My beloved mother who is in her late 60s has recently got a cav. We chose this dog for/ with her (she was looking at puppies of unsuitable, highly active breed like border collies) as a rescued adult dog specified good with kids who wouldn't mind missing the occasional walk (my Mum is good, but not 100% consistent, at taking the dog out daily for walks, but she has a very large rural garden). This seems to have worked marvellously and she and the dog have bonded well.
However not long after she got this dog there was a family emergency in our household and she came down to help out at very short notice (the same day). Obviously in those circumstances I said the dog could come with her even though we had previously said we weren't keen on having it here when she asked about it. So, it came, it was in season, it scent marked all over the house and peed a few times on our carpets, but wasn't badly behaved. Now, because the dog travels well she seems to think it can come to our house whenever she comes. We don't want a dog in our house, particularly. It isn't that we hate the dog, it's partly that I feel I have to monitor the children and dog's interactions all the time - my two year old in particular wants to cuddle the dog and I can see the dog gets fed up - and partly because, well, we aren't doggy people and we don't really see why this dog needs to visit and stay (Mum has had other larger breeds in the past and has never asked for dog to visit with her). We have offered to pay for kennels if finances are an issue. At Christmas she rang up the night before - having known she was visiting for two months - to say 'It's okay if the dog comes, isn't it?' and we felt we had no choice but to say yes. Now she is asking about half term and I have said several times that she can come, but the dog can't (we can't visit her this time for various reasons) and she is blaming my husband, asking if he goes away on business that week can she bring the dog etc.
So, why doesn't she get that we don't want her dog visiting? I have spelled it out repeatedly. I understand she loves it...but when she visited my other sister who lives in London, so she had to go on the train - she didn't even consider taking the dog, she got a neighbour to look after it. Why does she think she can bring it here? Do people normally expect to bring their dogs when they visit? Am I being unreasonable?? It's so strange to me - she has owned a dog for 15 years and this has never been an issue before...
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The doghouse
Am I being unreasonable? In all seriousness..
15 replies
ilikemysleep · 28/01/2013 23:39
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