Am I being stupid to rule out very popular names?

(53 Posts)
ricecakeaddict Sat 26-Oct-13 17:17:47

The only names my dh has suggested so far are Charlotte, Sophia, Jessica and Emily. He likes Sam for a boy and basically wants something traditional, popular and well-known. I like these names but we have a very common surname so I want to rule out any top 20 (well, maybe top 50!) names to prevent our child having exactly the same name as someone else in their class.
Am I being stupid in restricting our search to less popular names (and dismissing top 50 names we really like) just to avoid them being one of 3 or 4 Sophias, Emilys etc in their class?
We're in Surrey if that helps....

I don't think Top 50 means "very popular". DS1 was about 23 in his year and we've only ever met one other. DS2 otoh was #1 in his year and is rarely the only one in any group (eg toddler group).

Even the #1 name in a year is given to less than half of one percent of babies, and once you get below about #10 the numbers tail off quickly.

Some names are popular because they're good.

Some names appear to be unpopular but are easily confused with more popular names (eg Isobel isn't high but is "the same name" as Isabelle/Isabella etc which add up to be ubiquitous roaringly popular).

I think insisting on #50+ is cutting your nose off to spite your face. Avoiding top 20 would avoid the mega popular, but I don't think there's any need to go lower if the names you like are say #36 or #39.

On the other other hand, OP's DH has no imagination whatsoever!

Icedfinger Thu 31-Oct-13 07:26:33

In the current reception year at our local school there are sixty children, 6 of which are boys called Jack which was the number one name that year!!

YellowDahlias Thu 31-Oct-13 07:18:42

My DD had a top 10 name the year of her birth and it's moved up since. We didn't realise it was so popular when we named her. It was a bit of a compromise name as we were stuck.

However she's never been in a nursery with another girl with the same name and she's the only one in her school class.

Her surname is different though so she's very, very unlikely to run across someone with the exact same name.

exoticfruits Thu 31-Oct-13 07:08:10

I would go for what you like. I find it very funny when parents have gone all out to be original and then they end up with another in the same class! It happens quite a lot and they are the ones really unhappy about it!

Lubiloo Thu 31-Oct-13 06:49:59

It's not just about fashionable names falling out of fashion and sounding 'dated' imo. It is about having a name that identifies you. Being the third Sophie or fourth Harry in a class or at work can be confusing! If you also have a popular surname then it becomes even more difficult!

There are SO many lovely names to choose from, why restrict ourselves to the same few ones?

qumquat Thu 31-Oct-13 03:21:55

More important to pick a name you love I think. All names date but so what? People can tell I'm in my mid thirties by looking at me, having a typical name for a 30 something is no hardship.

Theresomethingaboutdairy Mon 28-Oct-13 22:42:18

Hmmm, I am in Surrey too. DD1(9) is an Emily, it was the number 1 name when she was born, iirc, and she is the only one in her school, DD2 (3) is an Olivia, it too was the number one name when she was born and she is the only one in her nursery (so far!) DS1(8) is a Henry. Thinking this was relatively unusual at the time we were surprised to find a school full of Henry's! DD3 (6 months) is called Isabella, we do know a couple of Isabella's but they are older. As you can see, popularity didn't put us off-go with your instinct-good luck x

RufflingFeathers Mon 28-Oct-13 21:07:22

Had 4 DD, only the last one has a vaguely popular name. I chose it because I liked it but was distressed that her name peg at nursery included her surname initial ! arrh.
It's not the end of the world, but FWIW, I am much happier with my slightly unusual other 3 DDs' names !

hawkmcqueen Mon 28-Oct-13 20:49:44

I don't get the obsession with trying to avoid a name that will date - we are all born of a generation and the average life span in the UK is what, 70+? So what's wrong with being identified as being part of your generation? And then we die and nobody cares :-)
Also, my name is unusual but there were two in my class at school!
Basically there's no winning formula, pick what you love, it's a word you will say a lot so you gotta like saying it and if that happens to be Emily or the like then that's okay.

MrsOakenshield Mon 28-Oct-13 09:03:43

I would choose names that you like! Just because a name isn't in the top whatever now doesn't mean there won't be a bunch of them in his/her class once they start school. I wonder what those who are so anti popular names do when they find out their pfb isn't the one-and-only in their class - change their name??

Bakingtins Mon 28-Oct-13 08:56:36

My ds1 has a name that is persistently in the top 10. He has never had another child with the same name in any of his toddler groups or classes at school. There is one other child in the school (of 300 kids) with the same name. It does depend on area, our neighbourhood is v socially and racially mixed so if you have a "naice white middle class name" you are in a minority to start with.
Ds2 has a name that is low in the top 100 and yet has already been in several groups with another child of the same name.
Choose a name you both love and don't worry too much about it's ranking.

Fantail Mon 28-Oct-13 08:19:14

My name has never been in the top 50 and normally hovers around 100. At secondary school I was one of 5 in my year, but that was it for the entire school of 1200 girls. We had all been born in different parts o the country too so even geography isn't a good predictor.

zipzap Mon 28-Oct-13 06:41:22

I chose a name that was at the bottom of the top 100 names for ds1 - old, biblical, everybody has heard of it but when we told my mother she was horrified; she didn't think you were 'allowed'(!) to use it as a name in this day and age. Fast forward about 4 weeks and she'd been talking to people as new grannies do - and discovered 7 others that had had babies called by ds1's name within those few weeks - mostly grandchildren of friend's, the golf pro's wife, the new baby she was cooing over in the supermarket...

Needless to say it has got a lot more popular in the intervening years; at infant school it was the most popular boy's name in the year. He's now at junior school and despite it being a big school, simlar catchment area to his. Infant school, there's only one other in the school.

I have a friend that gave her child a very unusual name (think there only 3-5 of them registered in England that year). And yet one of them turned up at the same local playgroup so could well end up at the same school...

I guess the motto of this is that the tables and name stats only tell part of the story... You never know how they are going to your local area.

Wishfulmakeupping Mon 28-Oct-13 06:13:02

I avoided top 50 my dd name but dd name is familiar but I still haven't met any babies or adults with that name but I know from some threads on here that dd name is extremely popular down south where there are lots so geography plays a big part. There is a tool on ONS to check popular names by region can't find it on phone so maybe have a scout around on there if you have 5 minutes

Florrieboo Mon 28-Oct-13 05:54:58

I used to think that it was awful to name a child anything in the top 100, my boys names are outside of the top 100 and I wore that as a badge of pride (they are however well known names) and then when DD came along, I loved names that were much more popular. She has a name that is in the top 50. I don't care, in fact if it was number 1 next year it would not bother me either. DD's name has climbed the charts rapidly, it is "of the moment" but, it is her great grandmothers name, so if she had been born 10 years ago and we had named her that, then it would have been very unusual and outside the top 100. That all said, we have a very unusual surname so whatever names we use our children will always stand out a little due to that.

Personally, I wouldn't allow my genuine love of a name to be overruled by it's hypothetical popularity.

ZingWantsCake Mon 28-Oct-13 04:09:49

we know 2 sisters who are Jessica and Charlotte.

a friend Charlotte just had another girl - Emily

two of our nieces our Sophia and Emily

DS2 is Samuel and DS1's best friend is Sam

all lovely people with great names. choose what you like, fashions change, I would not care about that.

I was one of five in my class. Seriously. We were not this name but like this Jessica, Jessika, Jessie, Jess and Jay. To this day I don't get called my full name because of school.

However, everyone can spell my name and it's easy.

emmyloo2 Mon 28-Oct-13 02:50:44

You are not being stupid. It was one of my criteria - not in the top 50. I was a bit gutted when Rose entered the Top 50 here, this year as it was my favourite name for DD. However, I stayed true to my criteria and discounted it! However, it wasn't really because it was in the Top 50 but because I felt it was in a category of very popular, flower names. So I don't think you are being silly, unless you absolutely adored a name. I just didn't want a name that I felt like I heard at every playground and of which there were 5 in the same day care. I wanted something a little less used. But that's just my opinion. There are some lovely names which are very popular. For example I love Isabelle for a girl. I just couldn't use it because it was far too popular for me. Popular because it is so lovely.

20wkbaby Sun 27-Oct-13 16:12:02

There is an element of names being fashionable, but I think they become fashionable because people think they are lovely names. They don't become popular for other reasons, ultimately people name their children names they like and short of the majority of other reasons (initials spelling something embarassing etc) this is the only reason to give a child a particular name.

You have to accept that there is no guarantee that you will not end up choosing an unusual name that ends up being the most popular name of that year.

I find the idea of striving for a unique name more ridiculous than naming a child any of the suggested popular names because you like them.

Mrsindecision Sun 27-Oct-13 16:07:20

I've just looked at the Telegraph birth announcements for 2012 and Isla was actually in joint 6th position along with Charlotte. Lily was also in joint 19th along with Poppy, Flora and Sophia so I'm not sure where you've got your information from Newbie?? smile

SharpLily Sun 27-Oct-13 16:01:30

In the end, how you feel about the name is more important than what some poll says about its current popularity. If you love it, it's the right one, no matter what fashion dictates.

I have the same worries - I've ruled a number of names I actually really like just because they've been used on Eastenders, Corrie etc. Bit pissed off now because my dear nan's name, which I'd love to use, has become fashionable and that means I see it being abused by people who can't spell on Facebook and used in conjunction with phrases like 'my lil princess', which gives me the horrors. I'm looking for a name that's not wacky and far out but which I will never hear said by Bianca Jackson or a Hollyoaks character.

NewbieMcNewbie Sun 27-Oct-13 15:45:30

That's a good point about it bring geographical - and also, dare I say, social? Look at the Telegraph birth announcements. Very few Islas, Lilys and Avas but lots of Florences, Matildas and Alices. I was asking about a name on here that is somewhere in the high 200s and was surprised to find several MNers had DDs with that name.

Also there is a lot more variety in names now compared to 50 yrs ago so actually fewer children have top 10 names.

sandberry Sun 27-Oct-13 14:48:02

I think in the modern world with email addresses, it is sensible to avoid common name surname combinations to save your DD having all her emails sent to a different Emily Smith. No one can ever remember that the Emily Smith they know is emilysmith4@xyz.com. This is particularly an issue if she works for a large organization like the NHS.

For the same reason it is good to avoid uncommon spellings of traditional names or names which are very unusual as nobody can remember that Emily Smith is actually Emalee Smith or how to spell a very unusual name.

So no I think you are right if you have a common surname to avoid popular names like Charlotte, Sophia etc and modern trends like Isla and Darcy and go for less common but easy to spell names.

TheBookofRuth Sun 27-Oct-13 10:20:00

The thing is, a lot of it is geographical. According to national statistics, DD's name isn't even the top 100 - but I've recently met another 3 around her age locally. So you might think you've picked a less popular name, only to find several other people have had the same idea!

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