My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

AIBU?

with my 10yo bedtimes?

37 replies

Glindathegoodwitch · 16/06/2015 14:35

She goes to bed at 8.30pm during the weeknights which I thought of as quite reasonable but now the evenings are so light? I feel like I am putting her to bed in the middle of the day!

I let her go to the local park last night for the 1st time with her friends. It's not far from her house but I am very nervous with her out and crossing roads. (She was hit by a car at 6 years old and badly injured).
She was sue home at 7.30 but then some of her friends came with her and played in our garden until 8.15pm which made me wonder what time do they go to bed if they are only getting in from playing at that time?

Should I be letting her stay up longer?

OP posts:
Report
Glindathegoodwitch · 16/06/2015 14:37

My autocorrect is awful. Obviously it is our house. And She was due home

OP posts:
Report
midnightvelvet01 · 16/06/2015 14:37

My DS is 10 in August & he goes to bed at 8:30. Well actually he gets into bed at 7 then he reads until 8:30. I may extend it to 8:45 once he's 10 :)

Report
Baies · 16/06/2015 14:38

I'd extend it to 9 ish especially in the summer

My 8.5 year old is lights out at about 8.45/9pm usually

Report
MrsNextDoor · 16/06/2015 14:41

My DD is ten and I have her in bed between 8.30 and 9.30 depending. Sometimes she's just not tired...so I let her read for a while. I wouldn't personally make a habit of allowing her to play in th garden with friends during school terms as late as 8.15...now and then it's fine I'm sure.

Report
Seeline · 16/06/2015 14:41

My nearly 11 yo is usually in bed at about 8 and reads until 8.30. She is sometimes a bit later at the weekend - guides doesn't finish 'til 9 on a Friday.
She needs her sleep though, and I usually have to wake her at 7.15 each morning. Sometimes she takes herself off to bed earlier if she wants to. Not sure how she will cope with secondary school in September.

Report
LadyMaryofDownton · 16/06/2015 14:42

My 10yo DC goes to bed at 8:30 lights out at 9. I think what your doing is reasonable. My DC needs lots of sleep.

Report
MrsLeighHalfpenny · 16/06/2015 14:44

I would certainly have her at home, reading in bed or relaxing in pyjamas if not actually in bed by 8.30 at that age. It's too late to be playing out when there's school the next day.

Report
Glindathegoodwitch · 16/06/2015 14:45

Oh no definitely not a habit MrsNextDoor - I am pregnant with DC2 and was taking a lay down and enjoying listening to them playing from the back bedroom for a while. I think it was more of a selfish me just taking the break of an evening.

Glad others agree, think I will agree with the reading time until 9pm.

OP posts:
Report
NRomanoff · 16/06/2015 14:53

My 10 year old goes to bed at 9pm. She actually goes up earlier and reads. Any later and she is in a bad mood all the next day.

Report
carrie74 · 16/06/2015 14:58

Mine is 10 next month. She's in bed between 8 & 8:30 usually, and then can read (and sometimes she plays a little quietly in her room). Unfortunately, she's a bit of a sleep denier (always has been), so is often still awake when I go up to bed at 10-10:30. I wouldn't want her downstairs being even more stipulated though. I actually find the further on we go in the term, the harder she finds to fall asleep (despite being more tired)

Report
reni1 · 16/06/2015 15:06

Depends when she has to get up and how much sleep she needs. My 7yo needs around 10.5 to 11h of sleep, so 9pm bedtime gets her up at 8, which is when she needs to be up. If I needed her up at 7, I'd adjust bedtime accordingly.

Report
Eva50 · 16/06/2015 15:07

Ds3 is almost 9. He goes to bed between 9:30 and 9:45 ish. On nice evenings it's not unusual for the children living round about to play out until 8:30/9:00. I would want him home from the park long before that but am happy for him to play in the garden or where I can see him from the house.

Report
morelikeguidelines · 16/06/2015 15:09

My 6 yo is supposed to be in bed with lights out by 8.30. I have to say with the long evenings that has been hard recently - as you say it feels like middle of the day and mine is much younger!

Report
NorbertDentressangle · 16/06/2015 15:11

10yo DS goes to bed at 8.30pm on a school night but tends to be reading until about 9.15pm (or later if he's really getting into his book!)

He does enjoy his sleep though so if, at weekends or on holiday, he stays up later then he usually sleeps later the next day without a problem.

My friends son of the same age gets up 6-7am every morning, even after lots of late nights so he can be tired and irritable whereas DS tends to catch up and sleep late quite easily.

Report
grumpysquash · 16/06/2015 15:12

Big admission of guilt here then......my 9yo DS goes to bed about 10:30pm. An early night would be 10 and they are rare. On a Cubs night he doesn't get home until 8:30pm and then eats dinner (he has a tea at after school club, but that is about 4:30, so hungry again), then a shower etc.
He falls asleep straight away and is usually up first, around 6.45am.
But the schedules above sound more appropriate, IMO

Report
WorraLiberty · 16/06/2015 15:14

Bedtimes depend on the individual child's sleep needs and also what time they get up in the morning.

My DS (16) goes to bed at 9.30pm on a school night (self imposed) and around 10pm at the weekends.

I'm not sure what time he falls asleep though, so it's more 'room time' than bedtime really.

Report
SocialMediaAddict · 16/06/2015 15:18

My 10 year old twins go bed at 8.30, lights off at 9pm.

They are allowed to stay up later at the weekends but they sleep in.

Report
CakeNinja · 16/06/2015 15:30

Dd is 11 and I tuck her in at about 8:30. She probably reads but it's bloody hard work dragging her out of bed at 7:30 for school. Literally no idea what will happen from September as she will need to leave for school at that time.
Can't send her to bed earlier as she will not sleep but she will need to be up an hour earlier Confused

Report
Getthewonderwebout · 16/06/2015 15:41

11year old goes to bed around 9/9.15 and is generally asleep by the time I've been to the loo and gone back downstairs. He seems to have hit a pre-teen exhaustion stage though as doesn't wake up until 7.45 though so is getting 10.5 hrs a night.

Report
GooseyLoosey · 16/06/2015 15:43

We aim for 8.30 and usually hit 9 in the summer.

Report
wigglesrock · 16/06/2015 15:55

My almost 10 year old can play out up until 8.30 if she wants, in quick shower, bed at 9pm, lights out at 9.15/9.30pm. She's usually in long before that. She can stay up an hour later at weekends but still needs to be in by 8.30pm. There's less than 2 weeks of school left where I am and it's still light very late so I'm happy enough with her timings.

Report
Unreasonableandpetty · 16/06/2015 16:34

I am pretty lax in the nicer weather tbh. I tend to go more for the play it my ear approach aiming to have them in by half 8. I live in the north of Scotland so we get a lot of daylight in the summer months but a lot of darkness in winter so I like to make the most of it.
If they seem tired they are in and jammied earlier but if they are having fun playing out I leave them a bit longer. It is the same for all the neighbours around here tbh.
They all get up fine for school so I'm not overly concerned and come the summer holidays there will be loads of kids playing out until 9 half 9.

Report

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

Haroldplaystheharmonica · 16/06/2015 16:52

My 10 (nearly) 11 year old has a bedtime of 8.45 but this only happens on Mondays & Thursdays as on Tuesdays & Wednesdays he has scouts / youth club and doesn’t get home til 9.30 which means a 10pm bedtime. Too late for him really as I have to wake him every school morning at 7.45. Weekends are different and he (and his 8 year old brother) stay up from anywhere between 9.30-11.30 depending on whether we’re out or not.

Report
LikeASoulWithoutAMind · 16/06/2015 16:57

My 10 yo has lights out at 8.30pm. The odd later night in the lovely weather doesn't hurt though. Smile

Report
maninawomansworld · 16/06/2015 17:38

Give her an extra half an hour on the condition that she is an absolute ANGEL .
The slightest bit of playing up then you say ' oh you're obviously tired from staying up late so pack it in right now or you're off to bed at 8 tonight'.

Gives her a bit more time out playing with her friends and gives you another quite useful means of making sure she behaves (not saying she's naughty or anything but don't we need all the help we can get!)

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.