Teacher gift etiquette

(65 Posts)
Onroute66 Wed 17-Jul-13 20:19:09

An individual gift for a teacher and TA. What's reasonable, what's not?

I won't say what I've bought just yet as I want to know if it's crap or ott.

Nanny0gg Wed 17-Jul-13 21:42:53

Seriously, swannylovesu, anything bought or made with thought is appreciated. Your gifts sound lovely.

ConferencePear Wed 17-Jul-13 21:44:42

I really wish parents wouldn't do this.
A thank you note, especially if you can find some particular thing to mention, would be cherished by me.

Summerblaze Wed 17-Jul-13 21:47:32

I bought a card with a personal note of thanks in it and then did little gift bags with chocs, pens, pencils, stickers, rubbers etc.

I took them in yesterday and have had lots of thank you's from the teachers saying how useful they will be.

Picturepuncture Wed 17-Jul-13 21:52:14

If you thinking of giving wine please do check that the recipient drinks! I am amassing a collection of bubbly in my office at school, when I have enough bottles I shall throw a big party with it all! Bubbly I can't even take home and give to hubby to drink as he's a beer/red wine kind of guy! Wonder how many bottles of fizz I need to start a party, have 6 so far from last term and this one!

DH and I (both teachers) amassed enough of the stuff to stock the bar at our engagement party a few years ago! And we had some leftover... Unbelievable! wink

Hissy Wed 17-Jul-13 21:56:19

Why does this even happen? When did it start?

We never had this when I was at school.

I'm grateful to those that teach, but I expect them to do their role to the best of their ability, as i'm expected to do mine!

I find it's another way of playground performers to show how much money they have, how great they are.

I don't think it's a good idea tbh.

knackeredmother Wed 17-Jul-13 21:56:45

I hope I don't cause offence with this but my SIL is a teacher and she gets literally bags full of toiletries, chocolates and wine. She gives most of it away and the toiletries gather dust and actually does not appear to really be bothered about any of it. She does drink the wine but really appreciates the cards.

I always figure if you don't drink it's a great gift to have in stock to take to dinner parties / have in stock for friends and family. Having said that ALL the teachers at our school drink wine.

manicinsomniac Wed 17-Jul-13 22:08:09

This year I got theatre vouchers (from a group of the parents), 2 bottles of wine, 4 boxes of chocolates and a comedy present from a parent who's also a colleague.

Generally speaking (obviously there are lines) I think any or no present is totally acceptable. I've had some embarrassingly expensive presents from individual parents in the past which is awkward but I still appreciate it!

I don't actually agree with all the teachers saying the don't expect presents though. It's been going on for so long that actually, I do expect it. I don't feel I need or deserve them and I don't expect something from everyone but, if the end of term came and I didn't get given anything by anyone, then I think I'd be surprised and maybe even worried that I was a terrible teacher. I'd only feel that because it somehow seems to have become the 'done thing' though, not because I think it should be.

knackeredmother Wed 17-Jul-13 22:11:33

Manic my SIL does say privately that if she doesn't get a present she does wonder why and it is noticed.

manicinsomniac Wed 17-Jul-13 22:44:31

glad I'm not the only one knackeredmother!

raisah Wed 17-Jul-13 23:02:27

Advice needed please for end of year gifts for x 2 teachers, x4 TAs & 1 school bus driver and escort. As theres 8 staff members I cant afford to spend much. I was thinking of buying a gift for the nursery instead so future kids can benefit. What do you think?

ShabbyButNotChic Wed 17-Jul-13 23:23:10

I honestly think anything, no matter how small or inexpensive, is very much appreciated. I work in childcare within a school and some kids bring gifts on the last day, some bring cards/letters, sone bring nothing but say thank you in person. It is all appreciated smile

so far this week (kids finishing childcare different days) i have been given 5 gifts, ranging from a 'party bag' type thing of all my favourite sweets (thanks to the not so subtle questions from the child last week smile ), to a voucher for a manicure from a parent who has 3 children who all come to me. I also have one parent who buys me a £10 boots voucher every summer/xmas as she knows im make up obsessed.

However, i would have to say that my favourite gift this week was the result of a child sitting in a corner for 30mins, using every felt tip/glitter glue they could get their hands on to make me the soggiest messiest picture of me, with the words 'shabby' i love you because you make the best toast and give me cuddles when im sad'. Im not ashamed to say it nearly made me cry hormonal its stuck on my fridge smile

Amy106 Wed 17-Jul-13 23:38:03

As a teacher, I really value and save those child made thank you cards or pictures. They are special to me because they come from the heart and make me smile. smile. I hate the thought that families can be stressed by gift giving. If really pushed, I have also suggested a small donation to any charity that helps children. But really, for me, gifts are not necessary.

Nanny0gg Thu 18-Jul-13 00:04:03

raisah Brilliant idea.

SarahAndFuck Thu 18-Jul-13 00:13:53

I bought a selection of stuff for them to put in their kitchen and share. They have a self contained little kitchen in the classroom so I know the teachers from DS's class will get the benefit of that, plus because it's a foundation class there are two teachers and three or four teaching assistants and a nursery nurse so individual presents were a bit difficult.

DS gave them Tea, coffee, drinking chocolate, flavoured water, three of different types of posh biscuits, yogurt bars, mints, chocolates, pretzels, and a couple of different packs of posh crisps.

I thought they could just share and pick at the bits they liked over lunch or tea break.

And he wrote a card that said thank you to them all.

TwoAndTwoEqualsChaos Thu 18-Jul-13 07:20:45

One of my DCs is going up to Reception this year so, as a thank-you at two settings he is leaving, I have spent or given about £30 to the organisation for something they want (e.g. for one, I got a good deal on ebay for some floor cushions they were after). When a DC let presviously, I bought some nice jigsaws, that sort of thing.

musicposy Thu 18-Jul-13 07:27:16

Just let the child make a note. Or get something really little. Don't spend over a fiver. Here it really is the thought that counts.
I'm a teacher smile

funkybuddah Thu 18-Jul-13 07:31:20

Ds constantly talks about his cooking passion so he is making the teachers his special Brownies and writing out the ingredients and instructions. They got his writing and grammar up to scratch for the yr6 says so he wants to show them what he can do .

Onroute66 Thu 18-Jul-13 07:37:54

I think what I've got should be ok.

It's a small sweet, let's say a mini box of nice sweets, but something they're unlikely to have another of. And a little stationery item.

GangstaGranny Thu 18-Jul-13 07:48:24

I generally make a batch of chocolate fudge that I can share out in home made boxes. My fudge seems to be getting a bit predictable so had to rethink this year.
My fridge is full of Wicked Baileys Truffles! Easy to make, not too evpensive over 3 teachers, 3 TAs and after school club. I'm even taking a batch into work today. Even at £5 a head I would have spent £30 before cards and wrapping.
He husband works at a school (but doesn't teach). Recently he threw away 2 boxes of "No 1 Teacher" type mugs that weren't wanted, such a shame as they all had to be gifts.

27cats Thu 18-Jul-13 07:54:07

Giving something to the nursery setting is a good idea. Books and jigsaws are especially useful, as they do get worn out. smile

FauxFox Thu 18-Jul-13 08:11:36

I try and give gifts that mach my level of appreciation. Some years I just do £10 in the class collection, but teachers that go above and beyond the call of duty to help my kids get more. DDs teacher has spent plenty of his own time making personalised resources to encourage her and for the first time she's really 'got' the point of learning, she adores him. I've got him a family day pass for a local attraction so he can spend a cool day out with his own kids to make up all the time he's spent on mine grin

jojane Thu 18-Jul-13 08:16:56

I think I am gettin one funky pens etc. ds1 has had a supply teacher most f this year due to maternity leav who left last month so we got her some gardening stuff - funky trowel, kneeling mat, seeds etc as she had said in her leaving note that she was looking forward to spending some time in her garden.

SweepTheHalls Thu 18-Jul-13 08:33:19

Every hand written note goes in a file that I read when I have had an awful day and need to remind myself just why I teach.

TwoAndTwoEqualsChaos Thu 18-Jul-13 09:21:10

Oh, and I checked what the setting wanted before I bought stuff ...... That's at Pre-School level, though. Bit different when they are at school.

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