To think it's a bit odd that colleague isn't buying his DD Christmas presents?

(159 Posts)
PurpleTinsel Tue 11-Dec-12 11:58:31

I have a colleague who's first baby (a DD) was born about 6 months ago.

This will be her first Christmas. We were talking about Christmas yesterday, and colleague said that he and his DP are not buying their DD any Christmas presents at all because she's too young to appreciate Christmas.

I can understand not making a big deal about Christmas for a baby - but the idea that they're buying no Christmas presents for her at all, not even one small inexpensive present, surprised me.

Colleague is well paid and his family celebrate Christmas.

AIBU to think that this is odd behaviour?

CheungFun Mon 17-Dec-12 17:39:15

I agree with the OP, to me it does seem a bit odd not to buy anything at all for a baby. DS was born on Xmas Eve, but we still bought him a few little toys as Christmas presents and DM bought him a lovely teddy bear.

I don't think there's any need to go mad and buying up Hamleys, but I'd definitely buy something.

Meggymoodle Mon 17-Dec-12 16:57:51

I think Christmas is totally over commercialized anyway; the idea of perpetuating that and buying for a small baby who has no idea what it's all about seems ludicrous. As someone else has said, it's generally for an older sibling that presents would be a good idea. DD was born 3 weeks before Christmas and didn't get anything for Christmas from anyone which seemed totally reasonable. I am still buying very little for our DC (3 and 2) as they get so much stuff and that is really not what Christmas is about anyway.

OhSantaClaussOhOh Mon 17-Dec-12 16:53:37

@ fishy Why does it have anything to do with not loving your child???
It might be that your present will be the one she will prefer on the day. It might be that the present she will prefer in the long run is one that another member of your family had chosen for her. Who knows??
I don't think anyone has said that their dcs would have no present at all (which would be very mean imo) and sin't your case.

OhSantaClaussOhOh Mon 17-Dec-12 16:48:55

I am shock by the several people who say 'Oh I am not buying anything for my 1yo because a lot of other people will do so anyway'.

And then people who then say 'Oh dc is just 1 yo and will not remember so it doesn't matter'

On that sort of line, why on earth would any grandparent or aunty/uncle by anything for the lo??....
And how these people would feel if said GP or PIL were NOT buying a present for the first christmas of their gc....

I agree with usualsuspect. I would always buy something for a lo in the family. So why would I not buy one for my own child confused

fishybits Mon 17-Dec-12 16:46:04

DD will be 11 months at Christmas. The pile of presents for her from family is ridiculous. I've told people not to buy anything for her January birthday and we'll split the present pile in two. Her present from us is a stocking filled with shredded paper, loo roll and kitchen towel. The mess will be incredible and I can guarantee that our "present" will be the most fun for her.

So you can add DH and I to the list of disgraceful parents who clearly don't love their children.

showmethetoys Mon 17-Dec-12 16:40:38

I love to see xmas pictures too,but I like to see people actually spending time and having fun with each other. Why do I need to see darling little 7 month old Johnnie's christmas haul, who exactly is that sort of photo for?

usualsuspect3 Mon 17-Dec-12 16:35:20

I like to see lovely christmas pictures on FB. But then I'm not an old misery.

usualsuspect3 Mon 17-Dec-12 16:33:37

I would always buy any babies in my family a present at christmas. It would seem odd to me not to.

Like I was leaving them out.

showmethetoys Mon 17-Dec-12 16:31:02

I really dont get the whole buying your baby tons of presents either!

DS was 4 months last xmas and he got a jumperoo as did every other baby on the planet it seemed and this xmas we have also just got him one 'large' toy that I am hoping he will really like. He has already got loads of toys, plus the rest of our family are going to buy him stuff anyway. He is still to young to understand or give a shit, plus I know that I have got years ahead of him telling me exactly what he wants!

I really dont understand the people who not only buy their 6 month old a shitload of toys for christmas, but then do the boakworthy thing of posting a picture of all the toys all wrapped up on xmas eve, onto Facebook. Why would you do this?

weegiemum Mon 17-Dec-12 16:24:48

On my first Christmas, the only present I got was a cuddly panda which I still have. I was 42 yesterday, it came from my great gran and great great auntie. When I got it I was 9 days old!

I love the fact, even now, that I got that one present. I'm still very keen on pandas - for my birthday yesterday I went to Edinburgh Zoo to see the real live ones!

We got a few things for dd1 and ds on their first Christmas, they were almost 11 months. For dd2, nothing much. She was 5 weeks!!

prettybird Mon 17-Dec-12 16:15:59

Disgraceful. She'll be scarred for life! wink

nickelbabylyinginamanger Mon 17-Dec-12 12:25:27

DD had her first birthday last week.
she had lots of presents, none of which she could work out how to open, but most of which were useful rather than fun!

and it occurs to me now that i didn't take a single photograph of her with her gifts.

halcyondays Sun 16-Dec-12 23:17:26

Yanbu, mine were 6/7 months when it was their first Xmas, so old enough to play with baby toys.

MrsDeVere Sun 16-Dec-12 21:55:02

No need to apologise on my behalf.
I was just sayin' s'all grin

You get a lot of nonsense thrown about on here about what is abusive. Now that is a disgrace.

fuckwittery Sun 16-Dec-12 21:50:35

sorry, I'm going to apologise for the facebook comment and the snide comment about whether presents were bought on credit. I am just FUMING at the disgrace comment / people with terrible childhoods hmm. emotionally abusive childhoods are a whole different kettle of fish from not buying a baby a present.

foreverondiet Sun 16-Dec-12 21:30:09

YABU baby is 6 months old and is not aware of Christmas or presents. I agree only reason to buy is so that older siblings see baby gets something.

ceeveebee Sun 16-Dec-12 21:25:14

YABU

It's my twins 2nd Christmas - they're 13 mo - and we aren't getting them anything. They have everything they need already. And family will buy lots so really no need.

MrsDeVere Sun 16-Dec-12 21:09:22

Ahem
I post photos on fb of my DCs surround buried in tons of tat.

I don't think 'non buying babies parents' are abusive though.

Each to their own.

Calling people disgraceful is just silly.

fuckwittery Sun 16-Dec-12 20:54:43

Errr mummyto somespoiltbrats whoever you said this

i just dont agree with the no pressies thats a disgrace and most people i know would agree

So not just expressing your opinion are you? You seem to think you are speaking for the majority of public opinion.

and

Id say different read so many posts on here from those who had christmas with no presents as children and none of them were happy.

REALLY? an impressive survey you've carried out on childhood emotional abuse, with parents who don't give babies presents?

Fuck off dearest to post pictures on facebook of your children surrounded by tons of tat (hope you can afford it and it's not on credit)

monsterchild Sat 15-Dec-12 22:14:41

YANBU to feel as you do, but you are BU to think it's some kind of lack of affection by the parents. His explaination is pretty reasonable, as is yours. You can agree to disagree, and I'm guessing both your kids and his will be ok.

nonameslefttouse Sat 15-Dec-12 22:09:02

Our DD was only 4 months old on her first Christmas we did buy gifts for but mainly for DS benefit to shaw Father Christmas hadn't forgot her, come to think of it think she was still opening them in spring!

LalyRawr Sat 15-Dec-12 22:04:29

Aww I didn't realise I was in the minority!

My OH is of the same opinion as most of you, that our nearly 10 month old has no clue about anything and its all pretty pointless.

...but I still bought her presents and wrapped them in 'Baby's first Christmas' wrapping paper! Though I do realise everything I have done ( Presents, stockings, letter from Santa) is more for my benefit then hers.

mummytokdj Sat 15-Dec-12 21:49:58

Oh my fuckwittery i clearly said IMO, but as usual people nit pick and read what they want. I certainly have not lowered myself to name calling unlike yourself says alot about your mentality to be honest!!!

Do i agree with no presents.... Hell no bah humbug christmas is for presents IMO

fuckwittery Sat 15-Dec-12 21:42:18

Yes that's true, I gave my second presents as a baby as her elder sister would have questioned.
I'm possibly abusive because I am thinking this year of telling my two it's Christmas Day a day late, so my DH can be home and not at work. It will mean they don't actually open a single present on Christmas day.

GoldQuintessenceAndMyhrr Sat 15-Dec-12 21:36:28

DS1 was 8 month old for his first Christmas, he had no presents to unwrap. My mum sent me money to buy a Stokke high chair for him for Christmas. Best present he could ever have. Mil sent us a mclaren stroller for Christmas, for him. Excellent. He got Christmas present on his second Christmas because he was excited and could unwrap presents. Ds2 was 6 months for his first Christmas, he got presents because by then ds1 was nearly 4 and HE would question his brother not getting presents.

But for a first born, a tiny baby does not need presents to unwrap.

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