17 yo DS sleeping at girlfriend's house/gf sleeping over here?

[Aliceismagic1]

My DS is 17 and has been in a 5 month relationship with his girlfriend. Recently he asked if she would be able to sleep over- is in same bed (she has spent the night before when very drunk and stayed on the couch with easy access toilet ) . My initial reaction was no but he is 17 and I can understand the want to be in the same bed as each other The subject of sex has only been ran over very quickly with the usual 'use protection' etc. so I am now considering it but was wondering what other people did regarding 16/17 yo and allowing DD/S to sleep at each other's houses.

[butterflyballs]

My dd is 16, 17 in a few months. We haven't had this issue yet but I wouldn't be comfortable with it really.

I'm sure you'll get a load of replies saying it's fine, they'll be having sex anyway, better under your lo g than in an alleyway but I absolutely would not be happy with my child having sex in the next room.

[butterflyballs]

Roof. Not l og.

:o

[Mrsjayy]

Dd first stayed at her boyfriends house when she was 17 they had been together 6 months i thought id have a huge issue with it but i was suprisingly ok with it they are still together 4 years later

[dexter73]

My dd(18) stayed at her boyfriends or here from when she was 17. Them having sex in the same house as me doesn't bother me. I have sex in the house when she is in it so why not the other way round!

[MirandaWest]

My DC aren't that age yet but I haven't had any problems with DPs DS having his GF staying. He's a couple of years older than the OPs DS though.

[Floralnomad]

I have no problems with my DS having sex but we don't have people sleeping over purely because of the impact it would have on the rest of the family ,ie our behaviour would have to change IYSWIM . That said my DS is old enough to move out if it bothered him that much and he shows no sign of that at the moment . I would also add that I don't charge my DS any rent / housekeeping - if I was likely to do that then I think the 'my house, my rules' thing would be less likely to work . His current partner has a flat and he stays over there a couple of times a week .

[Rascalls3]

I have 3 daughters ( 19-22) and have been happy for long term boyfriends to stay over. I would be happy if it was my 17 year old son for his girlfriend to stay over. I have never heard anything ??and have found it very useful to get to know the boys well around the dining table.

[SirChenjin]

Not after 5 months. DS1 is almost 18 and has been going out with his GF for nearly 2 years. I wouldn't have a problem at all with them sharing a bed at this stage, but 5 months isn't a long term relationship in my book, esp. at that age.

If you don't feel comfortable with it then the answer is no - although you can revisit the issue in a few months.

[wickedwaterwitch]

I let my 17 yo have his girlfriend here overnight. We've had the contraceptive talk, he's 17, our house is big enough so I'm ok with it.

They're going to have sex somewhere, I'd rather it was somewhere safe. 5 months is AGES when you're 17!

[SirChenjin]

It's ages when you're 17 - that doesn't mean it has to be ages to the adult whose permission you are seeking.

[nequidnimis]

My rules are over 16, long term relationship (1 year+) and that I like them

Until then they can sneak around if they want to but I'm not going to approve or facilitate.

[PeaStalks]

Over 17, long term relationship (and I do accept that five months is long term at 17) then I would be happy.

I think you need to grit your teeth and have much more of a conversation about contraception. Make sure he has condoms and knows how to use them. Put some in the bathroom.

The pill can fail, this can be due to illness, conflicting medicines, or carelessness over taking it.

I have said to my DSs that they should never leave contraception in the hands of the girl alone. Belts and braces is the way to go. An unwanted pregnancy over which they have no control is a life changer.

[Cherryapple1]

I let DD have her bf to stay once she was 17. I felt bit odd at first, but she is entitled to a sex life and it is her home too. I made sure all contraception was in place first. He is just the nicest bloke which helps. His parents are happy for him to stay here too.