My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

AIBU?

to hope my husband will 'help' our baby girl mark my first mothers' day?

21 replies

ilovewashingnappies · 20/02/2008 20:42

I am really looking forward to this Mothers' day as last year when we were pregnant I day dreamed for hours about wht it would be like etc etc....

DH is fantastic husband/father etc but is a man [gasps at lack of political correctness] and I'm sure he wont think too much about it.

Don;t want to ask for a gift as such but would love some kind of momento....

Am I being a cow?

OP posts:
Report
lizziemun · 20/02/2008 20:46

No your not.

Why don't you give him a gentle reminder, this is what i do with DH.

I just say to him 'Do you want me to get a card for your mum for mothers day on xxx date.

Report
constancereader · 20/02/2008 20:47

No you are not being a cow. I personally spell things out for my dh, it is the only way.

Report
Guitargirl · 20/02/2008 20:50

Tell him what you're getting your Mum for mother's day and ask him what he wants to get for MIL - that should do the trick.

Last year when it was my first mother's day, I was woken up by DP to request my help changing DD's nappy as she'd had one of her 'emergency poos' which required all hands on deck and everything cleaned within four feet of the changing area...he had totally forgotten....

Then they both went food shopping and he obviously saw the signs in the shop windows while they were out and came back with a lovely card and mug .

Report
mumdebump · 20/02/2008 20:50

So not a cow. In similar position. Have to drop lots of subtle (and some not so subtle hints). Usually works.

Report
berolina · 20/02/2008 20:53

I have made my expectations crystal clear. It's my birthday on MD this year too.

Report
cory · 20/02/2008 20:56

YANBU. This is the time that you build up a beautiful family tradition for years to come- can't be done without a bit of nudging

And it's probably a bit early to expect dc to bring you breakfast in bed all of his/her bat.

I am giving dd (11) very strong hints about the sort of attention I think would be appropriate for this year's Mothering Sunday. Last year she and ds (then 6) went round the COOP on their own and got together food for a basic 3 course meal (I did provide the money though), which they then prepared. This year I am hinting that maybe something a bit more home-cooked than ovenready fish and chips might be within their scope... Dd seems to think that this is totally OTT and tells me most of her friends aren't even trusted to boil the kettle. Pathetic!

But she's not actually as gormless as she tries to make out- if I stop nagging now, I may actually get what I want.

Report
strawberrylace · 20/02/2008 21:04

Def not unreasonable. I have said that it is DH's job to help DS to mark mothers' day, as DS is only 4.5 months, and hasn't learnt to shop yet....
I have also reminded DH that mothers' day comes before fathers' day.....

Report
FourPlusOne · 20/02/2008 21:08

I said to DH the other day "If the DCs are not sure what to get me for mothers day then I would really like a voucher for a facial". Until that point I don't think he knew that it was coming soon. That way we are all happy! Would also need to remind him to get his mum something so it has to be mentioned at some point.

I remember that on my first mothers day I was really worried that DH would forget. I didn't mention it so was v relieved when DC1 was carried into the room with a card in his hand. Think I might have cried if DH had forgotten!

Report
Starbear · 20/02/2008 21:13

Drop hugh hints! My man is lovely but just a man. Told him before we got married don't forget valentines as I never got valentine cards as a kid and felt left out. He Never Never forgets. I forgot our anniversary. So none of us are prefect. have you noticed I've already had a few glasses.

Report
ConnorTraceptive · 20/02/2008 21:15

Not unreasonable but don't pussyfoot around with subtle hints just tell him that mothers (and fathers) day means alot to you so he's expected to put in the effort.

If he's anything like my DH he'll appreciate the heads up!

Report
mumblesmummy · 20/02/2008 21:36

My DP has said he's buying me a mother day prezzie from the bump... and he thought it up all by himself.. so maybe he's already getting you something and you're assuming he won't.

Just say all excitedly 'I can't wait to get my first mum's day prezzie of dd.. you best get your thinking cap on, she'll be relying on her daddy'.

Then it's said. And he can't get out of it.

Report
mumblesmummy · 20/02/2008 21:37

I'm so sorry, I';ve assumed your baby is a girl.... I don't even know why!!! I take back the DD and make it DC.

Report
eleusis · 20/02/2008 21:57

My first Mother's Day was crap. It was five years ago and it has spoiled the whole day for me forever more. I hope you don't suffer a similar fate.

Report
moaningminnie2020 · 20/02/2008 21:59

I'm in the same boat, spent half of Mother's Day last year under GA while they yanked DD out of me...so I will be v peeved if DH doesn't manage a card and token gift!

Report
RosJ · 20/02/2008 22:57

I said to DP today "I think DS really wants to get me some flowers for mother's day but he will need some help getting to the shop, choosing them, and paying for them". I will leave it at that and hope it works. Last year, I didn't get anything apparently because I dropped too many hints....

Report
Sarahjct · 20/02/2008 23:42

My dd is 6 weeks old and DH is generally clueless. My hopes aren't high...

I don't wish to hijack this thread but is it acceptable to buy my own card and write nice things in it?

Report
eleusis · 22/02/2008 11:55

No, if you do that, you will have to do it every year. However, it is perfectly acceptable to go buy yourself a really expensive day at a really expensive spa 1/2 way round the world if he forgets to to pamper you on Mother's Day.

Report
hifi · 22/02/2008 12:08

i always shove a card for his mother under his nose a week before, then watch as slight panic overcomes him.

Report
TsarChasm · 22/02/2008 12:15

Ooh he must help her remember it especially as it's the first one. Can't you just in a jokey way let him know it's important.

I clearly remember the first MD when I'd had dd (9 yrs ago now ). Dh had put some flowers in her room from her to me and the note said 'To Mummy, Thank you for having me'

Report
nappyaddict · 22/02/2008 12:27

am i the only mother on here who hates getting flowers?

Report
hifi · 22/02/2008 12:29

i dont hate flowers, only when they cost 50 quid a bunch on mothers day, father have the money.

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.