ZOMBIE THREAD ALERT: This thread hasn't been posted on for a while.
to wonder if anyone else is driven slightly potty by a constant stream of silly questions from their DH?(177 Posts)
I love him dearly, but dear god!
Small sample from last 24 hours
I was helping DD2 wash her hair in the bath last night, she usually puts a flannel over her eyes as she's a bit funny about water going in her face and I realised there were no flannels in the bathroom
Me (to DH who is wafting around on the landing): can you just chuck me a flannel please?
DH: where are they?
Me: in the airing cupboard
DH: where in the airing cupboard?
It's a small cupboard, just look!
Me walking into the small downstairs loo
DH: where are you going?
Also this morning - DH works from home in an office in the garden. He came in for a tea/loo break just as I was emptying the washing machine
Me: can you just put this in the tumble drier please? (which he'd have to walk right past to get to the loo)
DH: where is it?
In the utility room, next to the toilet where it has been kept for the past 10 years!!!!!
DH: have you seen my car keys
Me: on the hook in the kitchen
DH: what hook?
The same sodding hook that he put up and has been hanging them on every single day for years
I am being lighthearted, he's not a complete dimwit and pulls his weight with the house and kids, but honestly, I sometimes wonder whether he actually lives here
I don't if this is true, but a colleague told me a few years ago that men tend to look for things in a very different way to women. I can't think of the right word right now, but men have a small visual window so tend to only look into one space if they're looking for something. Women will look all around the area they are searching in and will move things around to find their object.
I had never noticed before, but DH will never find something in a cupboard or drawer because he opens it, looks and shuts it whereas I open, move things, and normally find a lost item.
It may be something to do with the brain, but it's no excuse and is very annoying.
Someone at work does this. Nearly all my colleagues are women, but there is one man who basically refuses to find things or send them to people unless they jump off the computer screen into his face and wave at him. It is really fucking me off because it is not my job to do this, but I keep having to, because he "can't find it". By the time I have found them I feel I may as well send them to the client but I am thinking I should be PA and send them to him and make him send them on. No, I should just stop looking for his crap shouldn't I? AAAAAAAAAAARGHHHHHHH
Diarrhoea rather randomly autocorrected to doody he'a
Constantly, all the time and always about where stuff is - bin bags have lived in a washing up bowl under the kitchen sink for the last 3 years and yet he asks me every time where they are.
Just before Christmas, he asked me if reindeer are real or made up creatures as part of the Santa story.
Ha yes I also use the not being able to find things in a cupboard to my advantage too with treats!
Anyone else's just totally not capable of remembering where dishes go? He empties dishwasher and just puts stuff back in completely random places!
Just before Christmas, he asked me if reindeer are real or made up creatures as part of the Santa story
Don't laugh, but along the same lines, I didn't realise that sea horses were real until I was at an aquarium with my DDs about 3 years ago. I always thought they were some mythical fairy tale creature
my dad did this all the time and my mum
dad: Do you want a coffee love?
mum: Ooh yes please
dad: Wheres the coffee?
mum: In the cupboard above the kettle
dad: The cupboard at the end? I don't see any coffee
mum: No the cupboard above where the kettle sits
Dad: That's just full of pans
Mum: No, that's the cupboard under where the kettle is
Dad: Is the sugar with the coffee?
Mum: Oh fgs I,ll just come make it myself
Dad: Would you make me one while you're there.....Throws me a wink.
Since that day with any men I refuse to bail them out looking for things even if I know where it is. My dad did it deliberately so my mum would just do it instead because 'it was quicker'
Which sandwich box is which (when making the childrens sandwiches) me- they have their names on in two places, how can you no see that?
Don't know why my DH does this, but he does. He's perfectly competent and I always refuse to give him an answer, but he still asks stupid stuff.
DH goes to freezer to find bread and make toast for DD.
DH: Is this all the bread we have?
Me: I have no idea, why do you ask?
DH: There's only one slice left
Me: Oh, that's interesting. Where did you look?
DH: In the top drawer of the freezer
Me: Maybe you could try looking in the other drawers?
DH: (huff, puff) No, there's no more bread.
I mean, surely it's quicker just to look for yourself than run back and forwards between me and the kitchen asking???
freddie 'are you going to have a bath?' as I'm walking into the bathroom wearing a dressing gown while the bath taps are running
Mine has the annoying habit of replying to any statement with 'Are you?'
Me: I'm just popping to the shops.
DH: Are you?
Me: No I am running away to sea.
It's up there with the questioning the bleeding obvious scenarios. In fact my DH does that too come to think of it.
My DP does this too but also via DD. For example:
10 mins before we need to leave for school, I'm changing baby.
DD: I'm hungry
DP: shall I get DD1 breakfast?
Me: Yes please
DP: what's she having?
Me: I've already chopped melon then there's porridge sachets in front of the microwave
DP: which flavour will she have?
Cue DD: HELLO!! I am standing in front of you, why not ask me instead of expecting mummy to be a mind reader?
My DH does the exact thing
Me- I am going to the shops do you need anything
DH- I don't know what do I need
Another is the lack of ability to make a choice by himself
<going to take DS to bed>
DH- What book do you want me to read to him?
Me- just pick one off his bookshelf
DH- what type of book should I pick?
PessaryPam: "Me: No I am running away to sea."
How about this one. Making the bed together (OK I expect that means I forfeit any right to complain!), DH goes off to get the bedding.
DH: "Which sheets do you want?"
Me: "The usual ones."
DH: "Which are they then?"
Me: "They are the only double sheets."
We have 3 identical cream-coloured sheets, which he has been sleeping on every night for the last 10 years. They are our only double sheets. The kids have single sheets of other colours, stored elsewhere.
DH: "Well I wasn't sure."
It's shopping in our house, specifically DH buying the cheapest stuff possible even if it's shit or has gone off. And this, with our 23 month old:
DH: Here DS, a nice pear for you
Me: (as DS goes to bite it) Have you washed it?
DH: ( as son is biting into it) Oh sorry, forgot
DH: Got you some grapes DS
Me: Have you washed them?
DH: Sorry, forgot
Me: You need to wash his fruit before he eats it love
DH: Why are you always having a go at me
Totally relating to this thread. I have recently found that retorting to the endless questions with a stabby "why are you asking me?" has helped to decrease the volume of inane questions.
What I find particularly rage inducing are questions that I clearly cannot answer:
DP: Why has DD thrown her cup on the floor?
Me: Why are you asking me? <with the look of rage>
DP: Oh, just wondering ... wasn't expecting an answer ....
Me: <thought bubble - "idiot">
And this is why some people ask how the fuck men got and keep the majority of the power in society.
I know it's lighthearted, but sheesh.
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
All v funny and relating with these stories as my DH does the same. Two of his most annoying habits are not looking properly for lost items and asking loads of annoying questions!
DH, I swear, switches off his brain as soon as he stops work. It's like he husbands all his mental resources for work, and then relies fully on mine for life in general. (Except tennis - he has to use his own for that too.)
Daddy-looking - yep.
Where? to every single "could you please put x in y" request
Where are the towels/flannels/clothes pegs/cloths etc. etc. - every time.
CoalDust - it's because they "save their thinking for "higher things" " and let us poor women do all the trivial day-to-day thinking for them. Or that's how they'd like it to go.
DS1 has already started with the "Daddy-looking". It annoys the hell out of me
If DH asks stupid questions such as "What are you doing?" "Where are you going?" when it's bloody obvious, then I get sarcastic - "What does it look like I'm doing - perhaps going to the bathroom, does it look like that? Yes? Well that's exactly what I am doing, surprise, surprise"
He still does it though
merlincat even when it has a coil fitted?
"I walk over to said cupboard, moves vinegar, hey presto there is salt !
Are men unable to move things to find other things ?"
But..... how do you know the vinegar needs moving and the salt is behind it?
<mystified and slightly suspicious that women have some sort of x ray vision>
Sorry but this is hilarious! Please post more!
Thumbs, my DM used to say that her DH used to decide important things such as whether to recognize Namibia or not, and she just did the trivial stuff like where they lived, what car they had etc
Thing is, it is bollocks and you are enabling them. If you weren't there do you think everyone would starve or they'd never find their car keys ever again? Of course not, they'd engage their brain and actually look properly.
Sounds about right, PessaryPam - gah!
Fakebook - see, I refuse to accept that it's "just men" because my Dad is not like this. He sees things. My mum couldn't though. When I was 41w pg, I dinged the back door of the car I was borrowing off my parents - DH didn't notice until I pointed it out to him, but I knew there wasn't a cat's chance in hell of it getting past Dad's eagle eyes - and I was right. First thing he spotted. However, it does seem to be one of the "learned helplessness" tricks that a lot of men are so good at - my Dad has other examples of these (can't possibly operate a washing machine or dishwasher, for e.g. )
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