Mumsnet Talk

Not being rude - I genuinely have never met one.

I know one, I don't think he is on MN though.

Ineed - well done gel - what's he like?

I've met men who say thay are single dads when the DCs are with them at weekends.

I'm assuming you mean dads who have the care of the DCs during the school week?

excuse typo ^

I meet a lot in my work and have met a few in RL, my husband was a LP (his wife was an alcoholic) when i met him. I think that it is becoming more commom, but dads seem to have to fight the court system, who is happy to place a child with other female relatives before the father.

Line - I mean proper single Dads. Have full care, deal with everything. Like Single Mums do.

Birds - what is your work?

Why?

I know one. But it's due to tragic circumstances.

CP SW. I have worked across social care and i am a voluntary welfare benefits advisor ( i have done other voluntary work, HIV etc).

He is nice, if a bit PFB about his DD (even though she is his 3rd) ie, he belives her word absolutly over anyone elses. If she has a complaint about school, he whinges and bitches to the Mums in our circle of friends, but never speaks to the school about it, then moans they don't speak to him
He has DS (18) and DD (15 I think) from his 1st marriage(?) He did most of the care when they were babies, but they moved in with their Mum when they split.
Then he has a DD (9) and has been her sole carer since she was a few months old, afaik the Mum hasn't been in contact since then.
We have a laugh, and he is like 'one of the Mums' if that makes sense

If I'm honest I have a slight crush on him but for his looks not his personality

I've met plenty, four of my friends were raised by their dads.

In all these cases the mums had just left very suddenly to go off with another fella.

Well when it comes to seperations men get screwed over by the system. i would probably be right in thinking that the majority of single dads are usually a result of the mother dying with a small percentage of men actually getting full custody.

I bet as well that most mothers in here would assume in a seperation that they get the child. It is just how it is.

It's mostly financial too.

My FIL was one. Dh's biological mother buggered off when dh was 1 and bil was 2. Never set eyes on her again. Afaik she never got in touch.

Because this thread,as far as i am aware is in no way an attack on dads, i don't think that it is fair to make statements about who should/wants the chidren.

Op-is there a reason why you ask?

Although I have always made far more than DS2's Dad, he just wasn't really interested until he was about 3 by which time we had split up.

The only single dads I met were fake ones, part time, alternate weekends type.

I know one, lovely, lovely man.

He has his 2 dds and for a long time cared for his step daughter too.......in fact when his step dd ended up in a specialist bording schoo for kids with problems he was the only one who turned up for her reviews etc, his ex never bothered.

He now has full custody of both kids, his eldest has autism and she's thrived since she's been with her dad full time.

I know several single dads. My cousin whose wife sadly passed away 5 days after giving birth (Cancer)
My best friend whose wife passed away not long after giving birth.

Another friends wife passed away with cancer
and my 4th male friend's wife walked out on him and doesn't bother to see her daughter.

I personally think that the set up of women being at home and dads distant hasn't done anyone any good. Some men don't parent babies well through lack of confidence etc. In the same way older women don't think that they can do things that men can. It is partly because of gender stereo typing.

BIRD - I was thinking to myself that it would be nice to know a single Dad who could do bloke stuff with my boys and if he had girls I could take them bra shopping if he didnt want to.

Even as I was thinking it I saw problems. Then I thought - I do not know one single Dad and all my mates are single Mums.

I think that needing a parent of the same gender is sometimes a bit of a myth, but it is a shame that people don't have extended family anymore. If a mum or dad wasn't about, there used to be Aunts, Uncles, BIL's.

My OH had fulltime custody of his daughter from the age of 5 - she is now nearly 19. She only saw her mother in school holidays.