to write true but slighty vicious comments about DDs father online for all to see?

[twynkle]

I have recently started writing a parenting blog and want it to be honest and thought provoking, but I'm not sure how far I should take it.

slummysinglemummy.wordpress.com/

I have two girls, 7 and 14, and although I wouldn't actively encourage it they could potentially both read it, as could their fathers, should I write about them.

I would never lie or be deliberately or unreasonably hurtful, but some of my parenting frustrations are bound to involve them and their repsective Dads - how much is ok to share??

[FlamingoCrimbo]

Nothing, IMHO. Don't share anything. How awful do you think your dds would feel reading it now, or later on in life. What about how they'd feel knowing everyone else had read the same stuff?

I wrote a blog for ages, then stopped and deleted it completely when I realised quite how much I knew about random children I had no other link to other than the blogosphere.

Unless your children have actively asked you to write honestly about their lives (which is what will happen if you write a parenting blog), then it is not moral to do so.

[AnyFuckerForAMincePie]

god save us from people who have to "share" everything

bad form to criticise the dc's father

get over yourself

what happened to personal diaries (that are banned for your dc) if you need to write stuff down ?

YABU

[IneedacleanerIamalazyslattern]

Don't do it honestly.
There is every chance that they will all read it. If their dad reads it you will lose so much face and any moral high ground you may have and if your dd's read it that is honestly bad.
My ex grew up listening to his dad slag off his mum to other people and him but his mother never ever did and she was the wounded party in that divorce and guess who he has more respect for now.

It is ok to share things about them but never ever honestly please say anything negative about their fathers if there is any chance they could ever find out it will be you who ends up looking bad.

[LoopyLoo2]

I wouldn't. Think Liz Jones. Her husband may have been a bit of a t**t (and Liz herself an even bigger one!!) but it seemed very unfair writing about very personal thoughts and feelings about someone else for all the world to read. I actually felt very sorry for him.

Also not fair on your DCs!

[FabIsGettingReadyForXmas]

What good can come of it? If you are pissed off with him get it out some other way.

[BitOfFunderthemistletoe]

The Liz Jones comparison is a good one. You will look like a bitter loon. Don't stoop so low, you are better than that.

[twynkle]

You are all right of course, very sensible ladies. I do generally keep my fury to a top secret personal diary..

[pagwatch]

Terrible terrible notion.

Its not thought provoking and insightful. It is mastabatory, a totally selfish release of your bitterness.
Throwing this into cyberspace for all to see is not a gift to your children. He may be terrible but your children should be allowed to love their father.

In ten years time you will feel a total twat.

Celebrities perpetuate this egotistical notion that revealing the minutia of their lives is a gift to others. It isn't. A bit of dignity will serve better inthe long run

[pagwatch]

twynkle

sorry aboutthat.
Not only did I x-post with you but I was venting as your post touched a nerve...

( terrible situation with woman I know endlessly telling everyone about her 'awful' ex and I have to spend time with her very sad DD)

Ignore me. The other are more tempered in their replies.

[AnyFuckerForAMincePie]

absolutely agree pag

smacks of self-indulgence to a huge degree

[BitOfFunderthemistletoe]

And pagwatch is always right So there you go.

[pagwatch]

...

[BitOfFunderthemistletoe]

...

[twynkle]

I'm sure you ARE right pagwatch, and don't apologise - I wouldn't have asked if I didn't want honest opinions. I asked because I wanted to be challenged, to be forced to think about my motivations, and you have done just that, so thank you. Any kind of writing should retain it's dignity and should get attention for being well crafted, not sensational, and that's what I needed reminding of.

[AnyFuckerForAMincePie]

am I still on MN ??

an AIBU where the OP realises she was actually, BU and acknowledges that with good grace

am I pissed or summat

[Earthstar]

Don't write anything that could potentially cause offense or upset to your children or their fathers.

Vent to your friends in private.
Or write a diary.

Find something else to blog about.

[Maveta]

I disagree, I follow one or two blogs and do find them interesting, mostly because I enjoy the women´s take on life, the way they write and how they make me laugh. It´s like mumsnet but (for me at least) not interactive, they post things and I often agree with them and enjoy knowing other people think the same weird, random things.

I wouldn´t slag off their dads though and would always write with the knowledge that they might one day read it and you don´t want to have share things they might have rather kept private.

[BitOfFunderthemistletoe]

Journalist? I didn't click the link. I can see why the mere mention of Liz Jones would pull you up short then though

[twynkle]

I am not a PROPER journalist yet - just bluffing at the moment - I am really a fundraiser in disguise, trying to forge myself a new career!

Spice it up a bit? Like what sort of thing? Sordid sex scenes? Unfortunately don't get much of that!

[BitOfFunderthemistletoe]

Been too ker-nacked even for this place, Shiney. Have texted you.

Twynkle- I vote racy sex too. Make it up. A few tips on how not to write here...

[Janos]

No, no, no. Not a good idea at all.

However awful he (they?) might be, however justified, just don't.

It's almost guaranteed to backfire on you.