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Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Behaviour/development

Anyone having trouble with, or got any solutions for, daytime napping/nighttime settling of three month old babes (or thereabouts?) If so, I would LOVE to hear from you [fsmile]

47 replies

cruisemum1 · 08/12/2006 14:11

I have ds 13 weeks who has no trouble falling asleep in his car seat/on the go. But with the end of the Christmas term drawing near and therefore no real reason to go out early morning/early afternoon I don't know what I am going to do to settle him. He has never napped in his cot but I dream of the day when I can put him down for his nap and get on with stuff indoors instead of having to go out just so that he can sleep! Also, his naps are fairly short (30mins usually) other than his morning nap of 1 - 1.5hrs taken in car seat during school run. I know I am gonna have to bite the bullet and cross this bridge but I have put it off so far because a)he was so little that as long as he napped I didn't mind where and b) I am a coward and don't want the whole day to be spent with a fractious baby who has not slept . Also, should he be napping at regular times by now or is it still to early to expect that? Your advice will be most gratefully received
btw he is bf and still feeds every 2 to 2.5hrs too so advice on that score would also be welcomed

OP posts:

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SenoraPostrophe · 08/12/2006 14:16

what a coincidence!

ds is also 13 weeks and I have just (yesterday) started putting him down for naps. previously he slept for a long nap after the school run every morning, but this week is a school hol so he was fractious.

my method is to put him down when he seems sleepy (usually about 2 hours after he woke up, and after a mini breastfeed), and put the cot mobile on. with ds1 I just put him in a dark room actually but I have a mobile so i use it. then I repeat that. I'm also using a dummy to get him to go back to sleep if he has two short naps, which has meant that we're now almost on a well-known routine from a book (you know the one ) but that's a coincidence.

anyway this is day 2 and it's been much easier so far. the only thing I've got left to crack is the fact that if he fell asleep without the pram/car, then he only sleeps for 40 mins. hoping the dummy will work.

SenoraPostrophe · 08/12/2006 14:17

forgot to say - I did this a lot earlier with dd, later with ds1. I think 12/13 weeks is about right.

SenoraPostrophe · 08/12/2006 14:17

also re bf - if he happy, I wouldn't worry. or are you feeding every 2 hours at night too?

SmileysPeople · 08/12/2006 14:18

Or maybe not a coincidence.

cruisemum1 · 08/12/2006 14:18

Senora - thanks - ds will not take a dummy - he goes ballistic! I think I will just have to bite the bullet...

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SmileysPeople · 08/12/2006 14:19

About the routine and SWMNBM I mean. But I know let's not go there.

SenoraPostrophe · 08/12/2006 14:21

SWMNBM - she who must not be maimed?

SenoraPostrophe · 08/12/2006 14:22

cm - I only use the dummy to get hi9m back to sleep. ds1 didn't take one either - I used to put him down in a pram and then rock him back to sleep (but eventually used controlled crying with him - I think because I left it too late)

cruisemum1 · 08/12/2006 14:24

at nighttime he was going 8 - 10 hrs until last week, now he goes for around 6 - 7 which i am still happy with. The regularity of daytime feeds is rather restricting though - to say the least and not really that regular as i sometimes bung in an extra feed if i have to do school run or suchlike, iykwim

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cruisemum1 · 08/12/2006 14:34

senora - are you bf exclusively? How often?

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SmileysPeople · 08/12/2006 14:35

I meant SWMNBN. Or did I?

PortAndLemonaid · 08/12/2006 14:41

Try putting him in a powered swing and forget about the "ooh, you're just making a rod for your own back / building bad habits woemongers". It was the only way DS would nap at that age (my very first post on MN was similar to this one) and I needed to swaddle his arms as well, but then he'd nap beautifully (the only problem was that I had to kind of jiggle him to sleep and then get him into the swing without waking him as he wouldn't actually fall asleep in it).

He moved on to napping properly without the swing later on, but I needed it in those early months to save my own sanity.

That said, it doesn't work for everyone (but then nothing in the world of babies seems to work for everyone).

I think once you persuade him to take bigger naps his feeds will naturally space out a bit, by the way. It worked that way for us, at least.

SenoraPostrophe · 08/12/2006 14:44

am exclusively breastfeeding, yes.

snap on night times too! (well, nearly - he was doing 8-9 hours, now 6-7). In fact I had been putting off sorting out his daytime sleep because the nights were good, but changed my mind after a 6 hour night the other day. he does feed roughly every 2-3 hours, but there's usually a bigger gap at some point during the day, of about 4-5 hours. he seems to think he's hungry when actually he's sleepy sometimes too.

cruisemum1 · 08/12/2006 14:47

senora are you sure our lo's are not clones?! wonder why the nighttimes have changed? my ds has a major suckathon before settling at night....yours???

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SenoraPostrophe · 08/12/2006 14:59

yup.

but I've just realised he's 14 weeks, not 13. doesn't time fly?

SenoraPostrophe · 08/12/2006 15:00

I take it you have a bouncy chair so you can get your tea eaten in the evenings?

cruisemum1 · 08/12/2006 15:13

oh my god yes!!! in front of the tv sometimes

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SenoraPostrophe · 08/12/2006 15:15

now that's where we diverge: we have our tea in front of the tv always.

cruisemum1 · 08/12/2006 16:33

if I'm honest - so do we!

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sleepfinder · 08/12/2006 18:28

my ds is almost 14 wks and has been sleeping through the nights since he had a cold at wk 9 - but his naps are generally 40-60 mins in the early morning after his first bottle, another 15-30 mins nap late morning and depending on his activities (prams, outings etc) where he may or may not sleep, a quick 20 mins nap around 4.30 before his last bottle and bed...

sometimes this varies wildly - there was a day of screaming when he had his cold and didn't sleep at all, no matter what i tried - pram, swinging, bouncy chair, music, dark rooms etc.

i think they decide if they need sleep or not.

but maybe you can just take him out in the pram for a quick 20 mins and see if he sleeps beyond that on returning home, for a little while? would that work?

Jam77 · 08/12/2006 19:34

Hi All - DD is a good sleeper at night (thank God) but her daytime naps are unpredictable..somes days good, spme bad, some in bouncy chair, some in cot, but she is getting more and more ratty when has not napped
Also (she's on a roll now ) why won't DD nap all day then decide she just has to sleep at 4 pm?????????
Answers on a post please

lyra41 · 08/12/2006 20:19

I eventually had to accept that ds just refused to sleep in his cot in the day, so I put him for naps in his cosy fleece lined flat-lying pushchair. if needs be i push him round, joggle the pram or whatever.

at night i generally feed him to sleep on the breast then gently lie him in his cot.

it generally all works ok.

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cruisemum1 · 08/12/2006 21:42

Thanks for all responses so far.
Portandlemonaid - I would love to be that relaxed about it but I really would like him to be able to nap in his cot as I think it must be better for him all round esp long term. My dd did it without any fuss and she always napped beautifully.
Sleepfinder - our lo's nap schedules (such as they are seem pretty similar tho ds has a longer one in the morning. Does he seem to thrive on that little sleep? my ds defo gets cranky if he's underslept (is that a new word??) Congrats on sleeping through tho. My ds was doing that until last week .
Jam - we must stop meeting like this!!! You and I obviously have the same concerns...
lyra - I did the pram thing for a while and it did work but I got sick of wheeling him around indoors. I just want to fix this and don't know how? Now he is crying for the fourth time tonight even though he is shattered - oh the joys of motherhood

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cruisemum1 · 08/12/2006 21:44

lyra - I also bf to sleep - another habit I'd like to break as I have dd nearly 9yrs and it's not fair on her . How long does lo take to nod off when you bf? Mine takes about 2 hours of nipping away there until he finally gives in.

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Jam77 · 08/12/2006 22:14

Hey cruise I think we do have the same concerns, there should be an automatic link on MN that joins us to each others active threads!!!! I am feeling a bit put DD in her cot in own room last night (seriously couldn't fit in moses basket anymore) and it's like the first link in the chain has broken (even though we all slept really well!) mixed emotions. I know what you mean about the nap in the cot - I keep trying but DD only naps for 40 mins or so up there

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