Is it possible to make a cat more affectionate?

[Catmint]

My cat is 9 months old. She is playful and not at all aggressive. But neither is she in any way affectionate during the day. She doesn't like being stroked, and we don't pick her up, as she clearly doesn't like it.

At night, she will come into our bed for a cuddle, will be stroked and is purry.

Why is she only affectionate in the middle of the night, and can we do anything to encourage it during the day?

Thanks.

[Terrortree]

Fooooooooooood!

Also they do get more snuggly with age. My 3 year old has just this year discovered the joys of laps. Before that cuddles were strictly first thing in the morning under the duvet.

[Catmint]

I don't want to just bribe with food, although vitamin paste and dreamies do prove useful when I am desperate!

[Fluffycloudland77]

Obviously she is busy doing cat stuff all day so she schedules you in before bed.

She's only got one set of paws you know

[AndiPandi]

Errr no! Cat's are very much their own people, sometimes even choose a new owner! Is it a girl by any chance? IME that is typical female cat behaviour, boy cats are much more cuddly & affectionate.

[itsnothingoriginal]

I wish there was! My tortie girl is only affectionate on her own terms and has her 'chosen few' allowed to stroke her.

Our cat is also quite young so hopeful that she'll become a little more affectionate in time!

[Fluffycloudland77]

Dh's childhood cat didnt like any of them but loved the neighbour. Cats can be very cruel like that.

[AwkwardSquad]

I've found that cats become more affectionate as they age, too. Only had female cats so don't know about males.

The cat we have now is a rescue cat and we don't think she was well socialised as a kitten. She is gradually showing and receiving affection more and more easily; we coax her very very gently and talk to her a lot. But it's still a red letter day if she actually sits on one of us and it never lasts more than a few minutes!

[Catmint]

Yes she is a girl, we have had her since 9 weeks.

[Fluffycloudland77]

9 months old in a cat is like a teenager in human years. It's her first summer & there's so much excitement for them.

[HolidayCriminal]

Grumpy cat loathed everyone but I tamed him with kindness.

he still tries to bite or scratch me occasionally, but just loving him up to the extent he would allow has made him come to adore me. I don't deserve it, I still think he's a sad little slug. But proves it can be done.