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So tonight I did a test aibu

(36 Posts)
Babyturnip Sun 09-Feb-14 23:03:02

So as the title suggests, tonight I did a test. It was positive, my oh does not want anymore babies aibu not to tell him. This was not planned it was once after a few too many.

Joules68 Sun 09-Feb-14 23:03:59

Well he will have to know eventually..

Do you think he might notice?

I think you need to discuss thus with him maturely. smile

deakymom Sun 09-Feb-14 23:05:01

well i don't know what to say except you know your options xx

ladyquinoa Sun 09-Feb-14 23:05:05

I'd probably not tell anyone for a short while. You both had unprotected sex. If he didn't want anymore, he shouldn't have done the deed.

Joysmum Sun 09-Feb-14 23:05:05

You're with the wrong bloke if you can't be honest with him.

I'd hope you'd be able to tell him but don't know either if you so couldn't comment in whether you should or not.

LettertoHermioneGranger Sun 09-Feb-14 23:06:08

Why would you not tell him? Are you terrified he will force you into terminating?

LetsFaceTheMusicAndDance Sun 09-Feb-14 23:06:23

Why would you not want to tell him? Are you considering termination? Fearing consequences? Scared?

Floggingmolly Sun 09-Feb-14 23:06:25

If there is one thing nobody can keep a secret, this is it, I'm afraid.
Do you really imagine you can pretend it's not happening?

How long do you plan to keep it from him?

lougle Sun 09-Feb-14 23:07:24

What would you do, wait until you were over the threshold at 24 weeks??

What would not telling achieve?

LetsFaceTheMusicAndDance Sun 09-Feb-14 23:08:16

Are you ok OP?

Babyturnip Sun 09-Feb-14 23:09:14

Oh I just don't know what to do? I feel so torn, a little excited but if I tell him he will want me to have an abortion and I will have to pretend I will go along with it, we will fight. It's a nightmare sad

Amicus1966 Sun 09-Feb-14 23:10:13

It all depends on what you want really.

BrandNewIggi Sun 09-Feb-14 23:10:58

You can take a few days to get used to the idea if you want. Then you will know what you want before your dp's opinions are part of the mix.
I once didn't tell my DP was a couple of weeks and it was a nice secret to have tbh (I didn't tell as worried about another mc, which is what happened in the end).
Just because he's said he doesn't want more doesn't mean he might not want one that is already conceived, iyswim.

LiberalLibertine Sun 09-Feb-14 23:14:45

So you want this baby, but he what? Wouldn't be keen? Go mad? Have a good think about what you want, then tell him, he's got to be told.

LiberalLibertine Sun 09-Feb-14 23:15:38

Sorry xpost.

He can't make you have a termination. Your not scared of him are you?

Babyturnip Sun 09-Feb-14 23:17:17

I suppose I have a few weeks, it took us quite a while to fall before, I have had ectopic pregnancies and only have one tube I honestly did not think it would happen. I will wait and see how things go, I am pretty scared though, he is lovely but so so grumpy and miserable sometimes hard to be around I don't want to make an atmosphere for the children. Sorry rambling feel a bit shocked tbh.

BrandNewIggi Sun 09-Feb-14 23:21:25

He doesn't sound lovely sad
Congratulations by the way flowers

Babyturnip Sun 09-Feb-14 23:21:38

No he can't, but I hate that feeling of walking on eggshells, he is going to go mental. Mental.

steff13 Sun 09-Feb-14 23:24:50

Don't let him make you do something you don't want to do. Are you safe with him?

Perhaps take a little time to think about how you really feel about it before telling him, and decide what you really want to do.

LiberalLibertine Sun 09-Feb-14 23:25:28

Oh love, it's an accident, his fault as much as yours. It's very sad you're this worried, do you think he will think you've done this on purpose?

Beavie Sun 09-Feb-14 23:28:05

He is lovely? But will go absolutely mental at you for being pregnant? Which he is actually 50% responsible for?

You clearly want this baby, so please don't let him bully you into a termination.

Babyturnip Sun 09-Feb-14 23:30:31

Yes totally safe, I suppose the question is where do I begin? When I s the right time when he is exhausted after work? He works 6 long days, tell him on his day off? When he wants to relax? Will try and get some sleep and get it straight in my head. Thank u for all your advice x

Just remember, it takes 2 to tango. Presumably if he didn't want any more dc he should have used a condom?

How many dc do you/he have?

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