Incident with a Prostitute

[anothercharlieandlola]

I have been toying with posting about this for a while. I don't have a question as such, it is just an incident about a week ago that stuck in my mind and the couple of people I mentioned it to weren't very interested in discussing it.

I was in the town centre with dc's and dh to see the christmas lights etc and we walked past a man in a car picking up a prostitute outside of the train station (it was only about 7pm). The two girls looked to be just teenagers and the man in is 30's. He looked massive inside a small car so he was a big bloke. The conversation went along these lines:

one of the girls: If you want it, I'll give you it
man (in scary aggressive tone): well get in the car then. What, do you want me to get out the car?!

It is hard to convey how aggressive he sounded. I felt scared of him. I keep wondering if she was ok. I am not totally niave and have seen prostitutes before but I have never seen how they are viewed and treated by the men. This just totally depressed me. (DH didn't notice it happening.)

I also considered posting in AIBU (aibu to let this upset me?) but was worried I would get the piss taken out of me! Also, I didn't want a massive audience for some reason. Reading it back, it looks like nothing really.

I just wondered what people's comments would be really. Thanks.

[worldgonecrazy]

Where on earth do you live? I've been outside lots of train stations and I've never seen men picking up prostitutes outside the station. My first thought is 'how do you know they were prostitutes', could it have been a pissed off elder brother/father picking up his daughters who were on a night out?

[WilsonFrickett]

It would have upset me, and if I'd been able to take his reg number I would have done so and passed it along to the police. I used to live near a prostitution zone and have phoned the police because of intimidating behaviour - 99% of it from men I have to say. I have also called because I spotted a very young teenagers working, and on that occasion the police were out in minutes.

Having said that, you do sound a bit niave (I mean that kindly). What did you think men's who use prostitutes attitudes towards them would be like?

[keSnowBi]

Def prostitutes? Sounds like a drug deal.

[thunderboltsandlightning]

You're not being unreasonable. Men who use prostituted women are very violent to them. Usually they do it out of sight, but it looks like you caught a glimpse of what women in prostitution have to face day in day out.

Prostitution is one of the world's most dangerous occupations, pretty much up there with being a soldier. Same sorts of rates of PTSD too.

[anothercharlieandlola]

It was a little back alley that we cut through, although it was fairly busy with cars.

I suppose I am a quite niave really. I knew intellectually that these women were vulnerable and that they would be subject to abuse and complete lack of respect, but actually witnessing the intimidation and contempt felt different to 'knowing' it iykwim.

It could have been a drug deal KeS, I didn't think of that. Still a bit worrrying that one of them got in the car with this man tho.

[anothercharlieandlola]

That's interesting about PTSD thunder. It's something you don't really think about.

[keSnowBi]

Also the amount of prostitutes who moved into it after childhood sexual abuse is staggering

[WilsonFrickett]

Yep, I didn't think about drugs, and it's all linked. Round our way the prostitutes were known for selling joints and of course many prostitutes are there because of drug addiction in the first place.

[weeonion]

or if they dont have a substance misuse problem before they get into it - they can very quickly develop one to cope.

[WhingingNinja]

Might not have been prostitues at all.
but even so, the scene you witnessed does happen every day with thousands of women who have resorted to prostitution.

It is the sad reality that women with choices dont sleep with strangers for money.

They can't afford to pick and chose their clients. They will often know that they are likely to be assualted/put in danger and yet they get in anyway because they need the money.

It isn't a pleasant thought