12:37

Unless she's your manager, ignore it and unfriend asap.
Some people just get pleasure from winding others up and getting a reaction so don't rise to it or give her any ammunition.

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PlasmaBall · 03/02/2014 12:41

I agree with flowery. Why would your first thought be what action can I take against the company?

Don't respond

Talk to your boss about it.

If his response is unsatisfactory then HR but you are a long way from a position where "action" is appropriate

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greeneyedlulu · 03/02/2014 12:52

i did reply saying that its not her place to imply im not welcome back and i said about the company as forward thinking as i know my boss probably wont do much! this person is not my boss technically im her supervisor!

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superhands · 03/02/2014 12:54

'We can discuss this at your next appraisal'

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eurochick · 03/02/2014 12:56

I agree with superhands' proposed response. And definitely print off a copy.

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PlasmaBall · 03/02/2014 12:58

What do you think your boss should "do"?

Any action depends entirely on the response from the company to your complaint. You have to make it first!

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greeneyedlulu · 03/02/2014 13:02

in the middle of writing an email to my manager who is currently on holiday so Im sure he is going to love to deal with this on his return and im sure my colleague will be straight in there speaking to him to give her side first and making out she is hard done by as she is a fan of the woe is me story

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flowery · 03/02/2014 13:08

I wouldn't do that.

If you supervise this person this is the type of thing you ought to be able to deal with on your own, and it's definitely not urgent enough to be emailing your manager on holiday about.

If she reports to you, then you currently have a problem about her attitude to you - what on earth has given her the impression that she can make that kind of comment to her supervisor? Obviously it's not acceptable to do it to anyone, but there is a boundaries/relationship issue in terms of her not respecting you if she's sending that kind of message to someone in a more senior position who is responsible for supervising her work.

Passing her behaviour on to your own manager to deal with probably won't increase her respect for you I wouldn't imagine. Most people would expect a serious telling off or even disciplinary action for making that kind of comment to their manager.

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PlasmaBall · 03/02/2014 13:19

I agree with all that flowery, except OP isn't working atm. Do we know why?

Therefore, matter should be dealt with by whoever is managing the FB poster while OP is off work, shouldn't it?

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greeneyedlulu · 03/02/2014 13:21

im emailing my boss but he wont see it till his return to work any way and seeing as im on maternity leave i dont really want to go in to the office to hand out disciplinary action just because she is being a spiteful cow but i do want to make it known that she is behaving this way towards me whilst im on offical leave and whilst my boss is away as she has a tendancy to cause a bit of trouble every now and then and this time she has really upset me so i want proper action to be taken against her!

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flowery · 03/02/2014 13:25

PlasmaBall I don't think we did know the OP wasn't working. I took it that she was just back, or just going back from being off for whatever reason.

However we now know she is on maternity leave, so yes whoever is managing the person should deal with it.

Doesn't make any difference to the separate and what I would describe as significant issue that this person feels she can speak that way to her supervisor, maternity leave or not. That ongoing issue still needs to be dealt with by the OP on her return.

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TheDoctrineOfSnatch · 03/02/2014 13:25

Is your boss her supervisor in your absence or is she reporting to someone else?

Are you friends on FB or did she just use the message function?

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PlasmaBall · 03/02/2014 13:28

So, what action would you take if you were working ATM OP? If she had done similar against another member of staff? I don't really understand what you want from your boss.

You're obviously upset and understandably so, but you don't sound very rational ATM. As boss is away there's no rush to send an email. Type it by all means if it helps, but please leave it a couple of days before sending it. IMO you'd be better off speaking to him on his return anyway.

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Viviennemary · 03/02/2014 13:32

I would immediately stop contact on Facebook with this person. I would be tempted to send a copy of the message to your boss for his attention and a copy to personnel for their attention. It's up to them what they do. But I wouldn't let it go.

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greeneyedlulu · 03/02/2014 13:39

the chain of command is my boss then me so in my absence she would report to another colleague or my boss, we are pretty flexiable as a team. however since she has started working for us she has caused problems amoungst the team by being selfish, very paranoid and has a tendancy to throw really big strops and not talk to people for some silly reason like the days of being in school!! my point now is that i am annoyed and i finally want some action taken against her as she cannot behave this way in a grown up civilised work environment and notice how she has done this when my boss is off! she is just being a pain but im fed up with how she can get away with this type of behaviour with no repremands whatsoever so I want something done!

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flowery · 03/02/2014 13:45

When do you go back to work OP?

I think this is the type of thing where there is a big risk if you email your boss you will sound whiny and it could be dismissed as being just two women not getting on.

I'm not suggesting her behaviour is appropriate in any way, just telling you how it might come across if you send a complainy email to your boss.

If you're due back very shortly, I would suggest speaking to your boss on your return, drawing this to his attention, telling him how you plan to deal with this woman and asking for his feedback before you do.

You say she's been like this for a while. What action have you taken previously to deal with her, as you are her supervisor?

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PlasmaBall · 03/02/2014 13:45

Yes, I understand that but you sound just as childish as her ATM.

You're in danger of looking exactly the way you've described her. i.e. "caused problems amoungst the team by being selfish, very paranoid and has a tendancy to throw really big strops and not talk to people for some silly reason like the days of being in school!!" From what you've posted here it would be very easy to twist things and apply that description to you.

It might not be the case and your feeling may well be justified but it will be very easy for you to come out of this badly unless you get your thoughts in order better. You can't just say something has to be done if you can't suggest what it should be. In your position I would expect you to be helping your boss deal with it, not just demanding that "something" must be done.

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greeneyedlulu · 03/02/2014 13:52

yes you guys are right, im all fired up as she has p**sed me off, my boss isnt back til thursday so I think i will call him then and then just have a chat with him as im not due back to work for another few months yet!

Thanks for the calming effect but im sure you understand how easy it can be to get riled up when on your own with your thoughts and a screaming 1 month old baby and i guess I just wanted to vent it out so that why i came on here!!

takes a deep breath

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