Household Finances

[NuckyS]

Prompted by a comment one of my family made about household finances, I'm just wondering what people consider an equitable arrangement within their household.

I work FT and DW works PT - the proportion of our contribution to the finances is about 75-25. I pay:

• mortgage
  
• loan repayments
  
• Council Tax
  
• groceries/clothing for DCs
  
• fuel
  
• entertainment (TV licence, streaming films, etc.)
  
• insurance
  

We split utilities proportionately on our income.

I've never had a problem with this arrangement (although it leaves me with no spare cash left over in any given month) until that comment the other day.

What do others think?

[OurBlanche]

I think it entirely depends on what your DW has left over at the end of any given month... and the balance of everything else in your lives.

[seaweed123]

Impossible to say, without knowing exact amounts and how much spending money your DW gets. Personally, we have a set amount of "spends" each which we keep from our individual wages, and then everything else goes into a joint pot for bills and savings. You could be effectively doing the same, or could be totally getting a raw deal. Depends on the numbers.

[arethereanyleftatall]

Split up the essentials however you like, but you both should have the same spending money.

[QforCucumber]

DP and I both work full time - household outgoing come in at about £1200, we each pay £600. DP does earn about 6k a year more than me but he also has higher personal outgoings than me (we each pay for our own cars, credit cards and mobiles etc and his car cost monthly is double mine)
If either of us is ever short at any given time the other covers things, no real qualms about it.
I am soon to go on maternity leave and will lose approx £100 a week but we have savings to cover it for the full 39 weeks I'll be off so that will supplement my income to still cover the outgoings of the house. If that makes any sense to anyone else i've done well.

I don't think you working FT and her PT matters, its the earnings - she could work PT but earn double the income you do.

[Junosmum]

It depends - why does he work part time? How much does he have spare at the end of the month? What's the ratio of your earnings? Do you earn 75% of the household income?

The way we work it (and I'm not saying this is right or wrong) is we both pay a set sum in to a joint account, this at the moment is 50% of the household bills as we are both earning with 2k of each other. We have each paid in less than the other at points - mainly when we both went back to uni. I have to make that figure plus my personal expenses or I have to cut some personal expenses, unless my lack of earning is due to redundancy or we've decided I'll work part time for family reasons, e.g. child care etc. In which case we'd do it as a percentage of our incomes. E.g I earn 50% of what OH earn therefore I pay in 50% of what OH does, we then have the same percentage left over each month for personal spends.

[VimFuego101]

How much does she have left over? You should both have equal spending money.

[Perfectlypurple]

We both work full time. Dh earns more than me, but the deposit and all the lump sum stuff for furniture etc has come from me and gifts from my family.

We pay everything into the joint account and then have a standing order to our own accounts so we have the same amount of money to spend each month. Although I do end up buying stuff for the house out of my money.

[NotMyMonkey]

It's only a problem if you or dw think it is. If you are both happy with the arrangement then I wouldn't care what other people think/do with their finances.

[HeadDreamer]

I think as long as you both end up with the same spending money it's fine. We put in all our salary into a joint account. Save and spend household money from it. (Mortgage, children's stuff, food, utilities). At the end of the month, we put aside some money for big stuff like holidays and cars, and then split the rest into two halves and put that back into our own account for spending.

I run a budget and use YNAB. DH is welcome to look if he wants, but he doesn't because he's not that interested in the money side of things. He's just happy he has some fun money at the end of the month.

[Mistigri]

We pool everything, although I earn 3-4 times what DH does.

I think once you have kids, one partner's income almost invariably takes a hit because of childcaring duties - this partner may bring less to the household in financial terms, but they contribute more in practical ways. It's also important to consider that the non-working or part-time working partner is not only sacrificing current income for the sake of the family, but also future earnings.

[expatinscotland]

We pool everything.

[nameinlights]

Dh and I look everything. There is no 'his money' and 'my money'. I've always earned more than him, until I was on mat leave. I just don't understand how finances can work with they're split if you live together.

[laffymeal]

Pool everything, we never had enough money to have separate finances, we needed every penny. I don't understand why or how people can have "my money" when they have dcs who constantly need financed.

[Scholes34]

Would it be a problem to pool everything? Certainly makes sense if you have DC.

[dodobookends]

Prompted by a comment one of my family made about household finances...

What did they say, OP?

[EllyHigginbottom]

I don't understand people who are married, intend on staying married, have children etc having separate money. To what end?

[AbeSaidYes]

do you have children and childcare costs?

[gamerchick]

Yes what did they say?

[WhyDoesGastonBark]

My Husband pays for almost all of the bills, I pay for the family car running costs (except the loan on it he pays that), tax on his car and everything for our son. I work from home earning very little but more than I would have if I worked FT elsewhere and paid out for childcare. Any extra money I get (from extra work) is used to fund our leisure so holiday, days out etc.
this works for us. He pays out more than I do but he earns more and I do the housework and childcare.
Works for us.

[Topseyt]

It might be relevant to know what the comment was that has prompted thism

[Topseyt]

*this.

[NuckyS]

It was pretty throwaway - we were discussing how much (or how little money we have) and when I said about our finance arrangements the response I got was "[snort] That sounds pretty unfair."

I didn't take it any further cos to be honest I don't know if it is unfair or not. I do know that I hardly have a penny left after the bills go out on the 1st of each month.

We don't pay for any childcare but do have fairly hefty commuting costs.

[Tfoot75]

All of our income goes into a joint account and also all expenditure. So we don't have any separate money apart from ISAs. I don't think I'd be happy with any other way of doing things as every purchase should be a family purchase in my mind? That doesn't mean we can't buy things as we are relatively free with our spending but anything that was over say £50 would usually be discussed.

It sounds as if you're paying for virtually everything, so it depends if your DW has some left over each month to spend on herself, as you don't?

[CalleighDoodle]

How much spaee cash does your dw have left over? If it is much more then yes you need to look at it more closely.

[AndLeavesthatweregreenturnedto]

neither of us have spending money there isnt enough to go round, no xmas or bday pressies.

I have recently taken charge of finances and now we save up, had a hard year but next year we can do more all together as a family ( theatre, meals out, few nights away and one longer holiday and one for us alone )

its all pooled together basically. no matter what we each earned though would always pool together.